The Random Rankings Thread

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu Aug 04, 2016 1:18 pm

1. Chives
2. Scallions

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Thu Aug 04, 2016 2:18 pm

Care for a Fresca?

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Mon Feb 20, 2017 11:27 am

Monopoly tokens, ranked:

1. race car
2. Scottie dog
3. battleship
4. cowboy
5. top hat
6. wheelbarrow
7. shoe
8. iron
9. being molested by the Monopoly guy
10. thimble

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 11:25 am

College Basketball Teams, Ranked by How Good of a First Name for a Dog They Make

1. Furman
2. Duke
3. Stetson
4. Samford
5. Marshall
6. Siena
7. Liberty
8. Lehigh
9. Xavier
T10. Dayton
T10. Creighton
12. Rider
13. Cornell
14. Stetson
15. Austin Peay
16. Lamar
17. Navy
18. Army
19. Elon
20. Drexel
21. LaSalle
22. Rice
23. Baylor
24. Butler
25. George Mason
26. George Washington
27. Winthrop
28. Yale
29. Bethune-Cookman
30. Bucknell
...
...
117. Troy
...
...
198. Hofstra
...
...
250-260. Most of the Cal States
...
...
349. Incarnate Word
350. Brown
351. Lipscomb

L-Jam3 · Post by **L-Jam3** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 11:51 am

You must really like Stetson.

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 11:54 am

Terrible name for anything except a dog and a Texas Tech QB

EDIT: Oh. That second one should be Drake

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 11:56 am

L-Jam3 wrote:You must really like Stetson.

#3 and #14 should be reversed.

Lamar is under-ranked.

DSafetyGuy · Post by **DSafetyGuy** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 2:43 pm

My niece has a dog named Creighton.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 2:55 pm

Could also be how much they sound like the name of a racist cop.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 4:41 pm

Wracking my brain trying to think of a single Canadian school with a good dog name.

McGill?
Laurentien?
Carleton?
University of Prince Edward Island?

Best I could come up with was Mohawk.

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 4:49 pm

Pruitt wrote:Wracking my brain trying to think of a single Canadian school with a good dog name.

McGill?
Laurentien?
Carleton?
University of Prince Edward Island?

Best I could come up with was Mohawk.

Paw Patrol could use a RCMP presence

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Thu Mar 16, 2017 6:41 pm

Ryan wrote:
Pruitt wrote:Wracking my brain trying to think of a single Canadian school with a good dog name.

McGill?
Laurentien?
Carleton?
University of Prince Edward Island?

Best I could come up with was Mohawk.

Paw Patrol could use a RCMP presence

True, but dogs can't ride horses.

And of relevance to your list, there is a Marshall. But no Elon.

wlu_lax6 · Post by **wlu_lax6** » Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:27 am

Pruitt wrote:
Ryan wrote:
Pruitt wrote:Wracking my brain trying to think of a single Canadian school with a good dog name.

McGill?
Laurentien?
Carleton?
University of Prince Edward Island?

Best I could come up with was Mohawk.

Paw Patrol could use a RCMP presence
True, but dogs can't ride horses.

And of relevance to your list, there is a Marshall. But no Elon.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_c ... _in_Canada
Ambrose
Bow Valley College (seems like something off the Bow)
Keyano College
Reeves College
Robertson College
Alexander College
Ashton College
Brighton College
Herzing College
Mitt (Manitoba Institute of Trades and Technology)
Oulton College
McKenzie College (Nova Scotia)
George Brown College
Fleming College
Seneca College
Sheridan College

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:32 am

Most of those are community college type places (of which I'd never heard).

I should have included Humber where I teach.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:35 am

wlu_lax6 wrote: Keyano College
Reeves College

wlu_lax6 · Post by **wlu_lax6** » Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:38 am

Pruitt wrote:Most of those are community college type places (of which I'd never heard).

I should have included Humber where I teach.

Simon Fraser? They have a good lacrosse team (plays in the US Virtual Varsity Club League). So you know they will chase balls very well.

McMaster? Brock? Windsor? York? Wilfrid Laurier?

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:57 pm

Pruitt wrote:Most of those are community college type places (of which I'd never heard).

I should have included Humber where I teach.

Anti-Arsenal bias?

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Tue May 09, 2017 8:50 am

Hats, ranked by increasing likelihood the wearer is an asshole:

13. flat cap
12. baseball cap
11. beanie
10. bucket hat
9. cowboy hat
8. outback hat
7. boater hat
6. fedora
5. visor
4. beret
3. yacht captain's hat
2. SS officer's cap
1. pork pie

Post by **Sabo** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:00 am

Cowboy hats are ranked way, way too low. They should be two or three. Flat cap is a clearcut one, though.

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:01 am

Sabo wrote:Cowboy hats are ranked way, way too low. They should be two or three. Flat cap is a clearcut one, though.

The top is the least likely.

Post by **Sabo** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:02 am

Then this list is severely flawed.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:05 am

Ryan wrote:
Sabo wrote:Cowboy hats are ranked way, way too low. They should be two or three. Flat cap is a clearcut one, though.
The top is the least likely.

Increasing likelihood that the wearer is an asshole. That means #1 is the most likely that the wearer is an asshole.

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:05 am

I can see it that way too, but then explain #12

wlu_lax6 · Post by **wlu_lax6** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:08 am

Johnny Carwash wrote:Hats, ranked by increasing likelihood the wearer is an asshole:

1. flat cap
2. baseball cap
3. beanie
4. bucket hat
5. cowboy hat
6. outback hat
7. boater hat
8. fedora
9. visor
10. beret
11. yacht captain's hat
12. SS officer's cap
13. pork pie

This is lacking in several factors
1.) Construction helmet designed to look like NFL football helmet
2.) Baseball cap is way to generic
**** Camo baseball cap
**** Camo baseball cap with fishing hook on brim
**** Trucker hat
3.) Elmer Fudd style winter
4.) Silly winter ski hat (really long long stocking style or crazy "Mad Bomber" hat)
3.) What about winter beanine hat in the summer?
5.) What about under Armour head cover?
6.) Visor with Guy Fieri fake hair coming out the top?
7.) No Kangol style/Ivy (are they different if you were the Kangol forward or backward? or are driving a classic british convertible while wearing one)
8.) Are you grouping Trilby and Fedora?
9.) Ushanka/Russia Winter turban?
10.) Military Patrol Hat? w/ w/out Che buttons?
11.) Boater? Do you get a different vote if this is not paired with Seer Sucker or light summer suit?
12.) Sombrero? Extra Large Novelty Sombrero
13.) Cycling cap? Worse if not on bike (yes I am talking about you Sidney Deane).

Post by **Sabo** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:15 am

This is contextual Swampcrash revisited.

wlu_lax6 · Post by **wlu_lax6** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:20 am

and of course a preppy Caucasian wearing this

or guy at the back yard grill with a chef hat

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue May 09, 2017 9:26 am

Toque - indoors or when it's over 50 degrees outside.

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Tue May 09, 2017 10:44 am

Johnny Carwash wrote:Hats, ranked by increasing likelihood the wearer is an asshole:

1. flat cap
2. baseball cap
3. beanie
4. bucket hat
5. cowboy hat
6. outback hat
7. boater hat
8. fedora
9. visor
10. beret
11. yacht captain's hat
12. SS officer's cap
13. pork pie

I can claim the top 3 spots. (Or do bald guys get a pass?)

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Tue May 09, 2017 10:58 am

Realized my wording was kind of unclear so went back and numbered in reverse to show that the bottom of the list is in fact the bad part. Figured the placement of the SS cap would make that apparent, but there you go.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Tue May 09, 2017 12:07 pm

Pruitt wrote:Toque - indoors or when it's over 50 degrees outside.

I admit I would probably do this a lot more often if it didn't make my head warm. If I don't shower, my hair is unfixable so I need to wear something and sometimes I just don't feel like a baseball cap.

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Tue May 09, 2017 12:20 pm

Pruitt wrote:Toque - indoors or when it's over 50 degrees outside.

American kids call them beanies. Carwash ranked it #11.

Personally, I think Carwash's list is pretty accurate.

L-Jam3 · Post by **L-Jam3** » Tue May 09, 2017 12:24 pm

wlu_lax6 wrote:and of course a preppy Caucasian wearing this

or guy at the back yard grill with a chef hat

Unless you're cosplaying as Raiden, why the fuck would any white guy wear this?

wlu_lax6 · Post by **wlu_lax6** » Tue May 09, 2017 12:29 pm

kayaking?

music festival

hanging out on chairs by mountain lake

I played lacrosse with Kavu's owner when I lived in Seattle. Really good guy. Love some of his products but don't know about this hat though.

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Tue Aug 01, 2017 10:18 am

State Highway Signs, Ranked by Awesomeness

1. New Mexico (by a mile)
2. Washington
3. Kansas
4. Colorado
5. North Dakota (the stupid ND knocked it down 2 spots)
6. New York (just always liked the shape)
7. California
8. New Hampshire
9. Utah
10. Wyoming (again with the name - we all know what state we're in now)

Honorable Mention: South Carolina, South Dakota, Oregon, Alaska, Michigan, Pennsylvania, Guam

54. Alabama (if you have to distort the shape of your state to make it fit, you're worse than plain rectangles)

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Tue Aug 01, 2017 10:40 am

Zias for life. And the drive is enjoyable in New Mexico as well.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Tue Aug 01, 2017 10:48 am

Wonder how many of the New Mexico signs have been riddled with bullets based on their passing resemblance to a target.

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Tue Aug 01, 2017 10:50 am

The Utah beehive is pretty awesome. I've always liked the Colorado state flag.

Giff · Post by **Giff** » Tue Aug 01, 2017 11:47 am

Our state highway signs are awful, but Farm to Market signs are awesome.

Post by **brian** » Tue Aug 01, 2017 11:52 am

There is one Michigan state highway that doesn't have the block M.

(And if you want to go down a rabbit hole of insanity find a thread on a Michigan State fan message board complaining about the block Ms in the state highway signs.)

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Wed Oct 25, 2017 11:05 am

Rivalry trophies in the D-III Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference, ranked

1. The Troll (Concordia-St Olaf)
2. The Book of Knowledge (Carleton-Macalester)
3. The Holy Grail (St Johns-St Thomas)
4. The Power Bowl (Concordia-MSU Moorehead)
5. The Goat Trophy (Carleton-St Olaf)
6. The Hammer (Augsburg-Hamline)
7. The Old Paint Bucket (Macalester-Hamline)