Swamp Wrestling Federation 2021 - Gunpowder vs. GoodKarma (Featuring BFJ and DSafe on the mic!)

Okay . . . let's try this again.

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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 1-4

Post by bfj »

Johnnie wrote:
rass wrote:Johnnie showed a lot of guile in his match.

SONIC BOOM.

BFJ was too enamored by the ice cream and doughnuts sponsorships to deal with this goyim and his bacon influenced persona. Oy vey, bro.


Clearly I put you over many times in that match. You're welcome. We got a nice hand from the boys in the locker room after closing the show that way.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 1-4

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Ryan wrote:I'd work with you again if this wasn't a tournament where the losers are never heard from again.

To this: I had been thinking of making this a double-elimination tournament with a "loser's bracket" so everyone can get in a least two matches, if that doesn't seem like overkill.

Next set of results should be up tomorrow or Monday. Coming from the Silverdome, hoping to recapture some of the magic from Wrestlemania III in a last hurrah before its implosion.

Crews are working around the clock getting the venue in top condition for the event:

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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 1-4

Post by sancarlos »

After meeting DSafe for a couple beers last night, he might have to postpone his next bout. You know how it goes when wrestlers get together. I'm not saying a chair was smashed over his head last night. But then again, I'm not saying a chair was not smashed over his head.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 1-4

Post by Sabo »

sancarlos wrote:After meeting DSafe for a couple beers last night, he might have to postpone his next bout. You know how it goes when wrestlers get together. I'm not saying a chair was smashed over his head last night. But then again, I'm not saying a chair was not smashed over his head.


He told me what you said as he got in your car. I laughed.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 1-4

Post by Brontoburglar »

A_B wrote:
EnochRoot wrote:...And Brontoburglar's head-butt to A_B's nuts at 5:00? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


I didn't appreciate that and I showed that little fucker. I'm 40 and married. I don't need those anymore anyway.


god dammit
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Johnny Carwash »

MIDWEST REGIONAL - PONTIAC SILVERDOME
brought to you by Faygo and American Coney Island

[spoiler=MATCH RESULTS]GoodKarma defeated HaulCitgo by count-out
bapo! defeated Sabo by pin
Rush2112 defeated BSF21 by pin
Pruitt defeated DSafetyGuy by pin[/spoiler]

A lot of blood in this set of matches. Must have been something in the air.

Match 5 - GoodKarma vs. HaulCitgo
https://youtu.be/8bKoDFngZJg

Match 6 - Sabo vs. bapo!

https://youtu.be/G8jgdx7IGGo

Match 7 - BSF21 vs. Rush2112

https://youtu.be/1aCE3SSMZQw

Match 8 - Pruitt vs. DSafetyGuy

https://youtu.be/hwh0It14ZJE

[spoiler=UPDATED BRACKET]Image[/spoiler]
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by duff »

Pruitt's Canadian Tuxedo is wonderful. I haven't watched the matches yet. They are an exciting way to start this Friday morning.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by rass »

Aw. I wanted to see that pug head bleed.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by BSF21 »

Seesaw match there! Rush beat the shit out of me for 7 minutes. Thought I was gonna make him tap! Love the John Cena look with the cap. Fun way to start Friday. I'll see you in a rematch you bastard.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Sabo »

I'll give bapo props for busting out the Megumi Driver in this match. He left it all out there on the mat.

Still, I have tag team gold around my waist. He just has a bad haircut.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by duff »

Citgo bladed early in his match with Good Karma. Taking a page out of the New Jack playbook and going all Mass Transit. "The Pug" looks like his diaper was full at the end. Disappointed in the match.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by bapo! »

Pruitt, on behalf of the other boys in the room, I want to thank you for getting rid of that scum DSafe. There's no room for that kind of behavior in our sport. Our commissioner won't do anything about him, and the referees are afraid to do their job, so we have to take it upon ourselves. I raise this Molson to you.

Also, I think we should all pitch in a few bucks for the ring crew tonight. They have a hard job, and it's even harder when they have to scrub Canadian blood out of the canvas.

Sabo, have fun in the loser's bracket. I'm sure you'll feel more at home there.

As for me, I've proven that I have a few miles left in these boots. I still have the purplest hair, I wear the finest hockey jerseys, and I hang out with the friendliest guys. Whoo!
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by duff »

Rush is a true mountain man. He manhandled BSF. Rush also bladed too early for my liking. The match overall should have been a squash match. The booker should be ashamed to have let BSF mount much of an offense. And way too many submission moves during all of these matches. Those are finishers.

Decent match, but would have been better as a squash.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by A_B »

I need a glossary.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by BSF21 »

duff wrote:Rush is a true mountain man. He manhandled BSF. Rush also bladed too early for my liking. The match overall should have been a squash match. The booker should be ashamed to have let BSF mount much of an offense. And way too many submission moves during all of these matches. Those are finishers.

Decent match, but would have been better as a squash.


You keep that shit talk in dead-ass Anderson you piss poor excuse for a Hoosier.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Gunpowder »

SanCarlos' day of reckoning is ALMOST FUCKING NIGH.

WELCOME TO NIGHGERIA BITCH!

BILL NIGH THE VIOLENCE GUY BOUT TO WRECK YOU IN THE RING!
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Sabo »

duff wrote:The booker should be ashamed to have let BSF mount much of an offense.


If Rush felt BSF had too much offense, he should've cut him off. That's not the booker's fault.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Pruitt »

bapo! wrote:Pruitt, on behalf of the other boys in the room, I want to thank you for getting rid of that scum DSafe. There's no room for that kind of behavior in our sport. Our commissioner won't do anything about him, and the referees are afraid to do their job, so we have to take it upon ourselves. I raise this Molson to you.


It's really hard to beat two men - that ref was in the tank.

I counted 4 bites and at least as many chokes from that masked motherfucker. It's behaviour like his that gives our sport a bad name.

Now to work on my new finishing move, the Caress of Steel!
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by duff »

So glad to see sabo go down. Although, not as happy to see that no good cheat DSG lose. They are the perfect heel tag team. Give them a bit of glory, but no way they keep that title. babo! had a wonderful showing, although that kangaroo kick at the end wasn't worth a finish. I think sabo just gave up. Typical of his ilk. Pouting his way out of the winner's bracket.

Pruitt/DSG match was by far the match of so far. Good pacing, great action and a terrific finish. That should not have been a first round matchup, but them the breaks. Great match gentleman and DSG.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by GoodKarma »

That match was pretty much a metaphor for my real life...horrible execution; get my ass kicked in my underwear for 15 minutes before coming out on top thanks to a technicality.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by duff »

BSF21 wrote:
duff wrote:Rush is a true mountain man. He manhandled BSF. Rush also bladed too early for my liking. The match overall should have been a squash match. The booker should be ashamed to have let BSF mount much of an offense. And way too many submission moves during all of these matches. Those are finishers.

Decent match, but would have been better as a squash.


You keep that shit talk in dead-ass Anderson you piss poor excuse for a Hoosier.


I am not certain your excellent education from Ball State is not being put to good use. The way it works is you win, you move on. Like I did. When you lose like yourself, you get to enjoy your time with all of the other losers. My advice to you is to keep your infested trap shut. Your skill set are that of hard style, but be sure of this, you are not hard style. Make it through puberty first before you attempt anything hard. And anytime you want to become the King of Central Indiana, let me know. I will be the second coming of Dick the Bruiser. You can bet you sorry little ass on that. Now go back to your Playskool toys.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Johnny Carwash »

I had forgotten that GPJ asked for a custom name for his signature move earlier:

Image
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Gunpowder »

Hahahaha Run-Up Cutter!


Ohhhhhh wait.....
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Gunpowder »

Pretty close on the birthday, though I definitely have 2 inches and 40 pounds on that sassy handjobbing machine.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by sancarlos »

I imagine I'll be relaxed and content after receiving the Montana Hand Job from Gunpowder.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Johnny Carwash »

GoodKarma wrote:That match was pretty much a metaphor for my real life...horrible execution; get my ass kicked in my underwear for 15 minutes before coming out on top thanks to a technicality.


This is great, by the way. As are duff's critiques and all the kayfabe.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by brian »

I just started reading this thread. The American Coney Island logo in the ring is...***kisses fingers***
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by DSafetyGuy »

Pruitt wrote:
bapo! wrote:Pruitt, on behalf of the other boys in the room, I want to thank you for getting rid of that scum DSafe. There's no room for that kind of behavior in our sport. Our commissioner won't do anything about him, and the referees are afraid to do their job, so we have to take it upon ourselves. I raise this Molson to you.


It's really hard to beat two men - that ref was in the tank.

I counted 4 bites and at least as many chokes from that masked motherfucker. It's behaviour like his that gives our sport a bad name.

Now to work on my new finishing move, the Caress of Steel!


Beat two men, Pruitt? If anything, I was the one being treated unjustly by the officiating. You go unpunished for throwing me out of the ring to the floor and claim I'm the one getting helped by the referee. Good to know that the reason you survived three piledrivers is your head is frozen solid. And clearly, your jailhouse blues Canadian tuxedo is hiding some extra padding. Getting up after that suplex I laid on you is clearly the sign of illegal protection underneath your ring attire.

With this tournament now underway, it is completely clear to me that the entire Swamp Wrestling Federation is acting in concert against Top Talent. First, the seeding in this tournament that I have previously pointed out to be absurd, at best. Then, Sabo gets screwed out of a victory, then I do, as well, undoubtedly due to my righteous indignance at how we were seeded in this sham of a tournament. And now, every clown in a pair of tights can't keep our names out of their mouths.

Well, as soon as you jokers get your act together, let Commisioner ClownCar know you want a shot at the best. Sabo and I will be waiting with gold around our waists, hundred dollar bills falling out of our wallets, and more Top Talent on our arms.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Johnny Carwash »

brian wrote:I just started reading this thread. The American Coney Island logo in the ring is...***kisses fingers***


I should have set the match between you and Nonlinear here, but I had already set the bracket before coming up with the regional venue idea.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by BSF21 »

duff wrote:
BSF21 wrote:
duff wrote:Rush is a true mountain man. He manhandled BSF. Rush also bladed too early for my liking. The match overall should have been a squash match. The booker should be ashamed to have let BSF mount much of an offense. And way too many submission moves during all of these matches. Those are finishers.

Decent match, but would have been better as a squash.


You keep that shit talk in dead-ass Anderson you piss poor excuse for a Hoosier.


I am not certain your excellent education from Ball State is not being put to good use. The way it works is you win, you move on. Like I did. When you lose like yourself, you get to enjoy your time with all of the other losers. My advice to you is to keep your infested trap shut. Your skill set are that of hard style, but be sure of this, you are not hard style. Make it through puberty first before you attempt anything hard. And anytime you want to become the King of Central Indiana, let me know. I will be the second coming of Dick the Bruiser. You can bet you sorry little ass on that. Now go back to your Playskool toys.


You think one fluke loss is going to knock the Prince of Indy down? If I gotta fight another 400lb Rikishi ass motherfucker to get back in, set it up. I'm not about to hear shit from some Region Rat wannabe.

YMCA? You Can't Ask Much out of duff.

Beating up on a misspelled trivia boy when I'm going flyweight V superheavy. Your match was trash. Your craft is trash. You can't cut it down here on the mean streets so until you can, keep your fake cop ass up with your indian and navy boy up in Hammond or wherever the hell you're= hiding these days. Come at me again with that weak mouth and I'll whoop your ass quicker than a William Henry Harrison chest cold.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Pruitt »

DSafetyGuy wrote:
Pruitt wrote:
bapo! wrote:Pruitt, on behalf of the other boys in the room, I want to thank you for getting rid of that scum DSafe. There's no room for that kind of behavior in our sport. Our commissioner won't do anything about him, and the referees are afraid to do their job, so we have to take it upon ourselves. I raise this Molson to you.


It's really hard to beat two men - that ref was in the tank.

I counted 4 bites and at least as many chokes from that masked motherfucker. It's behaviour like his that gives our sport a bad name.

Now to work on my new finishing move, the Caress of Steel!


Beat two men, Pruitt? If anything, I was the one being treated unjustly by the officiating. You go unpunished for throwing me out of the ring to the floor and claim I'm the one getting helped by the referee. Good to know that the reason you survived three piledrivers is your head is frozen solid. And clearly, your jailhouse blues Canadian tuxedo is hiding some extra padding. Getting up after that suplex I laid on you is clearly the sign of illegal protection underneath your ring attire.


Want some cheese with that whine?
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by A_B »

All I know is...Johnnie probably ought to buy some life insurance.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Johnny Carwash »

The ref is me, by the way. I wouldn't call myself the commissioner though; that's more "the collective will of the Swamp."
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by wlu_lax6 »

All I know is after an exhibition loss and first round exit it maybe time to go buy some K&G cheap suits, grow out the gut, comb-over the hair and start my career as charismatic manager.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by P.D.X. »

What's with the furry tennis racket?
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by EnochRoot »

Johnny Carwash wrote:The ref is me, by the way. I wouldn't call myself the commissioner though; that's more "the collective will of the Swamp."


Do you have control as to what time in the track it starts for the intro music? If so, :28 for me (if possible)...
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by brian »

I honestly didn't realize I was in this thing, so I assume my walk-up music has already been selected, but if not let me know and I'll put in a request.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Johnny Carwash »

brian wrote:I honestly didn't realize I was in this thing, so I assume my walk-up music has already been selected, but if not let me know and I'll put in a request.

I included everyone who was in the OOTP thing in case they wanted in eventually.

Let me know what walk-up music you want. If you hadn't posted I was going to give you
[+] spoiler
Hollywood Nights by Bob Seger
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by brian »

Johnny Carwash wrote:
brian wrote:I honestly didn't realize I was in this thing, so I assume my walk-up music has already been selected, but if not let me know and I'll put in a request.

I included everyone who was in the OOTP thing in case they wanted in eventually.

Let me know what walk-up music you want. If you hadn't posted I was going to give you
[+] spoiler
Hollywood Nights by Bob Seger


If you don't mind how about "Kick Out The Jams" by the MC5. A little more Wayne County, a little less Lapeer County, a little more aggressive. Thanks.
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Re: Swamp Wrestling Federation - FIRST ROUND MATCHES 5-8

Post by Johnny Carwash »

EnochRoot wrote:
Johnny Carwash wrote:The ref is me, by the way. I wouldn't call myself the commissioner though; that's more "the collective will of the Swamp."


Do you have control as to what time in the track it starts for the intro music? If so, :28 for me (if possible)...


Actually, that's basically the clip I used.
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