OFFICIAL getting it in the butt thread

[sancarlos]

I have my first one tomorrow afternoon at 3:30. No food today or tomorrow which I'm struggling with more than I thought I would.

I originally wanted to schedule mine for first thing in the morning so I didn't have to go nearly 2 days without eating but my sister advised me to get it done in the afternoon so I don't have wake up in the middle of the night to drink four-hour-before stuff.

With how much technology has advanced you'd think there would be a better/easier/less inconvenient way to do this.

Good luck, GK! I might have mentioned it when we were together, but my strategy is always to start the cleanse early, so I go to bed already cleaned out, then have the procedure first thing when they open in the morning.

[Steve of phpBB]

I have my first one tomorrow afternoon at 3:30. No food today or tomorrow which I'm struggling with more than I thought I would.

I originally wanted to schedule mine for first thing in the morning so I didn't have to go nearly 2 days without eating but my sister advised me to get it done in the afternoon so I don't have wake up in the middle of the night to drink four-hour-before stuff.

With how much technology has advanced you'd think there would be a better/easier/less inconvenient way to do this.

Good luck, GK! I might have mentioned it when we were together, but my strategy is always to start the cleanse early, so I go to bed already cleaned out, then have the procedure first thing when they open in the morning.

Yeah, it's been a while for me, but I remember it as "night before" stuff, not "four hours before".

[The Sybian]

A couple weeks ago I received a Cologuard box in the mail and 3 days later an email from my insurance company telling me they are sending one and it's 100% covered. Wasn't sure if it was a scam at first. I think this is the thing where you put a stool sample in a jar and mail it off to a lab. It's supposed to replace a colonoscopy, but from my very brief research, it comes back with a high number of false positives, so it's still sitting in the corner of my home office.

[GoodKarma]

A couple weeks ago I received a Cologuard box in the mail and 3 days later an email from my insurance company telling me they are sending one and it's 100% covered. Wasn't sure if it was a scam at first. I think this is the thing where you put a stool sample in a jar and mail it off to a lab. It's supposed to replace a colonoscopy, but from my very brief research, it comes back with a high number of false positives, so it's still sitting in the corner of my home office.

I had a friend tell me this morning her doctor said it was ok to use Cologuard instead of a colonoscopy which I find hard to believe.

Another reason why I scheduled for afternoon is to avoid having to take a PTO day...I'm kind of limited in my vacation time so I figured this was good compromise. Drinking 7up now and that helps with the hunger. Jello did not.

[sancarlos]

A couple weeks ago I received a Cologuard box in the mail and 3 days later an email from my insurance company telling me they are sending one and it's 100% covered. Wasn't sure if it was a scam at first. I think this is the thing where you put a stool sample in a jar and mail it off to a lab. It's supposed to replace a colonoscopy, but from my very brief research, it comes back with a high number of false positives, so it's still sitting in the corner of my home office.

I got one of those in the mail from my insurance company. My pcp said it’s ok not to do it, as he wants me to get a colonoscopy next year. If the fecal sample shows a problem, your doc will want a follow up colonoscopy, which will then be diagnostic rather than preventive and thus subject to more stringent insurance costs. Plus, I wonder if insurance would decline to cover a colonoscopy, saying that the fecal scan took its place.

[A_B]

I think the cologuard is more of an addition than a replacement. Maybe puts off the real deal for a bit and can flag anything important that maybe the doctors would recognize and decide to treat.

Also, if the insurance company sent it unsolicited fuck that. That's how they get you.

[Giff]

Two weeks ago, a good friend of mine went through the whole clear out process (and live texted it to us in a group chat) only to show up and they didn't have him on the colonoscopy schedule, only the prep schedule. Then they called him back about 30 minutes after he walked out of the office angrily and said, "we can fit you in if you haven't eaten anything". He'd eaten something in the meantime.

I would rage.

[Nonlinear FC]

1) You can use Cologuard if you don't have family history. I have family history, so it's not an option for me.

2) I just had my second one last month. It's one of those things where you just have to deal with it for 8 or so hours and then the actual procedure is nothing.

My night before was just non-stop and not fun. But, you know, not the end of the world.

[P.D.X.]

Worst part is having to be wheelchaired out to your ride after.

[Johnnie]

I just saw a Cologuard commercial during MNF. I went to Google to see if I saw it too share here. Apparently SNL made fun of it some months back:

[phxgators]

Forgot about this thread… had mine a couple of weeks ago. My procedure was at 8, check in at 7. I had to take the last round of prep at 1 so it wasn’t too bad, just stayed up watching tv and playing video games.

My prep was to take 12 pills in a 20 minute span twice. You don’t realize how many pills that is until you think you’re about done, look in the bottle, and realize you’re only halfway through.

[Nonlinear FC]

My prep was drinking 64 ounces of liquid with powder, along with some regimen of pills (3 or 4). I choose lime Gatorade and I can still drink lime Gatorade after the fact, so... It was like a really lame drinking game, having to throw down 12 ounces at a time every 20-30 minutes.

But, boy, it was "effective."

[GoodKarma]

My prep was drinking 64 ounces of liquid with powder, along with some regimen of pills (3 or 4). I choose lime Gatorade and I can still drink lime Gatorade after the fact, so... It was like a really lame drinking game, having to throw down 12 ounces at a time every 20-30 minutes.

But, boy, it was "effective."

Mine is basically the same...mix a bottle of Miralax with two bottles of Gatorade...drank one last night at six; drinking the other one four hours before my procedure...8 ounces at a time in 15 minute increments.

I got hit with a massive stomachache last night around 10 which sucks because you can't take anything for it.

[Shirley]

That SNL bit is amazing.

I think I just booked my first fun turn on this ride. I was supposed to do it last year, but gave up after a few rounds of phone tag. Not quite as many meetings this year and the gastro place has a better portal now, so I finally got it scheduled. Can't wait.

[P.D.X.]

and the gastro place has a better portal now,

May that be reflected in your results.

[Giff]

Unleash.

[Shirley]

I just got the confirmation of my appointment and NOW they tell me that I am I also committing my wife to at least a half day in the Dr.'s office. Luckily I think I picked a day that she's not teaching a class.

I got a morning appointment (9:45). I assume I should go ahead and take a full PTO day, right?

[A_B]

I just got the confirmation of my appointment and NOW they tell me that I am I also committing my wife to at least a half day in the Dr.'s office. Luckily I think I picked a day that she's not teaching a class.

I got a morning appointment (9:45). I assume I should go ahead and take a full PTO day, right?

Yes. YMMV, but I typically take a 3+ hour nap afterwards. Then just putter around and hit the sack early too. Maybe I'm a weak man.

[Nonlinear FC]

Yeah, take the day. I had an early appt and I was pretty groggy the rest of the day... At least up until the evening.

I would also look into whether they have a set-up where they have your wife's cell and can call and let her know you are 20-30 minutes from waking up. At a minimum, there's a known amount of time where she absolutely doesn't need to sit there because they put you under and you take a "nap" that lasts about 90-120 minutes long.

If doc needs to take out some polyps or whatever, the amount of time might go up and you're under longer, which obviously extends the time she doesn't need to sit in the office.

My doc's operation/set-up was very patient friendly. My wife works remotely, so knowing she could either drop me off and go home/Starbucks for a couple hours was super helpful.

[A_B]

I've always been told up front to have a driver (who has to stay), but I have never scheduled one through an online portal.

[rass]

My wife didn't have to stay, but general COVID rules were still in effect so they didn't want extra people in the waiting room. And we were far enough away from home that she just went to a nearby bookstore or something.

[Nonlinear FC]

It just doesn't really make sense to say they have to stay. Like, what, you don't trust that the spouse is going to come back?

Absolutely, you need to have a driver, and it can't be ride share app, has to be an actual person with contact info. But mandating they sit in an office for 2-3.5 hours is pretty much having rules to have rules.

[A_B]

I think it’s an emergency precaution. And yes now they have the driver wait outside if possible at my place. I've had an alarming number of these things for a 46 year old. Both ends!

[rass]

I was allowed to drive home post-op after my SACK TRICK.

[Nonlinear FC]

I was one of the unfortunate ones where the sack trick a) hurt during the procedure(!) and b) no way in Hell I could drive after that.

[Giff]

I was one of the unfortunate ones where the sack trick a) hurt during the procedure(!) and b) no way in Hell I could drive after that.

I still haven't had mine thanks to a buddy who had a horrendous experience. He didn't feel it during, but the doctor told him he would definitely feel it after based off the issues he was having.

[sancarlos]

I think it’s an emergency precaution. And yes now they have the driver wait outside if possible at my place. I've had an alarming number of these things for a 46 year old. Both ends!

I’ve had two, and my wife has had two. And all they required was that the driver be within a short drive away - not onsite.

[govmentchedda]

I was one of the unfortunate ones where the sack trick a) hurt during the procedure(!) and b) no way in Hell I could drive after that.

I still haven't had mine thanks to a buddy who had a horrendous experience. He didn't feel it during, but the doctor told him he would definitely feel it after based off the issues he was having.

If you need a story of a seamless sack trick, that was my experience. I felt bad for lazing about as long as I did after. Both the procedure and the recovery were a piece of cake.

[GoodKarma]

My wife had her first one last year...I was able to just drop her off and pick her up. She, on the other hand, is apparently going to stick around...

[Shirley]

Nope, they're saying I have to have a driver - no rideshare - and the driver has to remain at the center the entire time. It's on a Wednesday, and my wife doesn't have any classes on Wed this semester. Might be different in January though...

[Ryan]

General anesthesia not ‘medically necessary’ for a colonoscopy, says one of state’s biggest insurers

Typical colonoscopy patients insured by Blue Cross Blue Shield of Massachusetts will have to pay out of pocket for full sedation.

[mister d]

Like in the same way epidurals aren't "medically necessary" when giving birth?

[Gunpowder]

It's also not financially necessary to not pay it with a box full of pennies

[sancarlos]

I’ve had two colonoscopies and six eye surgeries with the “twilight” partial sedation. It has worked fine. I’m not prone to agreeing with insurers, but I see where they are coming from, here.

I have shoulder surgery on Friday. Full sedation for that one.

[tennbengal]

General anesthesia not ‘medically necessary’ for a colonoscopy, says one of state’s biggest insurers

Typical colonoscopy patients insured by Blue Cross Blue Shield of Massachusetts will have to pay out of pocket for full sedation.

for fuckssake

[P.D.X.]

and barrels soon to replace procedure beds

[The Sybian]

A shot of whiskey and a leather strap to bite down on worked in the past.

[A_B]

A shot of whiskey and a leather strap to bite down on worked in the past.

Those civil war battlefield colonoscopies were no joke.

[Giff]

A shot of whiskey and a leather strap to bite down on worked in the past.

Those civil war battlefield colonoscopies were no joke.

Especially the prep!

[+] spoiler

[The Sybian]

A shot of whiskey and a leather strap to bite down on worked in the past.

Those civil war battlefield colonoscopies were no joke.

Especially the prep!

[+] spoiler

I don't even want the context behind those pics, I feel guilty enough laughing without knowing their stories.