Random Headlines

Okay . . . let's try this again.

Moderators: Shirley, Sabo, brian, rass, DaveInSeattle

Post Reply
User avatar
rass
The Dude
Posts: 20209
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 9:41 am
Location: N effin' J

Random Headlines

Post by rass »

I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
Johnnie
The Dude
Posts: 16732
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 7:31 pm
Location: TUCSON, BITCH!

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Johnnie »

Maine man with gun tattoo wakes up to armed police.

Reminds me of when my buddy had a maglite holder on his belt while in a convenient store when suddenly cops arrive to question him. The clerk thought he was carrying a gun and called out of fear she would get robbed or something. The cops, noticing it was a maglite case look at the clerk and in a stern tone say "It's a damn flashlight." They apologize to my friend and leave.

The northeast and its irrational fear of guns is comical.

And before someone says "What kind of idiot gets a gun tattoo?" You have never heard of Christmas Abbott:Image
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
howard
Karl Hungus
Posts: 9467
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 12:00 pm

Re: Random Headlines

Post by howard »

Gun to my head, yeah I would.
Who knows? Maybe, you were kidnapped, tied up, taken away and held for ransom.

Those days are gone forever
Over a long time ago
Oh yeah…
User avatar
The Sybian
The Dude
Posts: 18865
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:36 am
Location: Working in the Crap Part of Jersey

Re: Random Headlines

Post by The Sybian »

howard wrote:Gun to my head, yeah I would.

I'm not gay, but I'll learn. Wait, that's a woman? Fuck.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
User avatar
Johnny Carwash
The Dude
Posts: 5952
Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 8:57 am
Location: Land of 10,000 Sununus

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
User avatar
rass
The Dude
Posts: 20209
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 9:41 am
Location: N effin' J

Re: Random Headlines

Post by rass »

Obama gives Pope box of seeds
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
User avatar
bfj
Walter Sobchak
Posts: 3960
Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2013 11:08 pm

Re: Random Headlines

Post by bfj »

Johnnie wrote:Maine man with gun tattoo wakes up to armed police.

Reminds me of when my buddy had a maglite holder on his belt while in a convenient store when suddenly cops arrive to question him. The clerk thought he was carrying a gun and called out of fear she would get robbed or something. The cops, noticing it was a maglite case look at the clerk and in a stern tone say "It's a damn flashlight." They apologize to my friend and leave.

The northeast and its irrational fear of guns is comical.

And before someone says "What kind of idiot gets a gun tattoo?" You have never heard of Christmas Abbott:Image
He's pretty.
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
howard
Karl Hungus
Posts: 9467
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 12:00 pm

Re: Random Headlines

Post by howard »

Who knows? Maybe, you were kidnapped, tied up, taken away and held for ransom.

Those days are gone forever
Over a long time ago
Oh yeah…
User avatar
rass
The Dude
Posts: 20209
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 9:41 am
Location: N effin' J

Re: Random Headlines

Post by rass »

I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
User avatar
The Sybian
The Dude
Posts: 18865
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:36 am
Location: Working in the Crap Part of Jersey

Re: Random Headlines

Post by The Sybian »


Their act seems better suited for a 7 year old birthday party.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
User avatar
Ryan
The Dude
Posts: 10439
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 10:01 am

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Ryan »

"Do you guys give up? Or are you thirsty for more?"
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
he’s a fixbking cyborg or some shit. The

holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
User avatar
Pruitt
The Dude
Posts: 18105
Joined: Tue Jun 04, 2013 10:02 am
Location: North Shore of Lake Ontario

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Pruitt »

The Sybian wrote:

Their act seems better suited for a 7 year old birthday party.
This clip is about 90 seconds long - I defy you to make it all the way through.



Reminds me of the drunk yahoos who would bring their guitars and bongos to campus pub nights where they'd play Dead songs which none of them seemed to know how to play.
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
User avatar
rass
The Dude
Posts: 20209
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 9:41 am
Location: N effin' J

Re: Random Headlines

Post by rass »

I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
User avatar
rass
The Dude
Posts: 20209
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 9:41 am
Location: N effin' J

Re: Random Headlines

Post by rass »

Image
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
User avatar
EdRomero
Donny
Posts: 2359
Joined: Thu Jun 12, 2014 9:39 pm

Re: Random Headlines

Post by EdRomero »

User avatar
Pruitt
The Dude
Posts: 18105
Joined: Tue Jun 04, 2013 10:02 am
Location: North Shore of Lake Ontario

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Pruitt »


Quote of the day -
Steven French, 18, who was visiting from Haverhill, Massachusetts, described the chaotic scene to the local paper, The Keene Sentinel, as "wicked."
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
User avatar
Johnny Carwash
The Dude
Posts: 5952
Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 8:57 am
Location: Land of 10,000 Sununus

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Johnny Carwash »

I don't know whether it proves him right or wrong, but funny how Keene was singled out by John Oliver a couple months ago for its police force having a military-grade armored vehicle and saying that its pumpkin festival was a potential terrorist target.

Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
User avatar
brian
The Dude
Posts: 27740
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 10:52 am
Location: Downtown Las Vegas

Re: Random Headlines

Post by brian »

Damn, he's a wizard.
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
Johnnie
The Dude
Posts: 16732
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 7:31 pm
Location: TUCSON, BITCH!

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Johnnie »

I guess there's a lot of basic bitches in New Hampshire getting turnt up over pumpkin spice lattes.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
User avatar
rass
The Dude
Posts: 20209
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 9:41 am
Location: N effin' J

Re: Random Headlines

Post by rass »

I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
User avatar
The Sybian
The Dude
Posts: 18865
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:36 am
Location: Working in the Crap Part of Jersey

Re: Random Headlines

Post by The Sybian »

If it happened to somebody else, I may not have laughed as much. Great article.

The first time that Jose Canseco became separated from his left middle finger was when he shot himself in late October while cleaning a firearm in the kitchen of his Las Vegas home. The bullet barely missed his wife, who was nearby.
The strangest part of the story is that Canseco didn't hit his wife.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
User avatar
Johnny Carwash
The Dude
Posts: 5952
Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 8:57 am
Location: Land of 10,000 Sununus

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Actually six months ago, but too good to pass up: Romanian princess pleads guilty to running cockfighting ring in Oregon
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
User avatar
Rex
The Dude
Posts: 7264
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 3:10 pm

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Rex »

Moving to India, you guys.

http://uk.reuters.com/article/2015/01/0 ... TU20150108" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
User avatar
The Sybian
The Dude
Posts: 18865
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:36 am
Location: Working in the Crap Part of Jersey

Re: Random Headlines

Post by The Sybian »

Rex wrote:Moving to India, you guys.

http://uk.reuters.com/article/2015/01/0 ... TU20150108" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Good lord, and I thought US Federal gov't employees' unions were ridiculous. I want to know if he continued collecting paychecks.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
User avatar
Johnny Carwash
The Dude
Posts: 5952
Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 8:57 am
Location: Land of 10,000 Sununus

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
User avatar
brian
The Dude
Posts: 27740
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 10:52 am
Location: Downtown Las Vegas

Re: Random Headlines

Post by brian »

69 people die after drinking beer contaminated with crocodile bile in Mozambique

Honestly I'm not even sure I want to read the story. I might always want it to remain a mystery why someone thought -- "Hey, let's add some crocodile bile to beer and see what happens!"
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
User avatar
brian
The Dude
Posts: 27740
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 10:52 am
Location: Downtown Las Vegas

Re: Random Headlines

Post by brian »

This could also go in the beer thread or the "learn something new every day thread" (apparently, crocodile bile is poisonous.)
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
User avatar
BSF21
The Dude
Posts: 5261
Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 2:08 pm
Location: Playing one off the Monster

Re: Random Headlines

Post by BSF21 »

brian wrote:This could also go in the beer thread or the "learn something new every day thread" (apparently, crocodile bile is poisonous.)
Gustavo Fring brand lager.
Dances with Wolves (1) - BSF

"This place was rockin'," said BSF21.

"There is nothing ever uncommon about BSF21."
User avatar
Pruitt
The Dude
Posts: 18105
Joined: Tue Jun 04, 2013 10:02 am
Location: North Shore of Lake Ontario

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Pruitt »

brian wrote:69 people die after drinking beer contaminated with crocodile bile in Mozambique

Honestly I'm not even sure I want to read the story. I might always want it to remain a mystery why someone thought -- "Hey, let's add some crocodile bile to beer and see what happens!"
Well, one of the die hards over at RateBeer.com has sampled this brew - although, not the contaminated batch...

He wasn't impressed.

http://www.ratebeer.com/beer/pumbe/94021/
Pours a milky off white/white and somewhat viscous. Smells intensely sour and boozy with what can best be described as a nail polish undertone. Tastes sour and very acidic and very boozy.
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
User avatar
The Sybian
The Dude
Posts: 18865
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:36 am
Location: Working in the Crap Part of Jersey

Re: Random Headlines

Post by The Sybian »

I saw that an Icelandic brewery is making a beer infused with Fin Whale testicles. Fin whales are an endangered species, but Iceland still hunts them to sell the meet to Japan.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
User avatar
brian
The Dude
Posts: 27740
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 10:52 am
Location: Downtown Las Vegas

Re: Random Headlines

Post by brian »

The Sybian wrote:I saw that an Icelandic brewery is making a beer infused with Fin Whale testicles. Fin whales are an endangered species, but Iceland still hunts them to sell the meet to Japan.
I can pretty much tell you right now that the only Icelandic brewery worth trying is Einstok. But if it's them, then it's probably good because their beers are solid.

ETA: And apparently their beers are available in the U.S., though only six or seven states but including NY/NJ
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
User avatar
The Sybian
The Dude
Posts: 18865
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:36 am
Location: Working in the Crap Part of Jersey

Re: Random Headlines

Post by The Sybian »

brian wrote:
The Sybian wrote:I saw that an Icelandic brewery is making a beer infused with Fin Whale testicles. Fin whales are an endangered species, but Iceland still hunts them to sell the meet to Japan.
I can pretty much tell you right now that the only Icelandic brewery worth trying is Einstok. But if it's them, then it's probably good because their beers are solid.

ETA: And apparently their beers are available in the U.S., though only six or seven states but including NY/NJ
I've seen it in several stores and thought of you. I've seen a couple other Icelandic beers on the shelves recently.

ETA: It seems like a small brewery, and that beer was only sold locally.They are supposedly brewing more and widening the distribution to a second city. Though town or village is probably more accurate.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
User avatar
sancarlos
The Dude
Posts: 18061
Joined: Fri Mar 15, 2013 1:46 pm
Location: NorCal via Colorado

Re: Random Headlines

Post by sancarlos »

Odd coincidence. I was going to post this in the beer thread, but now it seems more pertinent, here. Yesterday I received late Christmas presents from my sister-in-law, including a six-pack of Einstok. She knew that I often order it when we visit a little French bistro in town. Good white ale.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
User avatar
brian
The Dude
Posts: 27740
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 10:52 am
Location: Downtown Las Vegas

Re: Random Headlines

Post by brian »

Kurt Busch says his girlfriend is a trained assassin.

If ever a story was right up Bronto's alley. TMZ-worthy allegations, dudes who drive in circles.
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
User avatar
sancarlos
The Dude
Posts: 18061
Joined: Fri Mar 15, 2013 1:46 pm
Location: NorCal via Colorado

Re: Random Headlines

Post by sancarlos »

Britain in Crisis as Cadbury Changes Crème Egg Recipe
and
Nation in Shock as Cadbury's Changes Crème Egg Recipe

I tend to agree with the outrage, because I do hate it when manufacturers cut costs by using lesser ingredients. But, I thought the headlines were funny.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
User avatar
Johnny Carwash
The Dude
Posts: 5952
Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 8:57 am
Location: Land of 10,000 Sununus

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Johnny Carwash »

Image
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
User avatar
Pruitt
The Dude
Posts: 18105
Joined: Tue Jun 04, 2013 10:02 am
Location: North Shore of Lake Ontario

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Pruitt »

Arizona Yoga Instructor busted for Sex at Bar Mitzvah

http://forward.com/articles/217601/ariz ... -bar-mitz/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
"beautiful, with an exotic-yet-familiar facial structure and an arresting gaze."
howard
Karl Hungus
Posts: 9467
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 12:00 pm

Re: Random Headlines

Post by howard »

Wait, what happened to "today I am a man"?
Who knows? Maybe, you were kidnapped, tied up, taken away and held for ransom.

Those days are gone forever
Over a long time ago
Oh yeah…
User avatar
Giff
The Dude
Posts: 10794
Joined: Mon Mar 25, 2013 3:26 pm

Re: Random Headlines

Post by Giff »

My wife is a writer/editor for one of the biggest hospitals here. Here's the headline she was given for an article that was submitted for their monthly magazine:

Hemodynamic Changes Associated with Manual and Automated Lateral Turning in Mechanically Ventilated Intensive Care Unit Patients

Catchy!
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
User avatar
brian
The Dude
Posts: 27740
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 10:52 am
Location: Downtown Las Vegas

Re: Random Headlines

Post by brian »

Pretty much don't even have to read the article.
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
Post Reply