The Official Swamp Dating Thread

[The Sybian]

I'm not even dating for sex. I'd just like to find someone.

I'd be quick to say that is exactly the right attitude except I have no idea what single women want anymore. The dilemma could be that they don't quite know either. But I like to believe traditional reasons for long-term relationships haven't been replaced by some new and bizarre element beyond the obvious.

Join a curling club. Lots of single girls at curling clubs. You can show some degree of athleticism. It's a public place. I get hit on by the single women in my mixed league all the time, possibly because I don't wear a wedding ring but it could be that I'm so utterly dashing and suave and a such damn good curler. Really, though, they are remarkably social places. Every curling club in the world has a bar at which people congregate post-game and mingle. Even in my men's super-league, guys sit around after a two-hour game for almost another two hours downing pitchers and chatting. And with the women, odds are that they might at least "know someone" that just happens to show up for the social aspect. A huge percentage of curlers, especially over 30-years old, join curling clubs as a married couple, a dating couple, or as singles looking to meet someone. Just a thought.

Or get a Saluki. Because Salukis are chick magnets.

And worst case scenario, curling! Still thinking about joining a local league. Rass and Cerrano, you with me?

[degenerasian]

I'm not even dating for sex. I'd just like to find someone.

I'd be quick to say that is exactly the right attitude except I have no idea what single women want anymore. The dilemma could be that they don't quite know either. But I like to believe traditional reasons for long-term relationships haven't been replaced by some new and bizarre element beyond the obvious.

Join a curling club. Lots of single girls at curling clubs. You can show some degree of athleticism. It's a public place. I get hit on by the single women in my mixed league all the time, possibly because I don't wear a wedding ring but it could be that I'm so utterly dashing and suave and a such damn good curler. Really, though, they are remarkably social places. Every curling club in the world has a bar at which people congregate post-game and mingle. Even in my men's super-league, guys sit around after a two-hour game for almost another two hours downing pitchers and chatting. And with the women, odds are that they might at least "know someone" that just happens to show up for the social aspect. A huge percentage of curlers, especially over 30-years old, join curling clubs as a married couple, a dating couple, or as singles looking to meet someone. Just a thought.

Or get a Saluki. Because Salukis are chick magnets.

This is why I originally joined the pool league back in September. It's IN a bar!
Although it's probably nowhere near as social as a curling club. There are only 4 girls in the league of 30, 3 are married and the other is my platonic partner.

[Scottie]

This is why I originally joined the pool league back in September. It's IN a bar!
Although it's probably nowhere near as social as a curling club. There are only 4 girls in the league of 30, 3 are married and the other is my platonic partner.

Curling is a much different world. Pool is really a bar game. Curling is the national sport. And I'd guess that your average Curling club is a 50/50 mix of men and women.

And worst case scenario, curling! Still thinking about joining a local league. Rass and Cerrano, you with me?

Join, for sure! So much fun. Down the road we can arrange the first international Swamp Curling Bonspiel.

[sancarlos]

This weekend, the wife and I were invited by another couple to go to a wine tasting event at a local winery where they belong to their club. The other guy and I couldn't help noticing all the fine single talent at the event (of course, we had to be discreet with the wives with us, but we both noticed it.) So my advice to you single guys, is to go to a wine tasting event.

And, I second Scottie's comment about his Saluki. I'd extend it to any cute dog. When I am out and about, my dog is also a chick magnet, even though I'm not in the market.

[Gunpowder]

But then it shits on the ground and makes you pick it up

[The Sybian]

This weekend, the wife and I were invited by another couple to go to a wine tasting event at a local winery where they belong to their club. The other guy and I couldn't help noticing all the fine single talent at the event (of course, we had to be discreet with the wives with us, but we both noticed it.) So my advice to you single guys, is to go to a wine tasting event.

And, I second Scottie's comment about his Saluki. I'd extend it to any cute dog. When I am out and about, my dog is also a chick magnet, even though I'm not in the market.

Yeah, your dog is cool.

[Keg]

I third the comment about puppies. Women love taking pictures of Deebo when he is out and about (especially at a Starbucks or Corner Bakery type of joint).

[degenerasian]

I'm allergic to dogs :(

[Rush2112]

Hypoallergenic and awesome

[The Sybian]

Degen and Johnnie, here is some advice that may help you.

[Brontoburglar]

Ya'll are trying too hard. If you meet someone, you meet someone. If you don't, just have a drink and jerk off.

Pretty much.

The more you force it, the worse it goes.

[Johnnie]

Degen and Johnnie, here is some advice that may help you.

C'mon, son. You gotta try harder than Sean Connery on Celebrity Jeopardy with that photoshopped silliness (they even fucked up the comma):

[testy boxcar]

Ya'll are trying too hard. If you meet someone, you meet someone. If you don't, just have a drink and jerk off.

Pretty much.

The more you force it, the worse it goes.

That's my recollection from my single days. I also never hit on gals, and would make them make the first move, mainly cause I didn't want to be seen as a creepy racist (LADIES...), but also 'cause I couldn't be rejected! So sit back, crack some jokes, pet your dog, have a beer, and wash yourself in a sea of vagina.

THATS MY ADVICE.

[degenerasian]

Sitting at the bar last night before pool was about to start I got hit on by a gay guy.

So I got that going for me.

[The Sybian]

Sitting at the bar last night before pool was about to start I got hit on by a gay guy.

So I got that going for me.

Go for it. Just to break the streak. I am a big believer in the "when it rains, it pours" theory. Women can smell desperation. When you are in a slump, confidence is down. I found once I hooked up or dated one girl, I started getting approached by others, or at least had an easy time picking up other girls. Never tried it, but I'm sure it would work for gay sex just as well. I also think NYC and Hoboken were much easier places to meet girls, and higher quality girls. Girls are more forward, and they know how to dress and doll themselves up nicely. Either that, or hot chicks gravitate there.

Basically what I am telling you is, move to New York City and let the sea of vag wash over you. If you were serious about being rich, that really helps in New York.

Some serious advice a friends girlfriend told me in college, which I took to heart and believe in, you have to initiate physical contact at some point during the date. And the good bye hug doesn't count. A subtle arm touch as you laugh when she tells a joke, a hand on her shoulder as you push your way through a crowded bar. Something. Anything. It lets them know you are interested, and creates a spark if there is a possibility of anything being there. It seemed weird and forced at first, but quickly became second nature.

Or you can be like GPJ. The direct approach is key and works. And it's also a numbers game. As long as you aren't creepy, even the girls who reject you will be flattered or laugh. I've also learned that this is especially true when hitting on black girls. You need to be extremely direct and over the top aggressive, otherwise they don't realize you are hitting on them. At least that is what I have been told by several black girls I attempted to hit on. Sure, that is a huge generalization, but anecdotally true from my experience. I never did crack that code.

[testy boxcar]

Sitting at the bar last night before pool was about to start I got hit on by a gay guy.

So I got that going for me.

Go for it. Just to break the streak. I am a big believer in the "when it rains, it pours" theory. Women can smell desperation. When you are in a slump, confidence is down. I found once I hooked up or dated one girl, I started getting approached by others, or at least had an easy time picking up other girls. Never tried it, but I'm sure it would work for gay sex just as well. I also think NYC and Hoboken were much easier places to meet girls, and higher quality girls. Girls are more forward, and they know how to dress and doll themselves up nicely. Either that, or hot chicks gravitate there.

Basically what I am telling you is, move to New York City and let the sea of vag wash over you. If you were serious about being rich, that really helps in New York.

Some serious advice a friends girlfriend told me in college, which I took to heart and believe in, you have to initiate physical contact at some point during the date. And the good bye hug doesn't count. A subtle arm touch as you laugh when she tells a joke, a hand on her shoulder as you push your way through a crowded bar. Something. Anything. It lets them know you are interested, and creates a spark if there is a possibility of anything being there. It seemed weird and forced at first, but quickly became second nature.

Or you can be like GPJ. The direct approach is key and works. And it's also a numbers game. As long as you aren't creepy, even the girls who reject you will be flattered or laugh. I've also learned that this is especially true when hitting on black girls. You need to be extremely direct and over the top aggressive, otherwise they don't realize you are hitting on them. At least that is what I have been told by several black girls I attempted to hit on. Sure, that is a huge generalization, but anecdotally true from my experience. I never did crack that code.

Small of the back after opening a door for them. POWER MOVE.

[The Sybian]

Small of the back after opening a door for them. POWER MOVE.

Not sure if that is sarcasm, but that'll work. I think a small move like that is good on a first date, also lets you build up to a real power move. Hand on ass works better, though. In law school I went out with a group of friends to a club. Everyone left except for me and this super hot, super rich Cuban girl. Way out of my league. We were dancing and my hand accidentally brushed against her ass, and she pretty much sexually assaulted me then took me back to her place. Which was great, until her roommate came home. I had a huge crush on her roommate and was working that angle. Oh well, Cuban girl was way hotter anyways.

[rass]

Hey guys, a proposed NHL broadcast schedule was released. Degen doesn't need a woman anymore.

[Gunpowder]

My model may not be a universal model.

I actually would have no real advice for anybody because GPJ don't play games wit them hos, SON

[degenerasian]

Hey guys, a proposed NHL broadcast schedule was released. Degen doesn't need a woman anymore.

It's a Wednesday, Saturday, Sunday national schedule.

I still need a woman the other 4 days.

-----

Last date I did those power moves.. hand against back while opening doors. Hand on shoulder while passing by her to hang up our jackets and hand on her shoulder to move her to let another couple by. Then putting her jacket on her as we were leaving.

Nothing.. didn't even get me a phone call after that.

[Brontoburglar]

Had a good date tonight (like that recovery, Syb?) with a girl I messaged last week who was friends of a girl I went to Mizzou with.

Apparently, the two are best friends, and our mutual connection had (has?) a crush on me for a while. And I definitely had a crush on her in college and after. But as we all know, I was too scared to actually do something in college.

And earlier today I gave my mom instructions on who to contact to get the credit card on her Y account changed. And by doing so, I realized a few minutes later that I had asked my mom to call my ex-girlfriend, who is now in that position at the Y.

My life is apparently a really crappy and about-to-be-canceled sitcom.

[P.D.X.]

Got set up and went out with a girl Wednesday night. Nice Italian place.

You took someone you didn't even know to a dinner at a nice restaurant? You might as well have just written "TRY HARD" across your forehead with a sharpie.

You say you keeping getting the same results, but you're not changing anything about your game, are you? You're just doing the same thing over and over and hoping it will somehow work, when all evidence points to the contrary.

You need to shake things up and get out of your nice, soft-guy mold. You're doing nothing for the girls you go out with. Your type is a dime-a-dozen and you're no different from the last guy that took her out for dinner and drinks. Why the hell would she suddenly fall for you? You gotta consider your value as a man and ask "what do I have to offer?" Hint: it's not your cubicle job, your bank account, your fancy clothes, or the dinners you buy.

If I were you, I would take a mental break from dating and do something that raises your value above that of the average schlub. Get your ass to the gym is the first and easiest thing. It's not a cure-all but at least it will take away one of your mental blocks and boost your confidence. Secondly, do SOMETHING that makes you interesting as a person. Go travel for a couple of months, solo. Preferably 3rd world countries. Take martial arts or dance classes. Go to rock/punk/metal shows and chat up strangers and make new friends. (Don't go with your usual mates and stand in the corner getting drunk.) Find something you're passionate about and do some volunteer work. Read a fuck-ton of books on subjects you know nothing about. Etc. Etc.

You're 38, with means. Doing this will never be easier. The older you get, the more excuses you'll make to avoid making life changes.

[Gunpowder]

Get really awesome at Big Buck Hunter. Chicks dig that shit.

[degenerasian]

Wow that was 4 months ago.

I joined a pool league :)

[P.D.X.]

Wow that was 4 months ago.

I joined a pool league :)

Ballin'!

[P.D.X.]

Get really awesome at Big Buck Hunter. Chicks dig that shit.

Some truth to this. Always some skanks hanging around the Buckhunter machines.

[The Sybian]

Get really awesome at Big Buck Hunter. Chicks dig that shit.

Some truth to this. Always some skanks hanging around the Buckhunter machines.

That's hilarious. Simce you are in Canada, make sure to dress appropriately while playing:




Preferably with this hat:

[degenerasian]

Also sometimes when I get setup, the girl setting me up suggests going to this nice place or getting a gift.

All fails in the end.

I haven't seen anyone in 2014. Not really making an effort to. Busy with work and stuff.

[Brontoburglar]

Can't say I've ever been suggested to buy a gift on a first date. Is that a Canada thing?

[Scottie]

Can't say I've ever been suggested to buy a gift on a first date. Is that a Canada thing?

No. And I'm from the (by far) most "traditional" part of Canada. It is archaic. However, a hundred years ago it was not uncommon; if anyone could afford anything (that's what made the gift significant, one had to sacrifice to afford a gift, giving its giving some serious cred); that region has always been the poorest part of Canada.

That having been said, it may have been reborn among smaller pockets of Asian communities.

[degenerasian]

Probably more a chinese thing. Nothing huge. A small box of chocolates for example.

[Johnnie]

I stopped seeing that 19 year old from France. We had fun together, but ultimately I got meh over the relationship. I wasn't looking at it being more than just a short term thing or whatever and I could tell she wanted more than that. Oh well. I kind of feel like a dick because she's a good person.

Yesterday a girl I work with told me that she assumes I'm always getting laid because of the "picture I paint due to my air of 'Fuck you. I'm getting laid.'" She then labeled me the "Pussy Picasso" because of it. I couldn't stop laughing. I didn't realize I give off that vibe to some people. I'm not very open with my personal life at work, so I'm guessing that people need to create some sort of narrative of my life and that's hers. I was caught off guard with that so I had no witty comeback. Thinking about it today, I feel like I'm more of a Pussy Bob Ross painting happy little vaginas, personally.

Last Sunday I met another girl online and went out for drinks. We seemed to be hitting it off chatting back and forth via text. But as soon as we met I could tell she wasn't really attracted to me. Just something of a letdown face she made. I picked up on it immediately. I thought she was cool, but she suddenly stopped being chatty or saying much. I figured I was just a lame ass during the date. I have a tendency to be more interesting via text than in person. I've sent texts to her in the days since, but you can tell she's only responding back to them out of decency and doesn't really care to say anything at all.

[testuser2]

I've sent texts to her in the days since, but you can tell she's only responding back to them out of decency and doesn't really care to say anything at all.

Time for pics of your junk. Go big or go home.

[The Sybian]

I've sent texts to her in the days since, but you can tell she's only responding back to them out of decency and doesn't really care to say anything at all.

Show some humility and stop texting her. If she isn't interested, let it go and move on.

[degenerasian]

The blonde at work that rejected me, today was her last day. I didn't even know.
I sure made an impression!

[Brontoburglar]

What's with girls now saying that they're not good enough for you as a reason to try to kill off something? it's like the self-esteem murderer version of "it's not you, it's me."

I got the "I'm not sure I can give you what you deserve" last night out of the middle of nowhere. That was a new one. Those fucking combine videos have set the bar too damn high for women, apparently.

[degenerasian]

I've heard that one.

If you super journalist can't get anyone none of us remaining singles have any hope.

[Shirley]

"I'm not sure I can give you what you deserve"

What, a threesome?

[Rush2112]

I've heard that one.

If you super journalist can't get anyone none of us remaining singles have any hope.

C'mon now. I'm an overweight balding librarian and I've been married twice to two very hot women.

[degenerasian]

I've heard that one.

If you super journalist can't get anyone none of us remaining singles have any hope.

C'mon now. I'm an overweight balding librarian and I've been married twice to two very hot women.

But you are not single now. It's a different world in 2014.