Ridiculous Things You Read On Facebook

Nonlinear FC · Post by **Nonlinear FC** » Wed Apr 03, 2019 9:08 am

I have a number of (female) friends on Fb that post pictures of their dog taking up too much space in their bed.

I don't fucking get that. Kick the fucking dog out of your bed, for fuck's sake.

Curious if any of you guys allow that nonsense. I truly don't get it. I used to let my mom's cats sleep in my bed, but that's because it was cold as fuck in MI and they don't take up much space.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Wed Apr 03, 2019 10:44 am

Izzy gets the run of the house except for our bed and the nice couch in the living room.

Not hard to train a dog to stay off these things.

rass · Post by **rass** » Wed Apr 03, 2019 11:02 am

He used to be trained to stay off the bed, but when he got old and grey enough my wife started inviting him up and I stopped fighting her. He pretty much knows to stay on her side of the bed.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Wed Apr 03, 2019 11:12 am

I logged in the other day to just see how the cess pool is going. It's still much the same, but luckily every post isn't political. But there are too many videos that just start playing and too many advertisements.

I don't have messenger or the Facebook app on my phone, so I log in via the website. What sucks is I can't read my messages that way so I then have to use a URL that forces a desktop set up.

Ultimately, I'm glad I've 97% disconnected from the shit because I know I'd get in trouble at some point because of what I say. Maybe when I'm done and retired I'll comment again, but whatever. That's a couple years away.

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Wed Apr 03, 2019 11:49 am

Our dog has the run of the house - except she is not allowed on our bed or our daughter's bed. No problems, there.

We have three cats and one of them occasionally sleeps next to my wife on the edge away from me. So, I can live with that. All three of them occasionally hang out on top of the bed during the day.

Nonlinear FC · Post by **Nonlinear FC** » Wed Apr 03, 2019 1:55 pm

Ok, faith restored. I just had a run of 3 different ppl posting faux frustrated pictures of their dogs taking up too much room in their bed and I just don't understand it.

I love our dog, fiercely. She ain't gettin' on my bed.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Wed Apr 03, 2019 2:00 pm

I think the issue is if you start to let them, its really hard to reverse course.

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Wed May 01, 2019 7:42 am

I just lurk now anyway but nothing, not even politics, has come this close to getting me to log off forever - I just saw someone say "kuto's" instead of "kudos"

Brontoburglar · Post by **Brontoburglar** » Wed May 01, 2019 8:14 am

Ryan wrote: ↑Wed May 01, 2019 7:42 am I just lurk now anyway but nothing, not even politics, has come this close to getting me to log off forever - I just saw someone say "kuto's" instead of "kudos"

imagine them saying that on the secret crush facebook dating app thing

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Wed May 01, 2019 11:28 am

Brontoburglar wrote: ↑Wed May 01, 2019 8:14 am the secret crush facebook dating app thing

Possibly Facebook's worst idea, yet.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Tue May 21, 2019 2:20 pm

Commenter under Buttigieg article:

This guy is becoming creepier by the day; he's taking extremist positions just like the other Dems who are stepping all over their leftist feet.

Original poster asks what's creepy...

Reparations, abolish electoral college, single-payer universal healthcare, etc.

Not one Dem is worthy of the presidency and most are deserving of only contempt and revulsion. Living in CT means that whomever the Dem candidate is will win the EC in my state, so my non-vote for president literally makes no difference.

bfj · Post by **bfj** » Mon Jul 29, 2019 4:49 pm

Regarding Ljam’s comment on Brian’s FB post about his TV interview. Wasn’t it rballer who wore the gloves?

Not really ridiculous, but not sure where else to put this.

L-Jam3 · Post by **L-Jam3** » Mon Jul 29, 2019 5:00 pm

Damn. You’re right. I always thought it was Brian, and I even mentioned as much when I met him and Rams Fan.

Post by **brian** » Mon Jul 29, 2019 5:40 pm

L-Jam3 wrote: ↑Mon Jul 29, 2019 5:00 pm Damn. You’re right. I always thought it was Brian, and I even mentioned as much when I met him and Rams Fan.

It's funny, but I don't remember that. Or if I did I probably just assumed you were tooling on rballer because what we do when we get together with Swampers is talk about other Swampers.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Thu Oct 03, 2019 7:04 am

From a woman who I barely knew in high school:

A man befriended me on facebook. There was no photo attached to his profile. He began messaging me recently: happy birthday, happy jewish new year...so I responded, politely. I then asked that he put a photo to his profile and he said he would email me his photo. I asked why he didn't have any photos, and this was his response:
"because as you may or may not know I'm married and not looking to change. I like my wife and we get along but there's little sex, health reasons. I'm very discreet so no public photo. btw I totally respect you may not be comfortable with this and if so wish you all the best. otherwise love to continue our conversation."

Such a gentleman...he respects me if I do not wish to be his "concubine". As a single woman in her 50s, I appreciate that I am not a commodity...generally men seek out younger women and I am extremely young at heart and active, so I'm not looking to be a caregiver...but random virtue testing and proposals to be the "other woman" is, insulting, and disrespectful...there are websites for "cheaters" and I, for one, do not stray (I confess that when I was 17 and my boyfriend and I were at separate camps, I did cheat...the only time and I did confess to him then and within the last two years again).

Dating at my age is challenging enough, adding one more layer of being the other woman is not something I, or most women my age are craving.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu Oct 03, 2019 7:16 am

Sorry it didn’t work, Pruitt.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Thu Oct 03, 2019 7:21 am

mister d wrote: ↑Thu Oct 03, 2019 7:16 am Sorry it didn’t work, Pruitt.

There goes the coffee!

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Fri Oct 04, 2019 5:06 am

Same woman - last night's post:

True story: it happened again! Another guy, just celebrated his anniversary with his wife and messaged me this evening that he is impressed with my intelligence and beauty and send a huge emoji saying “I like you”. Did he not read my post? Did I seem like I was kidding? How was I not transparent? So, for the record, I will not engage in an affair with a man who is involved in a relationship with someone else. I will not do it in a house, Beside a mouse, on the bed, in a sled, I will not do it ever, that means zero chance. That means never. And in case you don’t understand, not a chance.

Post by **brian** » Fri Oct 04, 2019 9:42 am

Geez, at some point just be flattered someone likes you and then defriend them and move on. No one wants to hear about how you're having to swat away suitors with a stick, lady.

DSafetyGuy · Post by **DSafetyGuy** » Fri Oct 04, 2019 9:43 am

I enjoy this non-traditional manner she's using to fish for an affair.

BSF21 · Post by **BSF21** » Fri Oct 04, 2019 9:46 am

We get it. You fuck. Move along.

EnochRoot · Post by **EnochRoot** » Fri Oct 04, 2019 9:51 am

“Don’t you have a close friend you can share this crap with over a bottle of wine? This is a place for photos of your kid, or for updates about how you hit the gym at 6:15 in the morning.”

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Wed Oct 09, 2019 9:06 am

My ultra-conservative, not so convinced he's very well informed BIL just posted a disproven Socrates Quote - "When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the enemy."

Totally on brand.

EnochRoot · Post by **EnochRoot** » Wed Oct 09, 2019 9:21 am

A_B wrote: ↑Wed Oct 09, 2019 9:06 am My ultra-conservative, not so convinced he's very well informed BIL just posted a disproven Socrates Quote - "When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the enemy."

Totally on brand.

“Yeah, Biden’s son’s time on that corporation’s board of directors doesn’t even line up with JB’s time as VP, and the whole point of removing that one guy was roundly approved and encouraged by all allies. Excellent point!”

Post by **brian** » Thu Oct 10, 2019 3:28 pm

This came up in my Facebook feed and I was at the game but I remember very little about it because I was dropped acid before the game and was zonked 10 ways from Sunday. But I was there. I know that. Actually probably not too far out of frame to the right here. (I obviously can't mention that on Facebook. My mom and aunts and whatnot are on there.)

TT2.0 · Post by **TT2.0** » Fri Oct 11, 2019 6:05 pm

brian wrote: ↑Thu Oct 10, 2019 3:28 pm This came up in my Facebook feed and I was at the game but I remember very little about it because I was dropped acid before the game and was zonked 10 ways from Sunday. But I was there. I know that. Actually probably not too far out of frame to the right here. (I obviously can't mention that on Facebook. My mom and aunts and whatnot are on there.)

Thats really cool. I imagine Crane Lights on acid would also be cool

bfj · Post by **bfj** » Fri Oct 11, 2019 7:36 pm

Took in an O’s game on a large amount of mushrooms one night. That white ball left many trails and the field was undulating.

Post by **brian** » Fri Oct 11, 2019 10:09 pm

TT2.0 wrote: ↑Fri Oct 11, 2019 6:05 pm
brian wrote: ↑Thu Oct 10, 2019 3:28 pm This came up in my Facebook feed and I was at the game but I remember very little about it because I was dropped acid before the game and was zonked 10 ways from Sunday. But I was there. I know that. Actually probably not too far out of frame to the right here. (I obviously can't mention that on Facebook. My mom and aunts and whatnot are on there.)

Thats really cool. I imagine Crane Lights on acid would also be cool

They only light the field and it’s dark as shit in the stands, way darker than even a rock concert which is beyond fucked up for a sporting event. Really sinister.

Of course that could just be the acid talking.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Oct 15, 2019 9:49 am

She's back!

I am goal orientated. So, for my 45th birthday, I decided to compete in Ironman Canada. I had eight months to do so, having never competed in a triathlon. I trained twice a day, in the pool, on the bike, on the treadmill. In the midst of it, my whole world collapsed: six weeks prior to the race, my husband left me and for another woman. (the other woman, was most likely the symptom). For me, trust is everything. Just before the race, I found out that he had been having an affair for at least a year (the phone records were the evidence). Suffice it to say that my mind was nowhere in the competition,but instead, embroiled in trying to save a marriage that could not be saved. On the day of the race, I just needed a good workout. I left him on the mountain, and completed it in 14 hours, 48 minutes.
Ten years later, here I am. I took it personally, blamed myself, thought what I had done to make him stray. I can count on my fingers and toes the number of relationships and encounters since, that were affected by my experience. No more. As my father always said, today is day 1.
I have always wanted to compete in the Boston Marathon, but never believed I could qualify.
So, for my 55th birthday year, I hope to qualify for Boston, 2021. It is my victory lap, and I sure am going to do my best to qualify.
Fear is what will prevent you from achieving your goals. Fear will destroy you. I no longer am fearful, of qualifying, or of life. Life is precious and fleeting, and it is your time, right now.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Tue Oct 15, 2019 10:09 am

Posts like that for me are simultaneously the scene in Hitch when Will Smith, in the rain, says to his crush while she's making out with a dude "What have I done???" And the guy is like "You're doing it right now."

And the scene in The Truman Show when he's becoming self aware and his wife is doing an ad for some product and he's like "Who are you talking to?"

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Oct 15, 2019 10:24 am

Johnnie wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 10:09 am Posts like that for me are simultaneously the scene in Hitch when Will Smith, in the rain, says to his crush while she's making out with a dude "What have I done???" And the guy is like "You're doing it right now."

And the scene in The Truman Show when he's becoming self aware and his wife is doing an ad for some product and he's like "Who are you talking to?"

Ha!

"Fleabag" has scenes like that too.

ETA: Just a matter of time before she starts referring to herself in the 3rd person.

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Tue Oct 15, 2019 4:33 pm

Pruitt wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 9:49 am She's back!

I am goal orientated. So, for my 45th birthday, I decided to compete in Ironman Canada. I had eight months to do so, having never competed in a triathlon. I trained twice a day, in the pool, on the bike, on the treadmill. In the midst of it, my whole world collapsed: six weeks prior to the race, my husband left me and for another woman. (the other woman, was most likely the symptom). For me, trust is everything. Just before the race, I found out that he had been having an affair for at least a year (the phone records were the evidence). Suffice it to say that my mind was nowhere in the competition,but instead, embroiled in trying to save a marriage that could not be saved. On the day of the race, I just needed a good workout. I left him on the mountain, and completed it in 14 hours, 48 minutes.
Ten years later, here I am. I took it personally, blamed myself, thought what I had done to make him stray. I can count on my fingers and toes the number of relationships and encounters since, that were affected by my experience. No more. As my father always said, today is day 1.
I have always wanted to compete in the Boston Marathon, but never believed I could qualify.
So, for my 55th birthday year, I hope to qualify for Boston, 2021. It is my victory lap, and I sure am going to do my best to qualify.
Fear is what will prevent you from achieving your goals. Fear will destroy you. I no longer am fearful, of qualifying, or of life. Life is precious and fleeting, and it is your time, right now.

I want to respond by telling her how much her story inspires me. How I've never cheated on my wife, but I am so moved by her words, I must have an affair with her.

BSF21 · Post by **BSF21** » Tue Oct 15, 2019 4:40 pm

The Sybian wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 4:33 pm
Pruitt wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 9:49 am She's back!

I am goal orientated. So, for my 45th birthday, I decided to compete in Ironman Canada. I had eight months to do so, having never competed in a triathlon. I trained twice a day, in the pool, on the bike, on the treadmill. In the midst of it, my whole world collapsed: six weeks prior to the race, my husband left me and for another woman. (the other woman, was most likely the symptom). For me, trust is everything. Just before the race, I found out that he had been having an affair for at least a year (the phone records were the evidence). Suffice it to say that my mind was nowhere in the competition,but instead, embroiled in trying to save a marriage that could not be saved. On the day of the race, I just needed a good workout. I left him on the mountain, and completed it in 14 hours, 48 minutes.
Ten years later, here I am. I took it personally, blamed myself, thought what I had done to make him stray. I can count on my fingers and toes the number of relationships and encounters since, that were affected by my experience. No more. As my father always said, today is day 1.
I have always wanted to compete in the Boston Marathon, but never believed I could qualify.
So, for my 55th birthday year, I hope to qualify for Boston, 2021. It is my victory lap, and I sure am going to do my best to qualify.
Fear is what will prevent you from achieving your goals. Fear will destroy you. I no longer am fearful, of qualifying, or of life. Life is precious and fleeting, and it is your time, right now.

I want to respond by telling her how much her story inspires me. How I've never cheated on my wife, but I am so moved by her words, I must have an affair with her.

+1

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Tue Oct 15, 2019 4:43 pm

The Sybian wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 4:33 pm
Pruitt wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 9:49 am She's back!

I am goal orientated. So, for my 45th birthday, I decided to compete in Ironman Canada. I had eight months to do so, having never competed in a triathlon. I trained twice a day, in the pool, on the bike, on the treadmill. In the midst of it, my whole world collapsed: six weeks prior to the race, my husband left me and for another woman. (the other woman, was most likely the symptom). For me, trust is everything. Just before the race, I found out that he had been having an affair for at least a year (the phone records were the evidence). Suffice it to say that my mind was nowhere in the competition,but instead, embroiled in trying to save a marriage that could not be saved. On the day of the race, I just needed a good workout. I left him on the mountain, and completed it in 14 hours, 48 minutes.
Ten years later, here I am. I took it personally, blamed myself, thought what I had done to make him stray. I can count on my fingers and toes the number of relationships and encounters since, that were affected by my experience. No more. As my father always said, today is day 1.
I have always wanted to compete in the Boston Marathon, but never believed I could qualify.
So, for my 55th birthday year, I hope to qualify for Boston, 2021. It is my victory lap, and I sure am going to do my best to qualify.
Fear is what will prevent you from achieving your goals. Fear will destroy you. I no longer am fearful, of qualifying, or of life. Life is precious and fleeting, and it is your time, right now.

I want to respond by telling her how much her story inspires me. How I've never cheated on my wife, but I am so moved by her words, I must have an affair with her.

Syb, please create a fake FB account, get Pruitt to friend you and allow you access to her post, then put up your post!

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Oct 15, 2019 5:11 pm

She looks good for a woman of 55 or so.

But she reminds me of the old joke:

Why do Jewish men die before their wives?

Because they want to.

tennbengal · Post by **tennbengal** » Wed Oct 30, 2019 9:20 am

Those of you that follow me saw my "why I am leaving manifesto"...I have had one friend reach out and suggest mewe as an alternative. At quick glance it seems 'aight. Anyone of you all try it before? Any thoughts?

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Wed Oct 30, 2019 9:33 am

I keep wanting to do it but I know I'll end up asking my wife once per week to check something on the town facebook page. Its so bad.

tennbengal · Post by **tennbengal** » Wed Oct 30, 2019 9:37 am

mister d wrote: ↑Wed Oct 30, 2019 9:33 am I keep wanting to do it but I know I'll end up asking my wife once per week to check something on the town facebook page. Its so bad.

You can leave and she can stay? At least partially stick it to the man?

It's just, man, Facebook is almost pure distilled evil at this point.

L-Jam3 · Post by **L-Jam3** » Wed Oct 30, 2019 9:37 am

The only thing stopping me is the number of things I have stupidly connected to my FB account. It's not like I could give half a damn to 90% of the people on there, or them to me.

tennbengal · Post by **tennbengal** » Wed Oct 30, 2019 9:45 am

Maybe a bunch of us swampers could try the mewe thing and form a group there as an alternative to the Facebook group and test it out for a bit?

Their privacy policy seems pretty damn good and a quick search on the founder shows he seems to be a privacy advocate:

https://mewe.com/privacy