You haven't seen me fuck!
The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Moderators: Shirley, Sabo, brian, rass, DaveInSeattle
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Rass to Mrs. Rass: "You wanna lil' sugar in that oatmeal?" (arches left eyebrow)
Rass child: "DAD, stop it."
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
[Rass makes cinnamon rolls]
Rass: "That reminds me of our honeymom LOL."
Mrs Rass: [wipes 8 ounces of icing off her face]
Rass: "That reminds me of our honeymom LOL."
Mrs Rass: [wipes 8 ounces of icing off her face]
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
And his one problem is he didn’t go to Russia that night because he had extracurricular activities, and they froze to death.
- A_B
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Co-worker got into a tussle at Kroger this morning over TP. He had some in his cart (I don't know how much, but Kroger has been limiting it to one package per person, so I assume just the one) and a guy came and tried to take it from him.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
![Image](https://miro.medium.com/max/612/1*sz3x5iKbBV_iJ2-47CmfIA.jpeg)
Dances with Wolves (1) - BSF
"This place was rockin'," said BSF21.
"There is nothing ever uncommon about BSF21."
"This place was rockin'," said BSF21.
"There is nothing ever uncommon about BSF21."
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
My daughter came in and told me a "Little Johnnie" joke. It's way too long to type, but eventually ended with a blowjob joke. I stared at her to gauge her reaction while trying hard not to laugh, because it was funny. She broke first saying, "yeah, I don't get it." I think she was looking for an explanation, but expected she wasn't going to get one.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Wanted to make a "more like Zoom out" joke but it seemed at odds with my lame fuck joke earlier. And "Zoom in" is just piling on myself.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Thanks for this link. Watched a documentary on the Arsenal Invincibles season last night. Can't believe it's been 15 years! Back in those days, you'd only get one or two games a week on TV. I was living in NYC, so whenever Arsenal wasn't on, I'd walk to an Irish pub with a satellite dish, sit down with a full Irish breakfast and enjoy the atmosphere of a pub full of drunken Brits screaming at 7:30 in the morning. Brought back a lot of happy nostalgia. I actually forgot how truly dominant Henry was back then. Sure, he was the best player in the league, but god damn, the shit he pulled off was astounding! I remember always feeling confident tied or down one, no matter how bad the team looked, you just knew Henry would manufacture a goal or two out of nothing.DaveInSeattle wrote: ↑Tue Mar 17, 2020 10:21 am
[OC] Are you horribly bored? Are your weekends now hollow without football? Are you fed up with angrily debating what might happen to football leagues across the world? Perhaps this could help a little – I made a list of over 100 football documentaries to help pass the time.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
So how did I spend my quarantine Saturday? Doing yardwork and moving about 1000lbs of gravel from the GF's car to the backyard.
Now I'm going to sit on the front porch, torture my neighbors with my terrible guitar playing, and drink about 65 beers.
Now I'm going to sit on the front porch, torture my neighbors with my terrible guitar playing, and drink about 65 beers.
- A_B
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Love it. Strum that shit!DaveInSeattle wrote: ↑Sat Mar 21, 2020 6:55 pm So how did I spend my quarantine Saturday? Doing yardwork and moving about 1000lbs of gravel from the GF's car to the backyard.
Now I'm going to sit on the front porch, torture my neighbors with my terrible guitar playing, and drink about 65 beers.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Its funny...I stopped taking lessons back in October (I got a kid in private school! I can't afford that anymore!) and haven't played hardly at all since then, but its come back pretty easy in the last few days. Except I've lost the calluses on my fingertips.A_B wrote: ↑Sat Mar 21, 2020 9:06 pmLove it. Strum that shit!DaveInSeattle wrote: ↑Sat Mar 21, 2020 6:55 pm So how did I spend my quarantine Saturday? Doing yardwork and moving about 1000lbs of gravel from the GF's car to the backyard.
Now I'm going to sit on the front porch, torture my neighbors with my terrible guitar playing, and drink about 65 beers.
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Made barbacoa with beef short ribs tonight:
https://cafedelites.com/slow-cooker-bar ... rib-tacos/
This shit was good! I mostly followed the recipe. Had 2 lbs of short ribs to work with but that doesn’t matter. Used one small can of the chipotles in adobo sauce. Added chopped celery. Slow cooked for 8 hours on slow instead of the recommended 10-11. A bit hot for a white guy like me but very balanced.
I served with fajita-style peppers and onions and a bag of Vigo Spanish rice, but it will work with anything.
https://cafedelites.com/slow-cooker-bar ... rib-tacos/
This shit was good! I mostly followed the recipe. Had 2 lbs of short ribs to work with but that doesn’t matter. Used one small can of the chipotles in adobo sauce. Added chopped celery. Slow cooked for 8 hours on slow instead of the recommended 10-11. A bit hot for a white guy like me but very balanced.
I served with fajita-style peppers and onions and a bag of Vigo Spanish rice, but it will work with anything.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
The short documentary "Who Let The Dogs Out" is fun. About the various claims of copyright for that song - but it's more interesting than that sounds...
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
watched the first episode of the netflix doc about joe exotic last night. good lord. it's really good. and so screwed up.
"We're not the smartest people in the world. We go down the straightaway and turn left. That's literally what we do." -- Clint Bowyer
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
I'm pretty deep into it, and buckle up Bronto... Shit goes off the rails.Brontoburglar wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 10:38 am watched the first episode of the netflix doc about joe exotic last night. good lord. it's really good. and so screwed up.
You can lead a horse to fish, but you can't fish out a horse.
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Is that the tiger one?
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yes. I was familiar with the general story (I read a bunch of stuff about him a while back) but damn, we were riveted
"We're not the smartest people in the world. We go down the straightaway and turn left. That's literally what we do." -- Clint Bowyer
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
hell yesNonlinear FC wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 10:43 amI'm pretty deep into it, and buckle up Bronto... Shit goes off the rails.Brontoburglar wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 10:38 am watched the first episode of the netflix doc about joe exotic last night. good lord. it's really good. and so screwed up.
"We're not the smartest people in the world. We go down the straightaway and turn left. That's literally what we do." -- Clint Bowyer
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Come back here and check back in when you're ready. I can't even describe it to my wife, because there are almost too many plot twists.Brontoburglar wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 2:01 pmhell yesNonlinear FC wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 10:43 amI'm pretty deep into it, and buckle up Bronto... Shit goes off the rails.Brontoburglar wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 10:38 am watched the first episode of the netflix doc about joe exotic last night. good lord. it's really good. and so screwed up.
Put it this way, it wouldn't pass muster as a throw away Netflix movie. Wouldn't even get past the synopsis reading.
You can lead a horse to fish, but you can't fish out a horse.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Longform article about Joe Exotic from Texas Monthly from their June 2019 article, comes with audio version.
“All I'm sayin' is, he comes near me, I'll put him in the wall.”
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
episode 3 got wildNonlinear FC wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 2:19 pmCome back here and check back in when you're ready. I can't even describe it to my wife, because there are almost too many plot twists.Brontoburglar wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 2:01 pmhell yesNonlinear FC wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 10:43 amI'm pretty deep into it, and buckle up Bronto... Shit goes off the rails.Brontoburglar wrote: ↑Mon Mar 23, 2020 10:38 am watched the first episode of the netflix doc about joe exotic last night. good lord. it's really good. and so screwed up.
Put it this way, it wouldn't pass muster as a throw away Netflix movie. Wouldn't even get past the synopsis reading.
"We're not the smartest people in the world. We go down the straightaway and turn left. That's literally what we do." -- Clint Bowyer
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Wondery is doing a podcast series on Joe Exotic
https://wondery.com/shows/joe-exotic/
https://wondery.com/shows/joe-exotic/
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
The Woman's birthday was yesterday so we did a carryout from one of the local Lexington landmarks. In addition to a tip, they had a line item on the receipt for "Team Member Assistance Fund" where you could put a bit extra that was being shared among workers who might be furloughed. I tossed a few bucks there as well. And from the looks of the parking lot they were doing brisk business. Had 12 drive up spots and I'd say 8-10 were filled at any time while I was waiting.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
I like that they could add that line item.
I tried going to my favorite restaurant in town to do something similar, (they normally don't do takeout, but have set up a limited menu in these times), and by the time I called each day, they'd sold out of everything. I've never been happier to NOT get a meal.
On Saturday, we got takeout from Bern's (white tablecloth, steakhouse and wine Tampa establishment) for my birthday. It was nearly as delicious as eating in the dining room. They also are scrambling to set up take out, and upon arrival had a 6ft table set up with bottles of wine to take home. Got a great 2011 Zinfandel for less than what it is going for online.
I tried going to my favorite restaurant in town to do something similar, (they normally don't do takeout, but have set up a limited menu in these times), and by the time I called each day, they'd sold out of everything. I've never been happier to NOT get a meal.
On Saturday, we got takeout from Bern's (white tablecloth, steakhouse and wine Tampa establishment) for my birthday. It was nearly as delicious as eating in the dining room. They also are scrambling to set up take out, and upon arrival had a 6ft table set up with bottles of wine to take home. Got a great 2011 Zinfandel for less than what it is going for online.
Until everything is less insane, I'm mixing weed with wine.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
For lomes: Be careful, there is a link going around for a live stream of Bono doing a gig live from his home! DO NOT CLICK THE LINK! It will take you to a live stream of Bono doing a gig live from his home.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
I kinda liked it
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Starting our Zoom Meeting (with over 100 participants) for doing our Agile "Big Room Planning" for the next Program Increment. What a fiasco...
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Would the normal meeting for this be over 100 people?DaveInSeattle wrote: ↑Tue Mar 24, 2020 11:15 am Starting our Zoom Meeting (with over 100 participants) for doing our Agile "Big Room Planning" for the next Program Increment. What a fiasco...
To quote both Bruce Prichard and Tony Schiavone, "Fuck Duff Meltzer."
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Yes..initially...and then break out sessions.duff wrote: ↑Tue Mar 24, 2020 11:35 amWould the normal meeting for this be over 100 people?DaveInSeattle wrote: ↑Tue Mar 24, 2020 11:15 am Starting our Zoom Meeting (with over 100 participants) for doing our Agile "Big Room Planning" for the next Program Increment. What a fiasco...
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Oh wow, can't even imagine. Scrum with 10 people is bad enough.DaveInSeattle wrote: ↑Tue Mar 24, 2020 11:15 am Starting our Zoom Meeting (with over 100 participants) for doing our Agile "Big Room Planning" for the next Program Increment. What a fiasco...
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Daughter had a new joke yesterday:
Daughter: how many wings does a black chicken have?
Me: two
D: how many beaks does a black chicken have?
Me: one
D: how many feet does a black chicken have?
Me: 2
D: how many whiskers does a white cat have?
Me: I have no idea
D: why do you know so much about black cocks and nothing about white pussy?
I tried so hard not to laugh. She had a huge grin and said she doesn’t get why it’s funny. I had to cover my face. My son chimes in, saying he would explain, but he didn’t have a clue either.
I think I need to ban TikTok
Daughter: how many wings does a black chicken have?
Me: two
D: how many beaks does a black chicken have?
Me: one
D: how many feet does a black chicken have?
Me: 2
D: how many whiskers does a white cat have?
Me: I have no idea
D: why do you know so much about black cocks and nothing about white pussy?
I tried so hard not to laugh. She had a huge grin and said she doesn’t get why it’s funny. I had to cover my face. My son chimes in, saying he would explain, but he didn’t have a clue either.
I think I need to ban TikTok
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
I am barely paying attention. Actually trying to work while its ongoing...phxgators wrote: ↑Tue Mar 24, 2020 12:10 pmOh wow, can't even imagine. Scrum with 10 people is bad enough.DaveInSeattle wrote: ↑Tue Mar 24, 2020 11:15 am Starting our Zoom Meeting (with over 100 participants) for doing our Agile "Big Room Planning" for the next Program Increment. What a fiasco...
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
I think mine is pretty good (Oct 29th).
e: Also, Feb 30th not being an actual day is probably for the best.
e: Also, Feb 30th not being an actual day is probably for the best.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
Roy Hodgson and I will be appearing on Tik Tok shortly.
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Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
I don't even know what a Neil Warnock is, but he and I are about to get really really close. (February)
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
Re: The OFFICIAL 2020 Self-Quarantine Thread
OLE OUT
THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH GALA LUNCHEONS, LAD!