Swamp Wrestling Federation 2021 - Gunpowder vs. GoodKarma (Featuring BFJ and DSafe on the mic!)

Okay . . . let's try this again.

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P.D.X.
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Post by P.D.X. »

1) Corvallis, OR
2) Twilight of the Thunder God, Amon Amarth
3) Christians
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Jerloma
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1. Johnston, RI
2. Mind of a Lunatic, Geto Boys
3. Any Jew will do
And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness. - God
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Johnny Carwash
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Post by Johnny Carwash »

Had figured this would be J-Lo's intro music:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y25stK5ymlA
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rass
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Post by rass »

ha!
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bapo!
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Post by bapo! »

I hate signing up for stuff when I'm a (very) part-timer. But this is how it worked during the territory days. I never stay in one place too long. Just pretend that I've been beating up jabronis in Florida or the Carolinas or wherever. But now I'm back to...job to somebody like Sabo, I guess. It's not glamorous, but somebody has to do it. I'm going to no-sell all of his offense, tho.

Hometown: from parts unknown
Walk-up music: Cannonball Adderly, Somethin' Else
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sancarlos
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Post by sancarlos »

DSafetyGuy wrote:
Sabo wrote:Works for me.

Now, one of you jokers decide to team up with bapo so sabo and I can get our first walkover win in the books already.

Hey, bapo, I'll be your partner if you want, 'cause I know we can take these guys!

For solo stuff:
1. Grand Junction, Colorado
2. Hells Bells, AC/DC
3. Somebody mentioned a Senior Belt, so I'll compete for that.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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bapo!
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sancarlos wrote:Hey, bapo, I'll be your partner if you want, 'cause I know we can take these guys!

It's going to be tough for the production crew to mash Adderly and AC/DC when we walk in together. I tried playing them at the same time on YouTube. Nope.

But that's a minor thing. We can unite over the important stuff, like our shared hatred of all things Sabo!
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sancarlos
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Post by sancarlos »

bapo! wrote:
sancarlos wrote:Hey, bapo, I'll be your partner if you want, 'cause I know we can take these guys!

It's going to be tough for the production crew to mash Adderly and AC/DC when we walk in together. I tried playing them at the same time on YouTube. Nope.

But that's a minor thing. We can unite over the important stuff, like our shared hatred of all things Sabo!

Great! We can use Cannonball for the tag team, and I'll just use the other for any solo matches I get.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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Sabo
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Post by Sabo »

sancarlos wrote:Hey, bapo, I'll be your partner if you want, 'cause I know we can take these guys!


Prepare to bleed. A lot. Seriously, bring pints of blood to the arena with you because you're going to need a transfusion.
Birds don’t suck. They lack the necessary anatomical structures to do so.
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Johnny Carwash
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Post by Johnny Carwash »

Sabo wrote:
sancarlos wrote:Hey, bapo, I'll be your partner if you want, 'cause I know we can take these guys!


Prepare to bleed. A lot. Seriously, bring pints of blood to the arena with you because you're going to need a transfusion.


Coincidence, I just ran a quick test match to see how some of the mechanics will work and DSafe turned sancarlos into a bloody mess after biting his face:

Image
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L-Jam3
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Post by L-Jam3 »

Oh Hell yeah.

1. Washington Twp, NJ
2. Eye of the Tiger
3. And fuck Ryan and his three-day run!
My avatar corresponds on my place in the Swamp posting list with the all-time Home Run list. Number 45 is Paul Konerko with 439.
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DSafetyGuy
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Post by DSafetyGuy »

Johnny Carwash wrote:
Sabo wrote:
sancarlos wrote:Hey, bapo, I'll be your partner if you want, 'cause I know we can take these guys!


Prepare to bleed. A lot. Seriously, bring pints of blood to the arena with you because you're going to need a transfusion.


Coincidence, I just ran a quick test match to see how some of the mechanics will work and DSafe turned sancarlos into a bloody mess after biting his face:

Image


Sancarlos, while the members of Top Talent are neither doctors nor patrons of Holiday Inn Express, we strongly represent placing a significant retainer with a qualified physician of your choosing. Or, perhaps better yet, start your Senior Belt title chase by looking for the assisted living facility that will best be able to help you cope with day-to-day life after your match with us.

Bring your walker to the ring and leave it there. You'll get a stretcher ride out.
“All I'm sayin' is, he comes near me, I'll put him in the wall.”
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sancarlos
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Post by sancarlos »

Somebody's looking to get a walker smashed across his forehead!
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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A_B
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Post by A_B »

I'm gonna break Bronto's L3-L4 spinal discs!
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
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bfj
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Post by bfj »

sancarlos wrote:Somebody's looking to get a walker smashed across his forehead!


You’re gonna fall and NOT be able to get back up! Whoooo!
Last edited by bfj on Wed Nov 22, 2017 12:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
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sancarlos
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Post by sancarlos »

Image
And, bfj, too!
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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Image
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
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duff
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Post by duff »

Anderson, IN
YMCA
Any of you fucks.
To quote both Bruce Prichard and Tony Schiavone, "Fuck Duff Meltzer."
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bfj
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Post by bfj »

sancarlos wrote:Image
And, bfj, too!


I was trying to write dialogue for YOU. You can be the grumpy old man character. Yell “”GET OFF MY LAWN” or “”KIDS THESE DAYS” before your finishing move (The Century Village Special).
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
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sancarlos
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Post by sancarlos »

Ah, my mistake. Good stuff, large tribesman friend.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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bfj
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Post by bfj »

I would love to do a play by play commentary with someone if that could be figured out.
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
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Post by EnochRoot »

Palm Beach (Oasis) Gardens, FL
Hassan I Sabbah

It is written in the soul of the desert
It is written in the signs in the stars
It is written in the sands of the hour-glass
It is written
It is written in the eye of the falcon
It is written in the shade of the scorpion
It is written in the wealth of the sun
It is written
It is written that man's truth is a mirage
It is written that death is an oasis
It is written for all unbelievers
It is written
Noli Timere Messorem
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rass
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Somerset, PA
Gratitude - Beastie Boys
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Johnnie
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Post by Johnnie »

Reveahhhh, MA
Childish Gambino - Bonfire (but the German national anthem when facing BFJ)
Hillary Clinton Power Bottoms
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
TT2.0
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Post by TT2.0 »

texas city texas works
jay-z big pimpin

i challenge bfj to a ladder match because i doubt he can climb.

by the way all of you are welcome for beating mr delawares ass...consider it a gift
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MOTHERFUCKING 2017 WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS!!!
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govmentchedda
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Post by govmentchedda »

Temple Terrace FL
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AB the dismal, and any other wannabe lawyers up in here.
Until everything is less insane, I'm mixing weed with wine.
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bfj
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TT2.0 wrote:texas city texas works
jay-z big pimpin

i challenge bfj to a ladder match because i doubt he can climb.

by the way all of you are welcome for beating mr delawares ass...consider it a gift


My ball bag weighs more than you. I can’t wait to slap you in the figure $3.99 (I don’t pay retail for a figure 4). After that, we should be a tag team called “The Perfect 10” because we would look like the number 10 standing next to each other.
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
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Johnny Carwash
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Came up with a preliminary bracket based on the sign-ups so far. Tried to accommodate the call-outs in the first round matchups as best as possible, though some of you guys were "popular." Filled the gaps with some of the usual Swamp suspects. Might tweak it before starting the matches, probably next week.

[spoiler=VIEW BRACKET]Image[/spoiler]

Also working on a logo that will go on the mat. My graphical skills aren't great, so open to suggestions:

Image
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rass
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I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Sabo
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bfj wrote:My ball bag weighs more than you. I can’t wait to slap you in the figure $3.99 (I don’t pay retail for a figure 4). After that, we should be a tag team called “The Perfect 10” because we would look like the number 10 standing next to each other.


This might be the perfect Swamp post. Bravo.
Birds don’t suck. They lack the necessary anatomical structures to do so.
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L-Jam3
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Post by L-Jam3 »

Me vs. Ched. Nice. Continue the Philly vs. Tampa Lawyer rivalry.
My avatar corresponds on my place in the Swamp posting list with the all-time Home Run list. Number 45 is Paul Konerko with 439.
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wlu_lax6
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Post by wlu_lax6 »

I don't see seed #s in the bracket, but just based on how that usually works out I will assume that means virtual wlu_lax6 is #1 and can stop being grumpy about getting hosed in MVP voting.
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Pruitt
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And they are all "Loser Leaves Town" matches!

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DSafetyGuy
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Post by DSafetyGuy »

Sabo wrote:This might be the perfect Swamp post. Bravo.


I think I now know which heel is eventually going to turn face.
“All I'm sayin' is, he comes near me, I'll put him in the wall.”
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Sabo
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Post by Sabo »

DSafetyGuy wrote:
Sabo wrote:This might be the perfect Swamp post. Bravo.


I think I now know which heel is eventually going to turn face.


Don't care. All I want is $$$.
Birds don’t suck. They lack the necessary anatomical structures to do so.
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Ryan
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Post by Ryan »

I'm cutting all my promos on Twitter and making rass repeat them on the Jumbotron
he’s a fixbking cyborg or some shit. The

holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
Johnnie
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Post by Johnnie »

Gotta post this. Just because.

Image
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EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
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Johnny Carwash
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So for most of you guys, I've come up with a general idea of what your in-game persona will look like. Could use some suggestions for the following:

- duff
- Jerloma
- Bronto
- EnochRoot
- Shirley
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sancarlos
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Post by sancarlos »

Johnny Carwash wrote:So for most of you guys, I've come up with a general idea of what your in-game persona will look like. Could use some suggestions for the following:

- duff
- Jerloma
- Bronto
- EnochRoot
- Shirley

Jerloma should work some sort of anti-religious theme into his persona.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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EnochRoot
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EnochRoot is the man out of time that insist on beating down those who suffer in the current reality.
Noli Timere Messorem
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