Swamp RimWorld Challenge 2017 - The Final Countdown

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 4:33 pm

I voted everyone go die because this game has already peaked.

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 4:45 pm

Johnny Carwash wrote:Just to note that if the "Yes" vote holds, it will now be two people to suffer grisly deaths while out gathering resource because certain other colonists hold that work to be "below" them.

The risks of being a go-getter are known.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 5:26 pm

No regerts.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 6:04 pm

Vote has pulled back into a deadlock. I'll take the decision from the next tie-breaker.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 6:37 pm

Johnny Carwash wrote:Vote has pulled back into a deadlock. I'll take the decision from the next tie-breaker.

....aaaaand you're welcome.

Moreta · Post by **Moreta** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 6:53 pm

Wargs, man.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 6:59 pm

Looks like the vote is "Yes" by an 8-7 margin. Firing up the game now. Sorry, Moreta.

For the record:
- Guy who willfully sets the base on fire every once in a while = "Nah, he's OK"
- Loyal, valuable team member caught in mortal danger = "Tough shit, let her die"

rass · Post by **rass** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 7:19 pm

Too bad "send swamper X out to distract the wargs while Moreta maybe gets away" wasn't an option!

degenerasian · Post by **degenerasian** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 7:57 pm

how did i get 15 kills without much mention?

sneaky kung fu?

Nonlinear FC · Post by **Nonlinear FC** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 7:58 pm

Johnny Carwash wrote:Looks like the vote is "Yes" by an 8-7 margin. Firing up the game now. Sorry, Moreta.

For the record:
- Guy who willfully sets the base on fire every once in a while = "Nah, he's OK"
- Loyal, valuable team member caught in mortal danger = "Tough shit, let her die"

We're making RimWorld great again!

Nonlinear FC · Post by **Nonlinear FC** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:01 pm

rass wrote:Too bad "send swamper X out to distract the wargs while Moreta maybe gets away" wasn't an option!

Don't let him manipulate you, rass.

I'm on to you Carwash!

Brontoburglar · Post by **Brontoburglar** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:21 pm

mister d wrote:I voted everyone go die because this game has already peaked.

figures that my possible inclusion to the game would come on the downslope

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:24 pm

degenerasian wrote:how did i get 15 kills without much mention?

sneaky kung fu?

Yeah, degen turning out to be a killing machine after his backstory made him sound like a huge wuss has been a fun development. He must have learned from his mom.

Playing now and, I won't spoil it before tomorrow, but...I'll just say I'll never doubt this game's ability to surprise me again.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:34 pm

Moreta going full elven lords on the wargs, huh?

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:35 pm

Brontoburglar wrote:
mister d wrote:I voted everyone go die because this game has already peaked.
figures that my possible inclusion to the game would come on the downslope

Not the game itself, just this current mission. You aren't topping "Degen's mom makes a status of him raping an animal".

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:40 pm

A_B wrote:Moreta going full elven lords on the wargs, huh?

Better. And it involves you (sort of).

mister d wrote:Not the game itself, just this current mission. You aren't topping "Degen's mom makes a status of him raping an animal".

Yes we are. Well, maybe not to you.

bapo! · Post by **bapo!** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 9:19 pm

mister d wrote:You aren't topping "Degen's mom makes a statue of him raping an animal"

It was consensual, bro. 'Drunk with love,' remember? Let's not make degen out to be something he's not.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 7:59 am

With the wargs approaching, Moreta stops and braces to make her Swamp-mandated sacrifice. She even manages to kill one of them, but is quickly swarmed and brought down in a frenzy of fangs and claws. It turns out that these wargs are just man-hunters, not man-eaters, so rather than devour her, they simply leave her writhing on the ground and continue on.

Moreta's sacrifice has worked, and the remaining colonists are safe behind the walls, undetected by the warg pack. Unfortunately, we'll have to sit inside idly as Moreta slowly dies of blood loss and exposure over an excruciating span of a day or so.

BUT WAIT!

AB's brother, Larry, appears on the horizon (naked), chased by pirates. It just so happens that Moreta, still clinging to life, lies directly on the path between Larry and our base, with the warg pack having moved out of sight. Larry scoops up Moreta and we wave him in.

"Larry" must be short for "Lawrence," because the scene reminds me of this, except with a fat naked guy carrying Moreta:

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 8:00 am

...and here come the pirates after them, our old nemesis from The Loyal Frogs. They're more numerous and better armed than ever before, with advanced shit like laser rifles and power armor.

We rush out to engage them to provide cover as Larry brings Moreta inside. The pirates' firepower is withering and our guy Aqanquiero is killed. This might be Swampville IV's last stand.

BUT WAIT!

The warg pack re-emerges from behind the pirates and attacks! Within seconds the majority of the pirates are torn limb from limb. We slip back inside, undetected, while the remaining pirates flee in terror.

Victory! That was...fortuitous.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 8:22 am

Don't trust Larry. There are...reasons.

BSF21 · Post by **BSF21** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 9:49 am

That was just the last scene of Jurassic Park with Worgs and Loyal Frogs instead of Raptors and TRex. What a ripoff!

Giff · Post by **Giff** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:11 am

So are there pictures I'm missing? Cause I have no fucking clue what's going on.

bapo! · Post by **bapo!** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:18 am

Deus ex wargpack!

Post by **brian** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:21 am

And some of you doubted our strategery. The old let the wargs nibble at you until you almost die of exposure and a random stranger finds and rescues you at the last minute gambit. Works every time.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:23 am

Giff wrote:So are there pictures I'm missing? Cause I have no fucking clue what's going on.

Are the pictures not showing up for you (or anyone else)? Or are you just confused in general because you're reading this for the first time?

bapo! · Post by **bapo!** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:24 am

If Moreta recovers, I would recommend not telling her about any of this. There might be some hard feelings there.

Giff · Post by **Giff** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:29 am

Johnny Carwash wrote:
Giff wrote:So are there pictures I'm missing? Cause I have no fucking clue what's going on.
Are the pictures not showing up for you (or anyone else)? Or are you just confused in general because you're reading this for the first time?

Not for me, but I'm sure that's a work setting. I'll re-read tonight, but I've been following all along.

DSafetyGuy · Post by **DSafetyGuy** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:31 am

Brontoburglar wrote:
mister d wrote:I voted everyone go die because this game has already peaked.
figures that my possible inclusion to the game would come on the downslope

Mine will come when the game is at its lowest point, before becoming popular once more.

Moreta · Post by **Moreta** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:37 am

bapo! wrote:Deus ex wargpack!

Nice.

Post by **Shirley** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 10:39 am

Pictures show for me. And they are awesome.

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 11:17 am

I gave up on this prematurely after about 10 posts. Lucky me, I've got at least 5 pages to catch up on! This is like binge watching Giff's trip to Charm City!

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 11:35 am

I forgot to mention earlier, but just before the wargs showed up, we invited the friendly neighboring colony of Fun's Tree to send a trade caravan, since we had some surplus goods to sell. Anyway, the caravan arrives as scheduled, unaware of the unfortunate change in circumstances, and is promptly torn to pieces by the wargs. Sorry, Flossie. On the bright side, at least we can loot their stuff when the wargs are gone.

Finally the wargs move on from the area and we're safe. Plus, shitloads of cool loot from dead enemies (and friends).

Worth noting that if the "No" vote had won out yesterday, there would have been like a 99% chance everyone would have died when the wargs stormed the base. Guess the "Yes" guys knew something the others didn't.

A few other developments to catch up on:
- Larry, AB's brother, is now Moreta's least-disliked male peer as a result of having rescued her, though her opinion of him is still slightly negative overall.
- AB's alcohol tolerance is now described as "massive," indicating the game has hit peak realism.
- When we went out to recover Moreta's gear we found she had been carrying amphetamines, but we won't judge.

BSF21 · Post by **BSF21** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 11:46 am

Well shit, why was the option of "Moreta snorts that shit and goes Meth-zerk on those MFers" presented?

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 12:48 pm

So, I've been thinking...should we go ahead and call Swampville IV a success and move on to the next game? After the recent drama, I sort of feel like carrying the story further would be anticlimactic. We've already surpassed the longevity record (around 170 days), and have a healthy functioning base going, so it might be nice to give one colony a happy ending for a change. Plus it's almost Christmas, and not horrifically dying might be a nice Christmas gift.

If there's general agreement here, I'll go ahead and get started setting up the next game. If not, I can put it up to a poll.

Post by **brian** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 12:52 pm

Johnny Carwash wrote:So, I've been thinking...should we go ahead and call Swampville IV a success and move on to the next game? After the recent drama, I sort of feel like carrying the story further would be anticlimactic. We've already surpassed the longevity record (around 170 days), and have a healthy functioning base going, so it might be nice to give one colony a happy ending for a change. Plus it's almost Christmas, and not horrifically dying might be a nice Christmas gift.

If there's general agreement here, I'll go ahead and get started setting up the next game. If not, I can put it up to a poll.

Works for me, though maybe we should just kill off AB, because, well...self-evident.

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 12:53 pm

booooo

Rush2112 · Post by **Rush2112** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 1:20 pm

brian wrote: Works for me, though maybe we should just kill off AB, because, well...self-evident.

But he's slowly killing himself, which is really a gift to us all.

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 1:27 pm

bapo! wrote:
brian wrote:I think you guys are looking at the cannibal thing all wrong.
That's easy for you to say from the other side of the wall, but you don't know what it's like in here, man. We don't even have beer yet. I could really go for a Marshmallow IPA right about now.

This was the post where I decided to stop reading while eating lunch alone at the ramen shop. Couldn't stop giggling.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 2:14 pm

Looks like opinion is split on whether to wrap up the current game early, so I've put it to the poll above.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Thu Dec 22, 2016 2:45 pm

Looks like it really isn't!

Sounds like working towards self sabotage seems like an interesting idea.

Best moment of Swampvilles I-V