Search found 1339 matches

by TT2.0
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:44 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Near Death Experience Thread
Replies: 27
Views: 326

Re: The Near Death Experience Thread

I have to admit going on stage an hour later and opening with the story as a bit and getting laughs with it made me feel more like a professional comic than anything else. Jerry Wayne took it and headlined. Was just kind of confirmation that I actually know what I'm doing. I cried all night that nig...
by TT2.0
Thu Sep 17, 2020 8:43 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Near Death Experience Thread
Replies: 27
Views: 326

The Near Death Experience Thread

So I almost died In a car wreck tuesday night. I know I used to tend to be prone to hyperbole, but the truck i was riding in hydroplaned, did 2 complete spins at 70 miles an hour across three lanes of traffic, so even though we didn't hit anything objectively we should have died. I had a span of abo...
by TT2.0
Sat Sep 12, 2020 11:25 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Random SwamperFacts
Replies: 37
Views: 650

Re: Random SwamperFacts

brian wrote: Sat Sep 12, 2020 5:42 pm Did you graduate from TSU, TT?
nah. 2 year dropout
by TT2.0
Sat Sep 12, 2020 12:45 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook
Replies: 2496
Views: 208210

Re: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook

You gonna change your name to El Mermelada?
by TT2.0
Fri Sep 11, 2020 3:00 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread
Replies: 1521
Views: 34766

Re: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread

I had the worst panic attack of my life yesterday. it lasted. 7 hours. i woke up today feeling like I've been through a war Jesus, that is horrible. I've been getting some serious anxiety lately, not sure if anything qualifies as a panic attack, but pretty close. Can't imagine 7 hours... Is anxiety...
by TT2.0
Fri Sep 11, 2020 8:01 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread
Replies: 1521
Views: 34766

Re: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread

I had the worst panic attack of my life yesterday. it lasted. 7 hours. i woke up today feeling like I've been through a war Jesus, that is horrible. I've been getting some serious anxiety lately, not sure if anything qualifies as a panic attack, but pretty close. Can't imagine 7 hours... Is anxiety...
by TT2.0
Fri Sep 11, 2020 7:37 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread
Replies: 1521
Views: 34766

Re: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread

I had the worst panic attack of my life yesterday. it lasted. 7 hours. i woke up today feeling like I've been through a war
by TT2.0
Wed Sep 09, 2020 10:56 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

brian wrote: Wed Sep 09, 2020 5:33 pm The smell of blood from your gums being burned with a laser is...well, it's not a good smell.
it's oddly terrifying to me.
by TT2.0
Tue Sep 08, 2020 9:50 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook
Replies: 2496
Views: 208210

Re: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook

If all of you leave facebook you will lose access to my dead celebrity jokes, and it makes me sad that none of you care.
by TT2.0
Tue Sep 08, 2020 10:06 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook
Replies: 2496
Views: 208210

Re: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook

i will block family. Fuckem. People who add stress are removed no exceptions
by TT2.0
Thu Sep 03, 2020 6:41 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Trump Admin Meltdown Thread Part V - All Hail King Donald, First of his name
Replies: 2009
Views: 56028

Re: Trump Admin Meltdown Thread Part V - All Hail King Donald, First of his name

Trump has been, for the duration of his presidency, fixated on staging military parades, but only of a certain sort. In a 2018 White House planning meeting for such an event, Trump asked his staff not to include wounded veterans, on grounds that spectators would feel uncomfortable in the presence o...
by TT2.0
Tue Sep 01, 2020 9:56 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate
Replies: 2136
Views: 31733

Re: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate

Sometimes I wish I didn't have to be relatively careful on social media. "Do you think the RNC is bummed about the timing of the Kenosha shooting? I mean... If this had all happened last week they could've added the 17 year old white murderer to the speaking roster in Charlotte." If you w...
by TT2.0
Sat Aug 29, 2020 6:44 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

As soon as i got offstage last night my brain reminded me that I have no shows in september, one in october and then none until the end of time and i don't understand how i ever got booked on the ones i had and now it might be all about to come to a crashing halt. Don't mind me, just going to keep m...
by TT2.0
Sat Aug 29, 2020 9:19 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Worthy of mention, too obscure for own thread
Replies: 3857
Views: 213992

Re: Worthy of mention, too obscure for own thread

Chadwick fucking Bozeman gets put in this thread and yall wonder why I feel like I'm not getting my own
by TT2.0
Fri Aug 28, 2020 4:39 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Proud Parental Unit Crowing Thread
Replies: 2525
Views: 127346

Re: Proud Parental Unit Crowing Thread

My 23 year old son is having trouble finding full time work in his chosen field (Industrial Design), but bless him, he's staying busy writing for a couple of websites. His first feature - and it's a wild bit of history. https://www.hotcars.com/how-saabs-viggen-fighter-almost-took-down-legendary-sr-...
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 27, 2020 6:17 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Hurricane Laura
Replies: 13
Views: 349

Re: Hurricane Laura

missed me completely in case anyone was wondering
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 27, 2020 6:07 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Important Sounds of Things Falling Apart
Replies: 1194
Views: 46824

Re: The Important Sounds of Things Falling Apart

Why couldn't you have just stopped at "well crafted commentary?" :(
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 27, 2020 12:18 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Important Sounds of Things Falling Apart
Replies: 1194
Views: 46824

Re: The Important Sounds of Things Falling Apart

Im just going to post this here so it doesn't start a fb war. You guys know im joking and i think this shit is horrible...but

Kyle Rittenhouse is exactly what happens when you force school shooters to take zoom classe
by TT2.0
Tue Aug 25, 2020 10:31 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Weather
Replies: 2497
Views: 106990

Re: The Weather

riding out this hurricane. my house is in pearland for all yall weather channel watchers. wish me luck
by TT2.0
Tue Aug 25, 2020 8:59 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Kobe Bryant
Replies: 101
Views: 3117

Re: Kobe Bryant

Has it been long enough for me to make the joke yet?
by TT2.0
Mon Aug 24, 2020 1:14 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate
Replies: 2136
Views: 31733

Re: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate

There is no valid reason to sniff children man.
by TT2.0
Mon Aug 24, 2020 1:13 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate
Replies: 2136
Views: 31733

Re: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate

Man, didn't think my comment on the Biden video would lead to this much discussion... I am confident Biden had all the best intentions, and I was somewhat sarcastically saying it shows he isn't inappropriate towards girls/women, just awkward in touching people. If he was a sexual predator, he would...
by TT2.0
Sun Aug 23, 2020 11:42 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

Best month i've had so far was 1300, so yeah probably can't play spring ball.
by TT2.0
Sat Aug 22, 2020 10:37 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate
Replies: 2136
Views: 31733

Re: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate

Someone want to take a run at defending the whole him sniffing people thing, or can we just go back to yes, its wrong and hes a creepy fuck, but he's better than what we have?
by TT2.0
Sat Aug 22, 2020 10:35 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

I reread shit I write here when I'm depressed, so feel free to ignore this one, but I just want to remember how good this thing feels when you manage to do it well. Tonight was soooo good. You may not be rich (yet), but you are a professional comedian. Think of how many people want to be able to sa...
by TT2.0
Sat Aug 22, 2020 7:05 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate
Replies: 2136
Views: 31733

Re: 2020 Presidential Election: Joe Biden vs Whoever the Republicans Nominate

Wow. Biden talking to that boy was some powerful stuff. I've heard that he does call random kids he meets to help them with their stuttering. Trying not to be sarcastic and flippant here, but look at the way Joe is manhandling the kid. It proves he isn't being creepy with girls and young women, it'...
by TT2.0
Sat Aug 22, 2020 12:18 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

I reread shit I write here when I'm depressed, so feel free to ignore this one, but I just want to remember how good this thing feels when you manage to do it well. Tonight was soooo good.
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 20, 2020 12:21 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

TT are you doing a show with Billy D. Washington on the lineup? I met him through an old Rockets message board and he gave me tickets to see him in Ft. Worth when I lived up in DFW area. He was on tour with Christopher Reid (Kid) and the 15 minutes spent chatting with both of them after the show is...
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 20, 2020 11:20 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

Shirley wrote: Thu Aug 20, 2020 10:37 am Yeah, TT, you're funny and you're good on stage. I know, we're all shocked too! But it's true. Keep at it and keep trying to go bigger. You're talented.
it's weird having people tell you that you are good and have value
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 20, 2020 10:30 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

TT, I can relate to everything you wrote, except for the stuff with your father and the women offering money for sex. Just know that the feelings will pass. I know that seems impossible at times, but it will. I get the imposter syndrome, too. I've heard so many of the greatest comedians all say the...
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 20, 2020 10:27 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

Giff wrote: Thu Aug 20, 2020 7:48 am I just want to make it clear, my wife and I have not made it out to a show yet.
this made me LOL. to the other question, 1000 bucks to break the sanctity of her marriage.
by TT2.0
Wed Aug 19, 2020 11:06 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Return of Confessions
Replies: 1283
Views: 76579

Re: Return of Confessions

not exactly the type of confession this thread was made for, but I can't really post this in the covid anxiety thread so i'll just change the format of how i write slightly. Confession- I've spent the last week or so fighting suicidal thoughts at an alarming rate. Whats causing you to be so depresse...
by TT2.0
Fri Aug 14, 2020 7:22 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: "You know that's permanent, right?" - The Tattoo Thread
Replies: 188
Views: 7918

Re: "You know that's permanent, right?" - The Tattoo Thread

Giff wrote: Fri Aug 14, 2020 8:04 am That's great TT! Very proud of you, man! I just got a similar tattoo and now bummed I didn't get it in a circle like that.
is it too late to change?
by TT2.0
Thu Aug 13, 2020 11:48 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: "You know that's permanent, right?" - The Tattoo Thread
Replies: 188
Views: 7918

Re: "You know that's permanent, right?" - The Tattoo Thread

my sobriety date in roman numerals...i'm betting a lot on myself not fucking up and making myself a hypocrite. i did it in roman numerals because i didn't really want it to be instantly recognizable as a date. i like it though, i just hope i don't let myself down.
Image
by TT2.0
Thu Jul 30, 2020 9:20 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Replies: 1239
Views: 178511

Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...

I only have audio and a lot of you have heard my stuff before but my set last night at Improv is the best I've ever done. If anyone is bored and wants to listen to it send me an email address or message me on Facebook.

The audio that is me starts about the 1 minute 45 second mark
by TT2.0
Thu Jul 30, 2020 9:17 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook
Replies: 2496
Views: 208210

Re: Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook

I'm usually the last person to advocate restraint but...no.
by TT2.0
Sat Jul 25, 2020 3:05 pm
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread
Replies: 1521
Views: 34766

Re: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread

“One great thing about being this tall is that the only people I could catch COVID from are the Houston Rockets .” [wild applause] “And lucky for me, they’re all in Florida right now!!!” [raucous applause, a commotion that threatens the building’s foundation] “Thank you ladies and gentlemen you’ve ...
by TT2.0
Sat Jul 25, 2020 9:06 am
Forum: The Swamp
Topic: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread
Replies: 1521
Views: 34766

Re: The Captain Trips Anxiety thread

I guess I will post this here because its only sort of Corona related. I have a show wednesday at Houston Improv, and its sold out. I am feeling a whole hell of a lot of pressure to come out and perform well, which sucks because i haven't even gotten to open mic since march. I'm going to be rusty wi...