More Backroom Deals Than Tammany Hall - A Youth Soccer Tale

[HaulCitgo]

Not letting kid go to AL for tourney. Kid begging and been hitting the books like I asked but they signed up for two straight out of town tournaments during middle of school year cause coach took youngers to England to play in August so missed all preseason. Anyway they make you use the tourney travel agent and $305/night for some sort of generic suites. I much prefer to travel Fridays and relax but that's a $800+ soccer weekend. Twice. To play a worse group of teams than the rush 1s that's coming to play his old league team at the field the kid can walk to from the house. So thankfully they've started inviting his team to those practices and the local league let's them play down so he'll be walking but he didn't have his pass Saturday and played bad Sunday so spots. Coach wants to pressure and kick and run but that's not my kid so 1/2 playing time and been missing... but like rhianna still got my money

[The Sybian]

Tourneys paid quickly but the regular seasons...end of season payout up here.

Not sure how school games work, but club and travel, refs get an envelope of cash from the home coach before every game.

Reminded me of a story when I was 12. I was reffing a town Rec league game. 2-man, each ref got $5. The league gave each coach a stack of $5 bills. The coach of this game was the Town's elected Comptroller. He handed me a check for $5. My father was furious that he had to go to the bank to cash a $5 check for me, and even more pissed that this guy was in charge of overseeing accounting for the Town, and incapable of managing $5 to pay the ref in a rec league.

[HaulCitgo]

Kid showed up last weekend. Didn't start the first two then missed a game then dad made him miss a tournament (btw how do these kids pass school) so a real good way to get on outs with coach. Guy just keeps on bringing in new kids with no roster spots. Dude it's October... but all can play. Beginnings of pt and starting xi grumblings on the sidelines and hotel but 18 on game days hasn't been an issue yet.

He doesn't jump off the page but has a unique skill set for the team. Played absolutely great and got a hug and whisper in ear (veo has audio and that's unfortunate when it's on the parent side... coaches know this) when he came off game one then coach kept him on and he kept them organized and in possession for the rest of the tournament. He gets a pass someone gets time he gets a pass someone else gets a shot he gets a pass they get out. Rinse repeat all weekend. Other teams just ran around all day. No fun that. Punished a bunch of teams that couldnt keep up individually but they also tied a game like that when he sat out and kids tried to beat increasing numbers as they got more desperate for goals.

Week long fall break still a week on but no games. Trained in the rain in the hood last night but trainer/agent/scout gave them really nice fc Dallas and adidas tops to change into. Guess no one likes the collars anymore but new school clothes! Dropped him at field this am to pick up vacant ref gigs all day. Guess it's soccer season (when isn't it).

[wlu_lax6]

Kid of a lady who works for me has a tryout/training stint at Man City in February (includes tickets to see the Everton game). Sounds like this is a step before they try to get the family to move to New York.

My local club has asked this kid to guest at a tournament. Parents want to give him an experience playing with kids he does not know and a more physical style. There existing club's leadership is discussing. Guess the club recruiting thing is a real issue around here.

[HaulCitgo]

Proud of the kid. Not for the soccer but because he made a highlight video. Apparently he's known how to do this for a while but I'm impressed. Something of an aversion to the other thread and soccer cause success is fleeting but the video is forever. Blinking circles apparently the next evolution

https://youtu.be/5w-PVmsonOA?si=i75IKmRQ0kZ8Hau2

[HaulCitgo]

Weekend was the last game of the calendar year and early Jan the only scheduled league travel weekend. Played the same team again but this time big balled em to death. Other team still better but every cross every corner every kick was a free header. Kid sat cause skipped practice to pass finals but came on with team on back foot and immediately made key pass to get shot blocked by great defensive play. Screened keeper on ensuing corner for first of four header goals into open goal vacated by keeper trying to get around. True proud parent stuff there. Barnburner but neither qualified for the main playoff. So he will see them again in mid January but tournament is weekend before school tryout week. Not ideal but no convincing most likely.

Game shape off cause it's late and school and practice cancelled and holidays and coaches away. Picked up some lingering aches and could use a break but second to summer which really should be break winter is main offseason get better opportunity except there is no winter.

School got reassigned next year to a bigger school division and much tougher north suburban region. Dreams of playoffs and championships decomposing at bottom of lake. At least til next reassignment his junior senior year. Coaches said conditioning and maturity is key in parent meeting but that it's player responsibility. Girl been training for 3 weeks with track team. Football goes spring practice summer conditioning fall through championships this week at Mercedes Benz. But soccer coaches say it's on the kid. Girl is unequivocal... They ain't got funding. Girls in a much better sport on that one.

[A_B]

Proud of the kid. Not for the soccer but because he made a highlight video. Apparently he's known how to do this for a while but I'm impressed. Something of an aversion to the other thread and soccer cause success is fleeting but the video is forever. Blinking circles apparently the next evolution

https://youtu.be/5w-PVmsonOA?si=i75IKmRQ0kZ8Hau2

I just saw this, but it's pretty cool that he seems to be a pass first player. That's kinda rare. I went to a couple of JV high school games and most kids, when they got the bll, tried to do too much themselves. Only a couple looked to move it into good positions.

[rass]

Weekend was the last game of the calendar year and early Jan the only scheduled league travel weekend. Played the same team again but this time big balled em to death. Other team still better but every cross every corner every kick was a free header. Kid sat cause skipped practice to pass finals but came on with team on back foot and immediately made key pass to get shot blocked by great defensive play. Screened keeper on ensuing corner for first of four header goals into open goal vacated by keeper trying to get around. True proud parent stuff there. Barnburner but neither qualified for the main playoff. So he will see them again in mid January but tournament is weekend before school tryout week. Not ideal but no convincing most likely.

Game shape off cause it's late and school and practice cancelled and holidays and coaches away. Picked up some lingering aches and could use a break but second to summer which really should be break winter is main offseason get better opportunity except there is no winter.

School got reassigned next year to a bigger school division and much tougher north suburban region. Dreams of playoffs and championships decomposing at bottom of lake. At least til next reassignment his junior senior year. Coaches said conditioning and maturity is key in parent meeting but that it's player responsibility. Girl been training for 3 weeks with track team. Football goes spring practice summer conditioning fall through championships this week at Mercedes Benz. But soccer coaches say it's on the kid. Girl is unequivocal... They ain't got funding. Girls in a much better sport on that one.

I just want to say I enjoy your writing style on these longer-form posts which is good because I sometimes have to re-read them.

[wlu_lax6]

https://nypost.com/2023/12/27/news/texa ... ign=nypost

[The Sybian]

https://nypost.com/2023/12/27/news/texa ... ign=nypost

It's a blurry photo, but he looks a bit like Johnnie!

[HaulCitgo]

Club season ended with an L but no injuries. Losers bracket of the league playoff the long weekend before school tryouts so expected little. Might as well have been CL knockouts. Teammates, coaches and parents all yelled at him to be more selfish. They yelled at LeBron for the same. Besides he loves Barca. Coach left at half to coach the younger in the real playoff so the old British guy just kept yelling turn even with a man on his back. Zero fucks about giving it away. Up and down. But he beat most and wouldn’t have tried if not for the (bad) but helpful instruction. Even led to the tying goal. Of course they gave it back immediately doing the same stuff. A guy got punched with about 10 minutes left and my kid didn't jump for a header and cartwheeled someone. Guy took out the next kid he saw and started another one. One goal loss but impressive competition in a meaningless game the day before most tryouts. A good group if less talented than the last. Core has been together for 4 years and that helps since the other teams in the league have lots of movement.

Kid gets to be in a varsity scrimmage tonight but on JV. 66 degrees so perfect weather but tryouts were really really cold. 90+ signed up but he says 80 showed. Not everyone has gear to play in 25 and wind. Passed the conditioning test (upside to risking your health in a tournament) and got moved to the varsity field second day. Said he played well but speed still a detriment. Teams mix more than club so hes been able to practice with and against older kids on varsity. Learning opportunity for sure. They lack quality seniors and quantity sophs. Apparently soccer coaches also but the JV guy is a journalism teacher and it shows in communications. Varsity has two paid soccer types who seem be youth pastor church sports and younger Hispanic grad. They’ve been there a while and the organization shows. We will see about the soccer. Juniors are multiple top guys and five juniors on JV. Dropped some upperclassmen and kept a handful of the middle school team. Only one new kid but a few kids that play mls so maybe more as years go on.

Not sure he’ll get to play tonight but hopefully open substitutions. JV kickoff Monday. Leave class early (one of the best feelings in the world… but arrrrgh) for mandatory bus and then girls game and then play at 7:30 only to get home at what time? Kid is distracted easily so bus work not real likely. Little bitter about the girls practicing first and the boys late. Same with weekday games.

[HaulCitgo]

Unbeaten nine games in. Pics and stadiums and teams all A+ Schedule not quitting highest comp in area. Circles are smaller. Opposing teams are teammates and teammates are friends. Love of the game is high. Team wearing down a tiny bit with second three game week. Varsity already in playoffs. Kid feeling good pickup on off day. Season over in two weeks then more soccer.

[A_B]

Citgo is the William Faulkner of youth soccer dads.

[rass]

Citgo is the William Faulkner of youth soccer dads.

That works. At least in terms of me enjoying the text even if I need to reread it a couple of times to understand it.

[The Sybian]

Ugly scenes this weekend. My daughter's game ended a couple minutes early with what looked like a certain ACL tear for a girl on the other team. Non-contact injury, girl was down screaming for 5 minutes. Eventually loaded into the back of a Gator and driven off the field to the parking lot. Just saw the video, and I'm really hoping it's a hyper-extension, but it doesn't look good. Also had a concussion on my daughter's team. At halftime, my daughter and this girl went to the medical tent (daughter got tripped at the edge of the field, left a lot of skin on the rocks behind the end line and they couldn't get the bleeding to stop). Teammate looks at her and said, "how did we get here?" Medic asked her a bunch of questions, girl had no memory of anything from that morning. Not happy that she stayed on the field for at least 15 minutes with a concussion. Ref checked her out, as she was wobblily and awkward trying to stand up. I don't think the coach ever looked at her. In fairness, live if didn't look like much, two girls collided. In replay, looks like she smacked the back of her head on the turf when she fell backwards.

[HaulCitgo]

9-1-4 JV season over. Limped to the finish but competition was tough and they were better.

New shirt starting tonight! Varsity is 11-1-1 so he gets to ride for the last 4 games and playoffs. Been told he wont play but he can dress. Barring disaster hell get to practice for 3-4 more weeks.

[Nonlinear FC]

I remember getting moved up from JV to V as a freshman in baseball. Got to play RF in a blowout playoff loss, but hit one of only 4 dingers in my entire "career" to avoid the mercy in the 5th. Weird feeling.

I also got moved up to V in soccer my sophomore year as a field player, which I still count as one of my prouder moments. I was hiding from everyone that I was a goalie when I moved from MI-->MD because I was sick of the position. I stupidly told someone that and the coach flipped out and made me play in the net bc the incumbent was a pant load.

/weird humblebrags

[HaulCitgo]

[rass]

Hells yeah

[Giff]

Anyone else limping today after kicking a chair at soccer yesterday? Just me?

[rass]

Anyone else limping today after kicking a chair at soccer yesterday? Just me?

Crap I wanted to ask you what you walked back on FB and didn’t think to do it here. So…?

[Giff]

Dunno. She played 5 minutes of a 50-minute game. And it’s not a skill thing or anything like that. Zero idea why it happened other than him just completely spacing that he had a girl named Asher on the team. She’s not the best but there’s literally a girl who just moves in circles at her spot who played half the game. I wish I had better control over my emotions to ask him after the game, but I was only capable of passive-aggressive comments. I should have just kept going to the truck when I packed up my chair with about 5 minutes left in the game and started walking way. Got halfway there and turned around.

We had a couple parents reach out after the game asking if she was OK health wise because they noticed it too. Which thinking about that now makes me mad because I walked over to their bench to ask her if she felt OK halfway through second half after she played less than two minutes before being subbed out. She did and neither coach bothered to put her in again after that.

[HaulCitgo]

Welcome. Your feelings are perfectly normal and accepted here. My name is citgo.

[Giff]

Welcome. Your feelings are perfectly normal and accepted here. My name is citgo.

Trust me Asher will be nowhere near the level of y’all’s kids even if I think she could be awesome on defense if she learned how to use her body. But 10% of a u-9 game is ridiculous and also against the rules which has been pointed out to me.

[The Sybian]

Welcome. Your feelings are perfectly normal and accepted here. My name is citgo.

Trust me Asher will be nowhere near the level of y’all’s kids even if I think she could be awesome on defense if she learned how to use her body. But 10% of a u-9 game is ridiculous and also against the rules which has been pointed out to me.

You’ve got every right to question the coach. In our town travel program, every player had to play at least 50% of the game through U-11 or U-12. For rec, everyone got equal time. I’d send the coach a polite email. Maybe he made an honest mistake. I’ve seen it happen. I’ve also had situations where a kid said they were hurt or one who just didn’t want to play. One parent would always call to yell at us (it was never her kid shorted, but she’d still bitch). She had an app and monitored us for some reason.

Even at the highest club level, U-9 shouldn’t be focused on winning, the focus should be on developing, learning the game and having fun. No excuse for sitting a kid that long unless she was hurt or asked to sit.

[Giff]

Fuckin' urgent care visit later this morning it looks like. Kelli is going to e-mail the coach. She's fired up too and if she wants to take the lead, she'll probably keep her emotions in check better than I would. If this was intentional, we are out.

[elflaco2]

Welcome. Your feelings are perfectly normal and accepted here. My name is citgo.

Trust me Asher will be nowhere near the level of y’all’s kids even if I think she could be awesome on defense if she learned how to use her body. But 10% of a u-9 game is ridiculous and also against the rules which has been pointed out to me.

You’ve got every right to question the coach. In our town travel program, every player had to play at least 50% of the game through U-11 or U-12. For rec, everyone got equal time. I’d send the coach a polite email. Maybe he made an honest mistake. I’ve seen it happen. I’ve also had situations where a kid said they were hurt or one who just didn’t want to play. One parent would always call to yell at us (it was never her kid shorted, but she’d still bitch). She had an app and monitored us for some reason.

Even at the highest club level, U-9 shouldn’t be focused on winning, the focus should be on developing, learning the game and having fun. No excuse for sitting a kid that long unless she was hurt or asked to sit.

that's BS..
although some leagues have gone away from required minutes.. town travel or rec teams should have requirements

when i last ran a club (21) we had a minimum # of minutes for kid - but it was across the season (not game) recognizing that as syb points out.. stuff happens..

u8-12- it was at least 50%
u13 and older - 1/3 of the game..

[wlu_lax6]

At our club, our younger ages and rec programs have clear rules that everyone plays and you can't hold nearly anything against putting a kid on the field. That one killed me a bit as a coach. I want to reward kids who come to practice (or at minimum come/tell me they will miss) and kids who are putting out the effort. But skill, score, etc are not reasons to be left off. Shoot even the kid who loves to play goalie could only be in there for at most 1/2 the game even if nobody else wanted to play.

Does youth hoops still have rules where a kid has to play a whole quarter without being subbed? Even if the kid played 1/2 the game, they don't get credit if they don't play at least the quarter start-to-finish. That would have killed my coaching style in soccer. I treated my teams like hockey with full line shifts because of the roster size and at the rec level more than 8 minutes of kids on the sideline was dangerous for their focus.

But our club also had the rule that parents could not talk to coaches for 24 hours after a game about this type of stuff.

[Giff]

Our league has rules like that too which I was not aware of until this past weekend because this has never happened in the eight seasons we've played between our two daughters.

When I played youth basketball it was 1 quarter play, 1 sit with no subs in first half. Third quarter was half and half with no subs, then the 4th was a free for all. We won or came in second every year I played in part because our coach was smarter than the others. Most would put their 5 best players out there for first quarter, then the next best 5 for second quarter. We'd keep one guy for the second quarter who would dominate.

[Giff]

Issue resolved. Kelli sent a nice email asking if there was a reason behind it. He was extremely apologetic saying it was just an oversight and that he loves Asher and having her on the team. I wish I would have just been mature enough to keep my emotions in check to say something right after the game.

[A_B]

Issue resolved. Kelli sent a nice email asking if there was a reason behind it. He was extremely apologetic saying it was just an oversight and that he loves Asher and having her on the team. I wish I would have just been mature enough to keep my emotions in check to say something right after the game.

Remember that the next time you can't read the menu.

[Giff]

Issue resolved. Kelli sent a nice email asking if there was a reason behind it. He was extremely apologetic saying it was just an oversight and that he loves Asher and having her on the team. I wish I would have just been mature enough to keep my emotions in check to say something right after the game.

Remember that the next time you can't read the menu.

Well it all depends on just how condescending my wife it tbh.

[The Sybian]

Issue resolved. Kelli sent a nice email asking if there was a reason behind it. He was extremely apologetic saying it was just an oversight and that he loves Asher and having her on the team. I wish I would have just been mature enough to keep my emotions in check to say something right after the game.

Glad to hear it. I always mapped out a lineup card before every game to make sure I didn't make this kind of mistake. Actually, my super type-A co-coach charted it out every game with exact times for subs and total time for every player listed at the bottom, and I would always tell him to do it game day, because inevitably someone wouldn't show, or a kid slated to start would show up late.

A friend of ours was the assistant coach for his daughter's travel team and had to run it by himself one weekend. He asked for some advice, we told him to write out the lineups. He laughed at us, said it isn't that hard, he could wing it. We had the game after his, and watched him completely lost, trying to figure out subs, telling a girl to go in and hearing her say she just came off, and spin out into a panic. We had to jump in coach for him while he sorted it out. Then the next day he got a call from the league President. He had two games and every player except for 1 started in at least one game. Mother was absolutely crazy. He insisted, against our advice, on calling the mother to apologize and explain it was an oversite. Called back saying he should have listened, she screamed at him for over an hour, accusing him of prejudice against the daughter.

All of that to say that while it looks easy, I can totally believe the coach made an honest mistake. I'd give him the benefit of the doubt, and I'd hope he gives her extra minutes next game and an apology.

[Giff]

I'm totally giving him the benefit of the doubt. He was extremely apologetic and sometimes you can tell by the tone it is sincere.

[Nonlinear FC]

Yeah, I was in charge of the clock and making sure my co-coach got everyone equal time. I have attention issues, so it was something I really had to stay focused on... It can get away from you REAL quick (per Syb's post.)

We never had parents that would scream at us. I guess that comes from it being a travel team, so you're really asking for trouble (as a parent) if you go down that road. We had one parent try and pull that shit and we basically said "if you're not happy, please find another place for your daughter to play" and that was the end of that.

I mean, Carli Lloyd wasn't walking through the door... We had some really good players, but we never had someone so good that we were going to put up with nonsense. We also built a culture where the players (and their parents) knew we had them on the team for a reason, and that we had individual goals and a plan for each player. And we communicated... Maybe too much... But everyone knew what was what.

[sancarlos]

Issue resolved. Kelli sent a nice email asking if there was a reason behind it. He was extremely apologetic saying it was just an oversight and that he loves Asher and having her on the team. I wish I would have just been mature enough to keep my emotions in check to say something right after the game.

Remember that the next time you can't read the menu.

Literal laugh-out-loud.

Giff, I’m glad the coach responded appropriately. Maybe Asher gets a LOT of playing time next game.

[Giff]

Anyone else limping today after kicking a chair at soccer yesterday? Just me?

Well, it's not broken, so I'll take this $208 lesson to heart.

[Giff]

Giff, I’m glad the coach responded appropriately. Maybe Asher gets a LOT of playing time next game.

Nah, I don't want it to happen with any of the other girls. I also hope he doesn't make a big deal about it to her on Friday.

[Shirley]

When I coached my boys in rec soccer, I mapped out the lineups and sub patterns ahead of time, because it's too hard during the games. I'd have my assistant use the sheet and run a timer. Of course, that was often difficult too, because invariably a kid or two wouldn't show or would show up late.

I also deployed a strategy of starting the kids who got to the game first. I figured that way the kids might convince their parents that it IS important to show up before the actual kickoff. But that strategy also made pre-made lineups and sub patterns impossible.

[A_B]

When I coached my boys in rec soccer, I mapped out the lineups and sub patterns ahead of time, because it's too hard during the games. I'd have my assistant use the sheet and run a timer. Of course, that was often difficult too, because invariably a kid or two wouldn't show or would show up late.

I also deployed a strategy of starting the kids who got to the game first. I figured that way the kids might convince their parents that it IS important to show up before the actual kickoff. But that strategy also made pre-made lineups and sub patterns impossible.

I did the second part by just having the spreadsheet printed and which time they would be on the field or off, but no names went on the list until they started arriving. So it was just a blank template I could slot any name into and make it as fair as possible. The one thing that fucked it up was when a kid showed up AFTER the game had started, but no system is perfect.