The official body-shaming thread
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The official body-shaming thread
Mostly self-shaming, unlike that asshole sabo.
Sitting here on a morning off, swamping in the sun, and noticed a mutant arm hair. It appears to be over twice as long as the rest of my arm hair and it’s sticking straight up. WTF
Sitting here on a morning off, swamping in the sun, and noticed a mutant arm hair. It appears to be over twice as long as the rest of my arm hair and it’s sticking straight up. WTF
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Clearly, you need to re-read my post, you long arm hair weirdo.
Birds don’t suck. They lack the necessary anatomical structures to do so.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
I'm fat. It's getting old. As am I.
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
I've gotten a few of those over the years, very strange. I had one on my earlobe once, which was very strange. That just triggered a bizarre memory. I hooked up with a girl in law school who had one hair on her nipple that was like 4 inches long. My friend hooked up with her a year later, so I had to ask. The hair was still there. I was so tempted to pull it out.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Yeah, ear hair is a thing now that sucks.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Only had the one, but if my father is any indication of my future...
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Ooh. If my father is, I'll end up with some but after 2-3 years it will all disappear for good!The Sybian wrote: ↑Fri Dec 11, 2020 10:43 amOnly had the one, but if my father is any indication of my future...
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Haven't had a mutant hair in a while, but arm, ear, and just above the eyebrow is where they've sprouted on me in the past.
Until everything is less insane, I'm mixing weed with wine.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Wizard brows are a concern.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Eugene Levy has made a career out it.
Dances with Wolves (1) - BSF
"This place was rockin'," said BSF21.
"There is nothing ever uncommon about BSF21."
"This place was rockin'," said BSF21.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Steering this away from hair ... I don't think I have a pant length. Everything is either slightly long or, obviously worse, slightly short.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Nose hair.
Eye brows that go insane.
Two things that horrify me - had uncles and a Zaida who didn't trim properly.
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
Re: The official body-shaming thread
I get mutant knuckle hairs, and a couple eyebrow hairs grow twice as long as the rest of the battalion. Ear hair is hilarious, as is the fact I need to shave the bulb area of my nose. Oh, dumbass hairs that get bored of being inside my nose need trimming too.
Noli Timere Messorem
Re: The official body-shaming thread
After my heart attack back in 2018, I lost 20 pounds and got in much better shape. Drank less, exercised more.
Now, in 2020. I've gained back all the weight, drink more and exercise less. Dammit.
On the plus side, I grow a better beard now than ever before. Weird.
Now, in 2020. I've gained back all the weight, drink more and exercise less. Dammit.
On the plus side, I grow a better beard now than ever before. Weird.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
I can't wait to see what we are writing in this thread 20-30 years from now.EnochRoot wrote: ↑Fri Dec 11, 2020 12:06 pm I get mutant knuckle hairs, and a couple eyebrow hairs grow twice as long as the rest of the battalion. Ear hair is hilarious, as is the fact I need to shave the bulb area of my nose. Oh, dumbass hairs that get bored of being inside my nose need trimming too.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Had to clean out my earbuds this morning
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Gross.
Toothpicks work well.
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
I had to buy new dress shirts to get a bigger neck size.
And his one problem is he didn’t go to Russia that night because he had extracurricular activities, and they froze to death.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
I've started walking at least three miles a day and we don't yet own a scale so it's hard to tell what kind of a difference it's made as far as weight, but I feel better mentally and I'm starting to build some strength back physically (walking up from the beach there's a hill before you get to our condo with a 75-foot vertical climb at maybe about a 15-degree slope, all over one city block. It sucks. But I'm getting less winded every time I walk up it now).
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Made it through shoveling out a shit/piss path for the dog in the backyard three times and clearing our main front yard walkway three times and was trying to take smaller scoops as I started on the driveway this morning but got maybe a quarter of a way into clearing out the front of the first car to the street and tweaked some recurringly angry muscle in my right side so now for the first time ever we've got neighbors clearing out the rest of the snow. And I'll probably sleep like shit tonight, too.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
I wish we had more incline here, but I've been doing the same for the last several months, but not skipping a day in two weeks. Between that and cutting way back on alcohol, it's crazy how much mentally better I feel.brian wrote: ↑Sun Jan 24, 2021 3:35 pm I've started walking at least three miles a day and we don't yet own a scale so it's hard to tell what kind of a difference it's made as far as weight, but I feel better mentally and I'm starting to build some strength back physically (walking up from the beach there's a hill before you get to our condo with a 75-foot vertical climb at maybe about a 15-degree slope, all over one city block. It sucks. But I'm getting less winded every time I walk up it now).
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Three shovels yesterday and one today and almost done. If this weren't such a light snow I'd probably hurt myself out there and then bitch about future ramifications.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
It's horrifying when your body starts to make new smells.
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
The other night after a particularly delicious beef stew I wished I had a dog to blame. I woke myself up and nearly gagged.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Somehow I have trained my body to not fart at night. If I hadn't, I'd be a widower by now.
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
Re: The official body-shaming thread
I think you mean you'd be dead by now, and your wife would be a widow.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
Not really - I've built up an immunity to the fumes
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
And also an immunity to mariticide jokes!Pruitt wrote: ↑Wed Feb 03, 2021 4:19 pmNot really - I've built up an immunity to the fumes
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Everyone likes the smell of their own brand.
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Yeah. I meant that your wife would kill you.A_B wrote: ↑Wed Feb 03, 2021 4:26 pmAnd also an immunity to mariticide jokes!Pruitt wrote: ↑Wed Feb 03, 2021 4:19 pmNot really - I've built up an immunity to the fumes
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
Re: The official body-shaming thread
I took most of December off from running after somehow injuring my right foot (overuse? still not sure). Been slowly ramping up this month after seeing some docs and getting fancy orthotic inserts. But I've noticed during this interregnum that my feet have all of a sudden been noticeably sweaty, and kinda smelly? Even right now when I've had no sneakers or socks on yet today. I've just been puttering around the house in pretty much the same getup I've been in since March 2020 (slides, no socks). Feel like I'm back in HS or college again where I just wore the same damn socks every day.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
If I wear my slides for any extended period of time I get foot stank. I don't like wearing socks with them, but if I am just around the house I usually do (I'm still anemic and still cold as shit all the damn time). haven't noticed it as bad if I am out in the fresh air.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Why do hairs grow out of a nose?
Not the nostrils, the nose.
Not the nostrils, the nose.
From the north coast of Lake Ontario
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
You are going to have to give the rest of us a few years to catch up before we can relate to this one.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
I'm in the same boat as Rass that I haven't gone out for a run yet this year. I'm using the excuse that the cold air would kick in my asthma, but the real reason is that I just haven't felt like it. After the snow subsides I'll try to get a couple runs in avant je pars.
My avatar corresponds on my place in the Swamp posting list with the all-time Home Run list. Number 45 is Paul Konerko with 439.
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Tweezing!The Sybian wrote: ↑Fri Jan 28, 2022 11:59 amYou are going to have to give the rest of us a few years to catch up before we can relate to this one.
For the love of God, what is happening to me?
From the north coast of Lake Ontario
Re: The official body-shaming thread
I've always been an electric razor guy. And it makes managing stray ear and nose hairs as easy as can be. Just one or two extra swipes.pruitt2 wrote: ↑Fri Jan 28, 2022 3:32 pmTweezing!The Sybian wrote: ↑Fri Jan 28, 2022 11:59 amYou are going to have to give the rest of us a few years to catch up before we can relate to this one.
For the love of God, what is happening to me?
Totally Kafkaesque
Re: The official body-shaming thread
Had a physical this morning, my first in years. I had been planning on having one done in March 2020, when I turned 45, but you know... And it had been at least a couple of years before that (I can't remember if I had one after turning 40 or not, I should have asked them). There was a med student trailing the doc today and I agreed to let them (turned out to be a dude) come in and check out my junk. Fun.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: The official body-shaming thread
That's nice, but it was a little weird when you asked the janitor if he wanted a turn.rass wrote: ↑Wed Mar 02, 2022 11:09 am Had a physical this morning, my first in years. I had been planning on having one done in March 2020, when I turned 45, but you know... And it had been at least a couple of years before that (I can't remember if I had one after turning 40 or not, I should have asked them). There was a med student trailing the doc today and I agreed to let them (turned out to be a dude) come in and check out my junk. Fun.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
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