Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Final Countdown

Okay . . . let's try this again.

Moderators: Shirley, Sabo, brian, rass, DaveInSeattle

Best moment of Swampvilles I-V

howard dies due to lack of medical attention
0
No votes
BSF accidentally shoots and kills wlu_lax
1
6%
everything Marshmallow
1
6%
sancarlos pecked to death by an emu
1
6%
Johnnie lets Gunpowder and Ryan burn to death
0
No votes
degen's mom makes a sculpture of degen humping a capybara
4
25%
Swamp votes to let Moreta get eaten by wolves, but she survives
3
19%
bfj's sculptures as a collected oeuvre
6
38%
 
Total votes: 16

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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Rush2112 »

bfj wrote:
Everyone now has their own rooms, including bfj whose room includes his self-portrait sculpture, which should keep him happy.
That's a lot of clay.
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Did you see that ludicrous display last night?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - New Poll: Choose Pet

Post by DSafetyGuy »

Johnny Carwash wrote:This left him incapable of communicating outside of grunts and crude body language, though he is able to perform most basic labor functions. In other words, he is a Teamster.
This killed me.
Johnny Carwash wrote:People especially like DSafe because he is pretty.
This will probably kill my character.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - New Poll: Choose Pet

Post by Johnny Carwash »

rass wrote:Blimp needs to sleep in chedda's room.

What is that little thing asleep in the other set of beds on the right?
It's a wild boar. Wild animals will sometimes self-domesticate and join the colony. I created a sleeping spot for Blimp, but you can't assign it to a specific animal the way you can a human bed.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

So we just rescued a colonist who looks like this. I'm drawing a blank on which Swamper we should say this is. Any suggestions? Note: it's a guy.

Image
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by P.D.X. »

Is that his dingus?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

No, he has a bleeding wound as a result of crash landing in an escape pod. Does that affect your answer?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by BSF21 »

Johnny Carwash wrote:No, he has a bleeding wound as a result of crash landing in an escape pod. Does that affect your answer?
Which one of us dinguses...dingi??...got whacked with a car a couple years ago? Or is that still a sore subject?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by bfj »

BSF21 wrote:
Johnny Carwash wrote:No, he has a bleeding wound as a result of crash landing in an escape pod. Does that affect your answer?
Which one of us dinguses...dingi??...got whacked with a car a couple years ago? Or is that still a sore subject?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Nonlinear FC »

Carwash - I just want to say, so that it's fully on record: A huge part of why this shit is so entertaining is the narrative. I know this is probably obvious, but as someone who communicates/writes for a living, even though I know I'm awesome, it's nice to be validated.

This shit is just highly entertaining.

Also, I like when other dudes ask questions. I will try to ask more.. I often don't really understand what I'm seeing in the illustrations.

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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by EnochRoot »

Just wanted to chime in that I'd been hording a shit ton of that cocaine we scored a few pages back. I mean, the kill count suffered, but damn it still felt good to be a gangster.
Last edited by EnochRoot on Fri Jan 06, 2017 8:42 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

The raid alarm sounds, but it's just one attacker: a woman named Thrasher Lacey, rushing at our settlement armed only with a knife. And wait, she's DC47's sister! We send DC along with Bronto to defend. Will familial bonds prevent DC from engaging in violence?

Image
Uh, no--he shoots her dead as soon as she is in range. DC's mood takes a negative hit as a result of having killed his sister, but this is offset by having attended a party recently.

An escape pod crashes and it's Brian's mother! Her name is Nails. She was put under cryogenic sleep long ago and so is biologically only 25 years old. She is mentally strong, skilled in combat, and is a pyromaniac.

Soon after, another escape pod lands. Hey look, it's steve!

Image
steve, whose last name I will assume is "Perry" based on his hair, spent his youth digging tunnels on a subterranean cave world. This made him good at mining and absolutely nothing else. He exhibits strong resistance to psychic phenomena thanks to his stupidity. He is an optimist and is gay.

In his down time, bfj completes more statues, including:
- Bronto "smacking and spitting into the face" of a captive raider (seriously, either Bronto has some issues, or bfj does)
- Bronto riding in an escape pod while an accountant watches in the background
- an empty necktie seen through a looking glass
- a village "with a pop art feeling" and a fly "symbolizing loneliness"
- DSafe buying goods from a trader while the disembodied head of a gardener watches on
- a sculpture shaped like a rock (is this Dadaist?)
- a "thirsty valley" (he made this one while high)
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Image
Oh shit, DSafe is attacked by a ferocious timber wolf! DSafe has an Uzi, but the wolf has closed the distance and mauls him until he collapses. The others rush from all directions in an attempt to save him. Rush is first to the scene. Oh, I should mention at this point that I had forgotten that Rush lost his right eye earlier in a fight with raiders. Anyway, Rush carefully takes aim with his rifle and...

Image
...accidentally hits DSafe, killing him! Rush and a few others take down the wolf shortly thereafter but it's too late. RIP DSafe, at least it wasn't your prettiness that got you killed. Steve gets his room.

Interpret this as you may, but immediately after DSafe dies, a cargo pod full of space-pot falls from the sky.

As a result of his accidentally killing DSafe, some of the others now dislike Rush, but not as much as they dislike him for having only one eye.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by tennbengal »

Holy shit, but I am stuck on BFJ's sculpting. If a sculpter here IRL could do those kinds of pieces, he'd/she'd be a billionairre, right?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by rass »

Footage of Steve's crash:
Image
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by A_B »

tennbengal wrote:Holy shit, but I am stuck on BFJ's sculpting. If a sculpter here IRL could do those kinds of pieces, he'd/she'd be a billionairre, right?

It's all fun and games until the Lonely Flies Cult storm our camp, making the fly statue a harbinger.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by bapo! »

DSafe, I know that you're probably disappointed to be shot by friendly fire while fighting a wolf, but there is a positive in all of this: you'll get the last-place schedule next season. All of your non-division games will be against other early-diers like me. (Well, except for your traditional home-and-home vs. Syracuse.)

One of these years, I'm going to live long enough to qualify for Swampville Champions League. Right now, I'm just stocking up on draft picks. Or space pot, or whatever.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

tennbengal wrote:Holy shit, but I am stuck on BFJ's sculpting. If a sculpter here IRL could do those kinds of pieces, he'd/she'd be a billionairre, right?
FWIW, we've sold bfj's sculptures for a total of about $2500 so far. So...maybe?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by DSafetyGuy »

bapo! wrote:DSafe, I know that you're probably disappointed to be shot by friendly fire while fighting a wolf, but there is a positive in all of this: you'll get the last-place schedule next season. All of your non-division games will be against other early-diers like me. (Well, except for your traditional home-and-home vs. Syracuse.)

One of these years, I'm going to live long enough to qualify for Swampville Champions League. Right now, I'm just stocking up on draft picks. Or space pot, or whatever.
I just hope that, as punishment for shooting me, the remaining survivors don't allow rush to enjoy space-pot.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by tennbengal »

Johnny Carwash wrote:
tennbengal wrote:Holy shit, but I am stuck on BFJ's sculpting. If a sculpter here IRL could do those kinds of pieces, he'd/she'd be a billionairre, right?
FWIW, we've sold bfj's sculptures for a total of about $2500 so far. So...maybe?
I assume the conversion ratio is $500 dollars in Rimworld equals $200,000,000 in real life, so, spot on...
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Rush2112 »

DSafetyGuy wrote:
I just hope that, as punishment for shooting me, the remaining survivors don't allow rush to enjoy space-pot.
I was shooting with one eye! I might have glaucoma in the other...I need my weed!

Did you see that ludicrous display last night?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by DC47 »

Uh, no--he shoots her dead as soon as she is in range. DC's mood takes a negative hit as a result of having killed his sister, but this is offset by having attended a party recently.
No big. I might have more sisters.

Party? Eff that. People are extraneous to my purpose. They harsh my mellow. Might all die tonight.

Blimp's not so bad though. Here boy! Bring DC all the spacepot.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Image
The pirates from The Nutty Lineup are back, four of them this time and well armed. We decide to let them come to us. They make the mistake of splitting up, allowing us to concentrate firepower on the one at a time.

Image
First up is this dumbass trying to knock through the wall of our living room. DC, Shirley, and Bronto pop out and blow him away.

Image
We try to sneak up behind this guy, but we aren't fast enough and have to bear down for a firefight. Brian takes a bullet that destroys his left kidney, but will be OK. Chedda and Steve pop through a side door and drop the raider from close range. The last two flee.

Image
With the battle over, bfj and chedda engage in some stress reduction activities.

And with that we're caught up. I might pop in on the weekend if a major decision point comes up, but otherwise will be back Monday.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by govmentchedda »

All's well that ends well.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by brian »

Short one kidney, just like my dog.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Nonlinear FC »

What's up with Blimp? Is that a hole in his side?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Gunpowder »

The negative mood for killing his sister being mellowed by DC's having recently attended a party is probably the best part yet. This is awesome. Echo Nonlinear's post earlier. This is a damn work of performance art, JC.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - New Poll: Choose Pet

Post by Gunpowder »

bfj wrote:
Johnnie wrote:
govmentchedda wrote:Good thing I boned ... GPJ before I ... Rim.
Editing never gets old to me.

Fuck yeah, you gotta clean up after yourself bro
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by rass »

I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by P.D.X. »

Are they going through their wardrobes while smoking space spliffs?
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Another "which Swamper should we say this is?" encounter. Let me know your suggestions:

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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by rass »

If you're open to retreads, the grey hair and teal screams sancarlos.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnnie »

rass wrote:If you're open to retreads, the grey hair and teal screams sancarlos.
Yup.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Alright, I'll try to work in the "sancarlos survived the emu attack and came back looking more like his real-life self" narrative as best as I can.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnny Carwash »

One more. Who's this guy?

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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by A_B »

Tall and thin. The absent TT.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Shirley »

P.D.X. wrote:Are they going through their wardrobes while smoking space spliffs?
My first interpretation was that those were post-coital spliffs, with their clothes scattered around the room.
Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Johnnie »

Shirley wrote:
P.D.X. wrote:Are they going through their wardrobes while smoking space spliffs?
My first interpretation was that those were post-coital spliffs, with their clothes scattered around the room.
Can't it be both? I'm waiting for a motorcycle to show up and they make fun of a Kanye West song.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by Shirley »

rass wrote:
Fantastic
Totally Kafkaesque
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by bfj »

BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Boreal Life

Post by A_B »

That's great.
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