FWIW, I *seriously* considered directing you to eat your ex-wife's corpse, but with the social health of the colony already in a precarious state thought it would be too risky.Nonlinear FC wrote:You say "we" eat the emu... I'm correct in assuming I go my own route in this scenario, right?
I mean, that's fresh manmeat sittin' right there.
Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Final Countdown
Moderators: Shirley, Sabo, brian, rass, DaveInSeattle
- Johnny Carwash
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
- Johnny Carwash
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Lunch update:
With two Swampers (plus a dog and an ex-wife) now gone, we manage to stabilize things a bit and a few relatively quiet days pass. I'd like to get Gunpowder a bionic or at least a peg leg, but the operation would require anesthetics that we don't currently have, so for now he'll just have to get accustomed to doing his daily tasks hopping around on one foot.
Now here comes another raid, the first one in a while. We take our fighting positions.
Johnnie drops one raider as he charges our position. Nonlinear is hit from the side by a thrown spear that penetrates both his lungs at once and kills him! Another thrown spear "destroys" Johnnie's stomach but this, is apparently not a major problem. Gunpowder rushes Nonlinear's killer and stabs him to death, but another attacker closes in and clubs him repeatedly. Johnnie drops another attacker from afar and they flee. Ryan, who stays out of the fight, proceeds to smoke a joint.
We're now down to just three. Our survival from this point likely hinges on new joiners, but who would want to join this shitstorm?
With two Swampers (plus a dog and an ex-wife) now gone, we manage to stabilize things a bit and a few relatively quiet days pass. I'd like to get Gunpowder a bionic or at least a peg leg, but the operation would require anesthetics that we don't currently have, so for now he'll just have to get accustomed to doing his daily tasks hopping around on one foot.
Now here comes another raid, the first one in a while. We take our fighting positions.
Johnnie drops one raider as he charges our position. Nonlinear is hit from the side by a thrown spear that penetrates both his lungs at once and kills him! Another thrown spear "destroys" Johnnie's stomach but this, is apparently not a major problem. Gunpowder rushes Nonlinear's killer and stabs him to death, but another attacker closes in and clubs him repeatedly. Johnnie drops another attacker from afar and they flee. Ryan, who stays out of the fight, proceeds to smoke a joint.
We're now down to just three. Our survival from this point likely hinges on new joiners, but who would want to join this shitstorm?
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Who indeed? Art imitates life.
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Is Ryan sharing that weed? I'm just saying.
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
I'm just merc'ing fools. And my stomach is never a problem. If you've ever eaten lunch or dinner with me you'd know that.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
- Johnny Carwash
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
I just realized that giving Nonlinear a cowboy hat proved eerily prescient, as his story arc ended up mimicking a country & western song:
- His wife leaves him
- His dog dies
- A couple of his friends die
- His wife comes back but then promptly dies
- He dies
- His wife leaves him
- His dog dies
- A couple of his friends die
- His wife comes back but then promptly dies
- He dies
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
and I appreciate the fact that it is real country theme not that New CountryJohnny Carwash wrote:I just realized that giving Nonlinear a cowboy hat proved eerily prescient, as his story arc ended up mimicking a country & western song:
- His wife leaves him
- His dog dies
- A couple of his friends die
- His wife comes back but then promptly dies
- He dies
- bapo!
- The Big Lebowski
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to fight emus.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Somebody had better get me a damn prosthetic foot.
Pack a vest for your james in the city of intercourse
- A_B
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Hot Take: Tonight is the end of Swampville III.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
- Brontoburglar
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
impressive that you rushed the attacker and killed him on one leg. maybe you still can dunk.Gunpowder wrote:Somebody had better get me a damn prosthetic foot.
"We're not the smartest people in the world. We go down the straightaway and turn left. That's literally what we do." -- Clint Bowyer
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Brontoburglar wrote:impressive that you rushed the attacker and killed him on one leg. maybe you still can dunk.Gunpowder wrote:Somebody had better get me a damn prosthetic foot.
I was damn close this summer but then my foot did kinda explode and hurt for like a week. Stupid Lisfranc
Pack a vest for your james in the city of intercourse
- bapo!
- The Big Lebowski
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Carwash didn't write about this, but I'm assuming that Swampville III is still observing the Nine Days of Mourning following my death, right? Either that, or Gunpowder just used my body for stabbing practice.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
You died?
he’s a fixbking cyborg or some shit. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Ryan, lifting his head from a fluffy purple pillow, wrote:You died?
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
- Johnny Carwash
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Down to our last three colonists, our base is struck by lightning and catches on fire! Johnnie, who for some unexplained reason refuses to participate in firefighting, is indifferent and calmly eats breakfast. Ryan is woken out of bed and spends a few seconds putting out flames before going back to sleep as the fire rages next door. Gunpowder frantically does his best before passing out from the heat. Johnnie carries him from the infirmary, then goes back to planting crops.
Ryan is woken from bed by the flames and finally realizes their severity shortly before burning to death.
In the infirmary, Gunpowder succumbs to an infected wound from the earlier battle as the fire rages around him. Meanwhile Johnnie plants crops.
A rain finally comes and extinguishes the fire. Maybe this was Johnnie's plan all along?
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
- Johnny Carwash
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
So, now it's a matter of seeing if Johnnie can survive on his own. Let's see what Masshole Robinson Crusoe can do. He is capable of performing most basic tasks at least moderately well (except firefighting), and we have decent stocks of food and basic supplies, so it's not necessarily a lost cause. Unless we get attacked by raiders.
Here's an instance where Johnnie's psychopathy is actually an asset. The death and despair around him do not affect his mood in the least, and he has a clear mind to get to work.
Within a short time, Johnnie has done an admirable job making essential repairs to what remains of the base, fixing the refrigerated food storage area so the supplies won't spoil. He just might be able to pull this out!
Here's an instance where Johnnie's psychopathy is actually an asset. The death and despair around him do not affect his mood in the least, and he has a clear mind to get to work.
Within a short time, Johnnie has done an admirable job making essential repairs to what remains of the base, fixing the refrigerated food storage area so the supplies won't spoil. He just might be able to pull this out!
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Fucking Crossfit
he’s a fixbking cyborg or some shit. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
- Johnny Carwash
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
So, remember when I said Johnnie might be able to pull this out as long as we weren't attacked by raiders? Guess what.
Just two of them, but that's still double what we have. One with Molotov cocktails, the other with a shotgun.
Johnnie manages to drop Molotov cocktail guy, but the other catches him with a shotgun blast to the chest and he dies.
Swampville III lasted 56 days. Here's a recap:
bapo - shot and killed by robotic centipede
sancarlos - pecked to death by emu
Nonlinear - killed by thrown spear in battle with tribespeople
Ryan - burned to death in base fire
Gunpowder - died of infection in burning hospital
Johnnie - shot and killed by pirate raiders
Just two of them, but that's still double what we have. One with Molotov cocktails, the other with a shotgun.
Johnnie manages to drop Molotov cocktail guy, but the other catches him with a shotgun blast to the chest and he dies.
Swampville III lasted 56 days. Here's a recap:
bapo - shot and killed by robotic centipede
sancarlos - pecked to death by emu
Nonlinear - killed by thrown spear in battle with tribespeople
Ryan - burned to death in base fire
Gunpowder - died of infection in burning hospital
Johnnie - shot and killed by pirate raiders
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
- bapo!
- The Big Lebowski
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Raise the Jolly Roger!
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
he’s a fixbking cyborg or some shit. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
-
- The Dude
- Posts: 12001
- Joined: Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:07 pm
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Can I nominate a long-absent swamper round?
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Seconded.tennbengal wrote:Can I nominate a long-absent swamper round?
Dances with Wolves (1) - BSF
"This place was rockin'," said BSF21.
"There is nothing ever uncommon about BSF21."
"This place was rockin'," said BSF21.
"There is nothing ever uncommon about BSF21."
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Thirded.BSF21 wrote:Seconded.tennbengal wrote:Can I nominate a long-absent swamper round?
Also, damn near spit out my lunch at "Masshole Robinson Crusoe."
I gotta plant my crawps, kid. These dead people ahhh good for nuthin.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Some of us are still waiting our turn, patiently. Although, watching a particular Canuck threaten everyone in the village before burning the settlement to the ground could be entertaining.
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
- Johnny Carwash
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Are you talking about people whose activity levels have declined, or those who straight-up haven't been around in years?tennbengal wrote:Can I nominate a long-absent swamper round?
I'm kind of hesitant here because we'd be getting into the territory of people I'd never interacted with, and would feel kind of awkward pretending I knew them. So far I've been trying to include those who've shown an interest in this thread are at least active posters. I had another group slotted for the next game, if you guys would like to see this keep going.
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Oh, please. More games. Hoping to see some Swamper on Swamper cannibalism here at some point.
Bandwagon fan of the 2023 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
"Zaz finds a menstruating woman on the field, he eats it. Then he shits himself."
BFJ is the town wizard who runs a magic shop. He also has a golem that he has trained to attack anti-Semites.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
"BillCross has contracted a deadly virus. That's a virus that can kill people, namely BillCross because he contracted it."
he’s a fixbking cyborg or some shit. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
holy fuckbAllZ, what a ducking nightmare. Holy shot. Just, fuck. The
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
"RBaller3 plants a field of candy and nuts. He is also met by a roving horde known as UrbanYouthCult. He talks like them and is immediately accepted."
"A capsule containing a computer fixer from Iowa named edwzipper crashes near the house. He wanders drunkenly inside and becomes RBaller3's twink."
"A capsule containing a computer fixer from Iowa named edwzipper crashes near the house. He wanders drunkenly inside and becomes RBaller3's twink."
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Ryan made a joke that was funny, because BillCross liked to go back and explain everyone's jokes and why they are funny.Ryan wrote:"BillCross has contracted a deadly virus. That's a virus that can kill people, namely BillCross because he contracted it."
Totally Kafkaesque
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- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Car wash, don't stop what you have ready to go on my suggestion, just at some point maybe a long lost swampers round. Bobpents too.
- Johnny Carwash
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Swampville IV
Next up...
P.D.X. grew up as a street urchin but later became a successful entrepreneur. He enjoys brawling but is also quite sociable. He has no other skills of notable merit. He is ugly and is a pyromaniac.
degenerasian spent his youth exploring wrecked starships on his backwater planet, sort of like the girl from the new Star Wars. As an adult, he stayed home to do housework and take care of the kids while his wife worked. He has a "green thumb" and is also kind of good with cooking, crafting, and research. What a dork!
Moreta grew up in a military family before going on to become a veterinarian. This makes her the primary medic for the group by default, though she is not particularly fond of animals. She is also good at shooting and construction. She dislikes men.
Giff grew up in a family of nomadic space traders before devoting his life to humanitarian work. He is good with cooking and animals. Like Syb, he is a teetotaler. He is described as "staggeringly ugly." I'll set the over/under on "is Giff OK?" jokes in this thread at 46.
A_B wrote fiction as a hobby growing up and later became a medieval lord. This background gave him good social and fighting skills, but he absolutely refuses to engage in labor of any kind. He is described as ugly, but not as bad as Giff.
As requested, I'll start making this more interactive by putting decision points up to a poll. See the first one above. And seriously, please don't pick Extreme Desert or Ice Sheet. They're there for informational purposes only. Picking one of them will result in everyone dying before anything interesting can happen.
Next up...
P.D.X. grew up as a street urchin but later became a successful entrepreneur. He enjoys brawling but is also quite sociable. He has no other skills of notable merit. He is ugly and is a pyromaniac.
degenerasian spent his youth exploring wrecked starships on his backwater planet, sort of like the girl from the new Star Wars. As an adult, he stayed home to do housework and take care of the kids while his wife worked. He has a "green thumb" and is also kind of good with cooking, crafting, and research. What a dork!
Moreta grew up in a military family before going on to become a veterinarian. This makes her the primary medic for the group by default, though she is not particularly fond of animals. She is also good at shooting and construction. She dislikes men.
Giff grew up in a family of nomadic space traders before devoting his life to humanitarian work. He is good with cooking and animals. Like Syb, he is a teetotaler. He is described as "staggeringly ugly." I'll set the over/under on "is Giff OK?" jokes in this thread at 46.
A_B wrote fiction as a hobby growing up and later became a medieval lord. This background gave him good social and fighting skills, but he absolutely refuses to engage in labor of any kind. He is described as ugly, but not as bad as Giff.
As requested, I'll start making this more interactive by putting decision points up to a poll. See the first one above. And seriously, please don't pick Extreme Desert or Ice Sheet. They're there for informational purposes only. Picking one of them will result in everyone dying before anything interesting can happen.
Fanniebug wrote: P.S. rass! Dont write me again, dude! You're in ignore list!
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- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Awesome.
C'mon people, vote jungle. Wild animal danger is good Friday reading.
C'mon people, vote jungle. Wild animal danger is good Friday reading.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Selecting boreal forest would make this Swampville like a futuristic Game of Thrones. Just sayin'.
THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH GALA LUNCHEONS, LAD!
- A_B
- The Dude
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Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
Perfect for a Medieval lord!Sabo wrote:Selecting boreal forest would make this Swampville like a futuristic Game of Thrones. Just sayin'.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
Re: Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2016
I like that PDX is dressed like Timber Joey..fitting