Farts

Okay . . . let's try this again.

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Shirley
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Farts

Post by Shirley »

Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »

When you're right, you're right.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Farts

Post by Sabo »

Birds don’t suck. They lack the necessary anatomical structures to do so.
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Re: Farts

Post by Shirley »

That video never gets old.
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Re: Farts

Post by Johnnie »

I can clear out a room. Mine have gotten worse with age.
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Re: Farts

Post by Pruitt »

Johnnie wrote:I can clear out a room. Mine have gotten worse with age.
I reached a point about ten years ago when my own farts made me want to vomit. That must be a true sign of aging,.
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »

Pruitt wrote:
Johnnie wrote:I can clear out a room. Mine have gotten worse with age.
I reached a point about ten years ago when my own farts made me want to vomit. That must be a true sign of aging,.
So unfair. The day that happens, I'm printing out the "Random thoughts/images/shit that makes you feel old" thread and choking on it.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Farts

Post by Pruitt »

rass wrote:
Pruitt wrote:
Johnnie wrote:I can clear out a room. Mine have gotten worse with age.
I reached a point about ten years ago when my own farts made me want to vomit. That must be a true sign of aging,.
So unfair. The day that happens, I'm printing out the "Random thoughts/images/shit that makes you feel old" thread and choking on it.
Washroom smells are one of the main reasons that passion goes out of a relationship.
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Re: Farts

Post by A_B »

Pruitt wrote:
rass wrote:
Pruitt wrote:
Johnnie wrote:I can clear out a room. Mine have gotten worse with age.
I reached a point about ten years ago when my own farts made me want to vomit. That must be a true sign of aging,.
So unfair. The day that happens, I'm printing out the "Random thoughts/images/shit that makes you feel old" thread and choking on it.
Washroom smells are one of the main reasons that passion goes out of a relationship.
Right up there with calling it a washroom, I expect.
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Re: Farts

Post by DSafetyGuy »

The phrase "I once got busy in a Burger King washroom" certainly lacks something.
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Re: Farts

Post by sancarlos »

DSafetyGuy wrote:The phrase "I once got busy in a Burger King washroom" certainly lacks something.
Sounds like DSG has a story for us.

I never felt so American as I did the day, years ago, when a couple of my Canadian cousins chided me for saying bathroom instead of washroom.
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Re: Farts

Post by A_B »

sancarlos wrote:
DSafetyGuy wrote:The phrase "I once got busy in a Burger King washroom" certainly lacks something.
Sounds like DSG has a story for us.
This is so so good.
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »

A_B wrote:
sancarlos wrote:
DSafetyGuy wrote:The phrase "I once got busy in a Burger King washroom" certainly lacks something.
Sounds like DSG has a story for us.
This is so so good.
This thread is a roller coaster.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Farts

Post by Pruitt »

sancarlos wrote:
DSafetyGuy wrote:The phrase "I once got busy in a Burger King washroom" certainly lacks something.
Sounds like DSG has a story for us.

I never felt so American as I did the day, years ago, when a couple of my Canadian cousins chided me for saying bathroom instead of washroom.
I have now been corrected on this three times in my life. Once in Boston when I was a teenager, once when I submitted a script which had a scene in a "washroom," and just now.

But when you think about it, "washroom" makes a lot more sense than "bathroom." Because (in theory), a person always washes when in that room, but not all of the rooms have a bath.

Now, should we talk about the odours that are present in a washroom?
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Re: Farts

Post by mister d »

Toiletroom.
Johnnie wrote: Sat Sep 10, 2022 8:13 pmOh shit, you just reminded me about toilet paper.
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Re: Farts

Post by Pruitt »

mister d wrote:Toiletroom.
Interestingly, the French call it either a "room of baths" or a "toilet."
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »

I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »

I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Farts

Post by EnochRoot »

...are like snowflakes. No two are quite the same.
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Re: Farts

Post by L-Jam3 »

I was taught French is "le double-vay ce", short for "water closet"... which in that case, shouldn't it be "Le Cee d'eau"?
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Re: Farts

Post by Pruitt »

L-Jam3 wrote:I was taught French is "le double-vay ce", short for "water closet"... which in that case, shouldn't it be "Le Cee d'eau"?
In Quebec it was always "toilette" or more formally, "Salle des bains."

Or in drunk company " pissoir"
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Re: Farts

Post by Shirley »

For the more artistically inclined ...

Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Farts

Post by The Sybian »

Pruitt wrote: But when you think about it, "washroom" makes a lot more sense than "bathroom." Because (in theory), a person always washes when in that room, but not all of the rooms have a bath.
That's why I call it the shitter.
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Re: Farts

Post by Pruitt »

Shirley wrote:For the more artistically inclined ...

God help me, that is so funny.
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »

Ha. Bump!
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »



h/t square rob
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Re: Farts

Post by Shirley »

Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Farts

Post by Shirley »

Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Farts

Post by P.D.X. »

tifu?
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Re: Farts

Post by Johnnie »

"Today I fucked up"

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Re: Farts

Post by Shirley »

Reddit-speak for Think I Fucked Up.

I'm not sure why the post was removed. The gist is that this guy's buddy emailed him a recorded fart and tricked him into playing it at work. To get the guy back, he recorded every morning fart for a year. After sending it to his coworker, he accidentally then sent it to everyone in his company.
Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Farts

Post by Shirley »

Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Farts

Post by Shirley »

So my in-laws were visiting this weekend. Yesterday, I walked into the family room to where my son was working on a school project and I heard him releasing a low, rumbling fart that didn't seem to end. After a couple of seconds, I was just going to admonish him for doing that in front of his grandparents, when my mother-in-law chimed in "ooh, excuse me <nervous laugh>." The fart continued through her apology and then for another couple of seconds. Never heard anything like it.

Impressively, nobody in the family laughed, although I had to excuse myself to go out on the balcony for a few minutes. My wife told my son later how proud she was of him for not laughing - and then we all laughed for about 10 minutes.
Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Farts

Post by Giff »

Farts will never be not funny.
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Re: Farts

Post by rass »

bump
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Farts

Post by bfj »

Littlest BFJ's bus drops him at my office every day after school. He and I were taking the elevator down to the garage where I park and clearly the person who had gotten off the floor before us had some very serious GI distress. It was the longest flight down two stories, ever. My kid was cracking up the whole time. He then proceeds to tell the story of the gross elevator to his brother and his mother, while cracking up. This is my son with autism and communication isn't his strong suit. For him to be able to tell a story, in order, without taking breaks to come up with the right words is quite a feat for him. All it took was a guy/woman possibly shitting themselves in the elevator to bring it out in him.
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Re: Farts

Post by Giff »

bfj wrote:Littlest BFJ's bus drops him at my office every day after school. He and I were taking the elevator down to the garage where I park and clearly the person who had gotten off the floor before us had some very serious GI distress. It was the longest flight down two stories, ever. My kid was cracking up the whole time. He then proceeds to tell the story of the gross elevator to his brother and his mother, while cracking up. This is my son with autism and communication isn't his strong suit. For him to be able to tell a story, in order, without taking breaks to come up with the right words is quite a feat for him. All it took was a guy/woman possibly shitting themselves in the elevator to bring it out in him.


Farts are amazing. Great story.
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
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Re: Farts

Post by sancarlos »

It sounds like you really earned that happy story.
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Re: Farts

Post by Pruitt »

That is amazing and absolutely hysterical.
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Re: Farts

Post by brian »

Bump
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