Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook

rass · Post by **rass** » Wed Aug 14, 2013 5:01 pm

P.D.X. wrote:Disappointment of the day: Ordered pad gai, spicy, on account of being stuffed up from a lingering cold. Get home and open it up to find fried rice instead. WTF? Of all the items to get my order mixed up with, it had to be that. RICE IS NOT A MEAL.

They should just wind up and kick you in the guy veggies instead. Jeez.

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Wed Aug 14, 2013 5:14 pm

RIght? They also gave me a couple of salad rolls because the wait was long. That was cool until I realized they gave me nothing to dip them in. Was like eating a fistful of lettuce.

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Wed Aug 14, 2013 5:23 pm

P.D.X. wrote:RIght? They also gave me a couple of salad rolls because the wait was long. That was cool until I realized they gave me nothing to dip them in. Was like eating a fistful of lettuce.

ETA: No idea why I posted this in the FB thread.

rass · Post by **rass** » Wed Aug 14, 2013 5:43 pm

P.D.X. wrote:
P.D.X. wrote:RIght? They also gave me a couple of salad rolls because the wait was long. That was cool until I realized they gave me nothing to dip them in. Was like eating a fistful of lettuce.
ETA: No idea why I posted this in the FB thread.

Yeah, I wasn't sure if you were lodging your own complaint or making fun of someone else bitching on FB. In the end I figured it didn't matter.

TT2.0 · Post by **TT2.0** » Mon Aug 19, 2013 5:21 pm

BSF21 wrote:
Icepenis wrote:Ok, joined the group. I'm going to lay low and then in a month, unless SC tells me not to because he loves Grand Junction's majestic hills and fertile valleys, I'm going to thank everybody for joining my group.
Ahhh pulling the old TT on NHA's old board huh?

obligatory that was a terrible idea that did not end well for us.

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Mon Aug 19, 2013 9:58 pm

A friend who works at a resort in Steamboat posted this gem, which they received in the mail today.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 2:58 am

The absolutely most annoying thing in the history of ever with regards to Christians is their abundant use of unnecessary capitalization of words that aren't proper nouns or sentence beginners.

Put down the Bible and read a fucking book on the English language every once in a while. Fahk. And 4th generation Texan? Because your lineage is so much better than everyone else's.

Man, if I were a decent writer I'd write a rebuttal.

tennbengal · Post by **tennbengal** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 6:47 am

Which reminds me...just who are the Founding Principals?

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 7:17 am

As a Colorado native, I had to chuckle at that note. With apologies to Giff and TT, I can safely say that the most common prejudice held by Coloradoans is against Texans. Generally held to be loud, obnoxious and poorly behaved tourists. When I told my friends years ago that I was moving from Denver to Dallas, I received many, many incredulous replies, of, "you're moving, WHERE?"

Of course, now I live in California - the state that is the regarded in second-lowest esteem by the natives, there. But, for the rest of you - it's all good.

ZMan · Post by **ZMan** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 8:26 am

Well, how dare Colorado not hide the gay and the pot away whilst Texans are visiting.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 9:21 am

You can take our names of the mailing list. Or you can leave them on. It's your call, really.

Scottie · Post by **Scottie** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 10:29 am

I'm not really up on the latest fads but I'll assume that a "love steamboat" is some sort of unusual sex act involving poop.

Shrew · Post by **Shrew** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 11:07 am

tennbengal wrote:Which reminds me...just who are the Founding Principals?

Skinner and Super Nintendo Chalmers

TT2.0 · Post by **TT2.0** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 12:46 pm

sancarlos wrote:As a Colorado native, I had to chuckle at that note. With apologies to Giff and TT, I can safely say that the most common prejudice held by Coloradoans is against Texans. Generally held to be loud, obnoxious and poorly behaved tourists. When I told my friends years ago that I was moving from Denver to Dallas, I received many, many incredulous replies, of, "you're moving, WHERE?"

Of course, now I live in California - the state that is the regarded in second-lowest esteem by the natives, there. But, for the rest of you - it's all good.

no apologies necessary. Texas should probably apologize for itself a little more often. If I lived in the Texas-y part of Texas instead of the ghetto, filled with gorgeous black women with huge asses part of Texas i'd probably be a little annoyed too.

Giff · Post by **Giff** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 1:27 pm

No apologies needed here either, even though I'm sure it's overblown and full of stereotypes. I really should just start posting a journal of obnoxious assholes I meet either on my travels or who happen to come to Texas, cause I can assure you we're not the only blowhards.

This is all from someone who cannot see what was posted in the first place thanks to work filters.

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Tue Aug 20, 2013 5:40 pm

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Wed Aug 21, 2013 7:45 am

Scottie wrote:I'm not really up on the latest fads but I'll assume that a "love steamboat" is some sort of unusual sex act involving poop.

It's so much hotter in print.

Plus, you can win Seattle [strikethrough]Steamboat[/no more strikethrough] Sounders tickets.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Wed Aug 21, 2013 10:13 am

Not sure if this counts, but as i am neither Christian, Muslim or Gay, I have to wonder why I constantly get ads touting dating services and themed cruises that are aimed for members of these three groups.

Methinks Facebook's targeted marketing algorithims need a bit of work.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Wed Aug 21, 2013 10:46 am

Pruitt wrote:Not sure if this counts, but as i am neither Christian, Muslim or Gay, I have to wonder why I constantly get ads touting dating services and themed cruises that are aimed for members of these three groups.

Methinks Facebook's targeted marketing algorithims need a bit of work.

ChristianMingle.com - Because with Jesus, you're always having a threesome.

Post by **Shirley** » Wed Aug 21, 2013 11:35 am

Pruitt wrote:Not sure if this counts, but as i am neither Christian, Muslim or Gay, I have to wonder why I constantly get ads touting dating services and themed cruises that are aimed for members of these three groups.

Methinks Facebook's targeted marketing algorithims need a bit of work.

No, they're just throwing bait out there, waiting for you to pick one. Then they'll know.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Thu Aug 22, 2013 1:51 am

A friend of mine went out to eat and happened to sit at the table next to the Honey Boo Boo clan. She posted a pic on FB. All of her friends were like "OMG! That show is so funny! Mama June is looking better after losing weight!"

I'm feeling nothing but rage. I really don't want to be the guy who goes apeshit on her wall, but I feel I need to do humanity a favor and apologize to her later.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Mon Aug 26, 2013 8:36 am

Was too pissed off to post yesterday. I don't care if it is preseason game, fuck losing to the saints. also, I don't think i've ever hated a texans player as much as I hate kareem jackson. He does not want to see me in the parking lot at reliant.

Our very own TT is going to fight a Texans player in the parking lot over a preseason football game.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Mon Aug 26, 2013 12:25 pm

I was dying when I read that too.

Post by **brian** » Mon Aug 26, 2013 12:32 pm

I wish I cared about anything as much as TT cares about preseason football.

TT2.0 · Post by **TT2.0** » Wed Aug 28, 2013 1:10 am

Gunpowder wrote:
Was too pissed off to post yesterday. I don't care if it is preseason game, fuck losing to the saints. also, I don't think i've ever hated a texans player as much as I hate kareem jackson. He does not want to see me in the parking lot at reliant.
Our very own TT is going to fight a Texans player in the parking lot over a preseason football game.

fight? fuck no. I weigh 140. Shoot. This is Texas. Always shoot.

Tom 1860 · Post by **Tom 1860** » Wed Aug 28, 2013 3:57 am

TT2.0 wrote:
Gunpowder wrote:
Was too pissed off to post yesterday. I don't care if it is preseason game, fuck losing to the saints. also, I don't think i've ever hated a texans player as much as I hate kareem jackson. He does not want to see me in the parking lot at reliant.
Our very own TT is going to fight a Texans player in the parking lot over a preseason football game.
fight? fuck no. I weigh 140. Shoot. This is Texas. Always shoot.

I am pretty sure that it is illegal to threaten to shoot someone, even if you are writing the post, while living in Texas...

Brontoburglar · Post by **Brontoburglar** » Wed Aug 28, 2013 8:45 am

do we need to start a "things beyond ridiculous you read on Facebook" thread?

TT2.0 · Post by **TT2.0** » Wed Aug 28, 2013 10:41 am

TT2.0 wrote:
Gunpowder wrote:
Was too pissed off to post yesterday. I don't care if it is preseason game, fuck losing to the saints. also, I don't think i've ever hated a texans player as much as I hate kareem jackson. He does not want to see me in the parking lot at reliant.

I am pretty sure that it is illegal to threaten to shoot someone, even if you are writing the post, while living in Texas...

good lord. if I can't even joke about shooting subpar db's on the swamp, i don't need to be here anymore. Thats practically a hug compared to what i used to write about reggie bush.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Fri Sep 06, 2013 9:44 am

The other day, I posted something about Bill Nye being on DWTS with some science analogies about how I hate it. Anyway, some girl says, "I'm repulsed like electrons repel protons."

Not a huge deal of course but a little embarrassing since she's the frickin' chair of a high school science department.

ZMan · Post by **ZMan** » Fri Sep 06, 2013 2:09 pm

I only have one word for you J-Lo....

SHAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Fri Sep 06, 2013 2:45 pm

It's so much more intimidating on paper.

Post by **Sabo** » Thu Sep 26, 2013 3:33 pm

Jerloma wrote:The other day, I posted something about Bill Nye being on DWTS with some science analogies about how I hate it. Anyway, some girl says, "I'm repulsed like electrons repel protons."

Speaking of Mr. Nye, he was hurt during tapings of "Dancing with the Stars".

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Thu Sep 26, 2013 6:29 pm

Sabo wrote:
Jerloma wrote:The other day, I posted something about Bill Nye being on DWTS with some science analogies about how I hate it. Anyway, some girl says, "I'm repulsed like electrons repel protons."
Speaking of Mr. Nye, he was hurt during tapings of "Dancing with the Stars".

I decided to look up Bill Nye's partner. Nice work.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Fri Sep 27, 2013 8:30 am

She got docked a ton of points in the "stand like a regular human" portion of the challenge.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Fri Sep 27, 2013 9:59 am

She has kind of a weird bum, no?

rass · Post by **rass** » Fri Sep 27, 2013 10:17 am

Jerloma wrote:She has kind of a weird bum, no?

howard · Post by **howard** » Fri Sep 27, 2013 11:00 am

J-lo, that's called a glute. It's not just a fat pad--it's a muscle too!

Aw, fudgit. Rass' retort was better. As usual.

Brontoburglar · Post by **Brontoburglar** » Fri Sep 27, 2013 12:37 pm

It's some impressive lumbar flexion

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Fri Sep 27, 2013 1:41 pm

Brontoburglar wrote:It's some impressive lumbar flexion

That's just a fancy term for weird bum.

Brontoburglar · Post by **Brontoburglar** » Fri Sep 27, 2013 3:09 pm

Jerloma wrote:
Brontoburglar wrote:It's some impressive lumbar flexion
That's just a fancy term for weird bum.

nah, it's just what's making her butt look weird.