Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Moderators: Shirley, Sabo, brian, rass, DaveInSeattle
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Ha! Yeah, Jerry’s never seen Always Sunny? Maybe he’s heard of a guy named Larry David who did a show that gave no fucks? That guy is lucky he didn’t get caught in a shitstorm when he was 38, dating a 17 year-old high school girl.
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
bUt ThEy ArE gRaNdFaThErEd In
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Remembering the time HIMYM made an anal sex joke to explain why one of its characters wasn't around when the actress went on maternity leave. Probably grandfathered in too.
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness. - God
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Kinda sorta? If you don’t already know the joke, you couldn’t have any idea it’s about anal sex.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
I didn’t know the joke until 15 seconds later when I googled it.
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Perfect.
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
- The Sybian
- The Dude
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Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
What was it?
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
-Pruitt
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
What's the difference between peanut butter and jam?
I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass.
I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass.
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Jerry Seinfeld is a guest on Neal Brennan's podcast this week.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
I always heard it as "what's the difference between jelly and jam?" I think of that joke during most of my grocery store visits.
Totally Kafkaesque
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
What about a joke involving chickpeas and garbanzo beans!? Can we even talk about that anymore!?
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Not on network tv that apparently millions upon millions are relying on for their comedy these days.
well this is gonna be someone's new signature - bronto
- The Sybian
- The Dude
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Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Thanks, I kind of remember that now.
An honest to God cult of personality - formed around a failed steak salesman.
-Pruitt
-Pruitt
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
That had to have been a few years after "stick it in her brownie" in Arrested Development, right?
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
So far, so good on this Tom Brady roast.
But Kim Kardashian just got up on stage.
Edit
Bill Belichick is actually killing it right now.
But Kim Kardashian just got up on stage.
Edit
Bill Belichick is actually killing it right now.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Turned it on long enough to see that Tony dude (no idea who) absolutely murder everyone. So I turned it off because it’s gotta be hard to top that.
I felt aswirl with warm secretions.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Zero jokes about him kissing his kid. Disappointing.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
I'm about halfway through and Edelman and others making Aaron Hernandez jokes seems really fucked up. Anything to help your post playing days celebrity career I guess.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Did anyone bring up that his supermodel, higher earning wife divorced him and took his kids because he wanted to play on a 8-9 also-ran instead of being with her and their kids? Because if not, that wasn't a roast.
My avatar corresponds on my place in the Swamp posting list with the all-time Home Run list. Number 45 is Paul Konerko with 439.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
I think this shows why Comedy Central was smart to edit these and not run them live. Not bad but just LONG and sending Hart and Ross to the crowd to allow for changes created some less than funny. Also editing down would have helped Kevin Hart hosting (and protected Kraft from a public massage joke that Brady had to step in on).
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Why does Kraft have to be protected from a public massage joke?
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
I think Kevin Hart did in his opening monologue.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
- A_B
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Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Can't be hurting his feelings, now, sc.
You know what you need? A lyrical sucker punch to the face.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Don't know but Brady thought so. He got up from his seat, interrupted Jeff Ross mid set.
https://www.si.com/nfl/2024/05/06/tom-b ... w-reaction
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
"What a bunch of pedantic pricks." - sybian
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
See, I thought that was a joke. Considering Edelman opened his set with a Kraft funeral joke, I figured everything was fine.
Now Affleck's set was a total abomination and he should be dragged for it.
Now Affleck's set was a total abomination and he should be dragged for it.
mister d wrote:Couldn't have pegged me better.
EnochRoot wrote:I mean, whatever. Johnnie's all hot cuz I ride him.
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Tom Brady now says he regrets roast because of his kids. Dolt.
If you want a nice recovery from the Brady comedy abortion, watch Kevin Hart's Twain award. Genuinely funny people with lots of feel good moments. Who would of thunk that Chris Rock is funnier on stage than Gronk? And Eddie Murphy...
If you want a nice recovery from the Brady comedy abortion, watch Kevin Hart's Twain award. Genuinely funny people with lots of feel good moments. Who would of thunk that Chris Rock is funnier on stage than Gronk? And Eddie Murphy...
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Sure the Kennedy Center patrons and VIPs were excited about the profanity. Guess the reason it was on Netflix and not PBS like most of the Twain ceremonies past. Had some good moments.EdRomero wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 7:31 am Tom Brady now says he regrets roast because of his kids. Dolt.
If you want a nice recovery from the Brady comedy abortion, watch Kevin Hart's Twain award. Genuinely funny people with lots of feel good moments. Who would of thunk that Chris Rock is funnier on stage than Gronk? And Eddie Murphy...
- DSafetyGuy
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Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
It could very likely be budgetary issues.wlu_lax6 wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 8:28 amSure the Kennedy Center patrons and VIPs were excited about the profanity. Guess the reason it was on Netflix and not PBS like most of the Twain ceremonies past. Had some good moments.EdRomero wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 7:31 am Tom Brady now says he regrets roast because of his kids. Dolt.
If you want a nice recovery from the Brady comedy abortion, watch Kevin Hart's Twain award. Genuinely funny people with lots of feel good moments. Who would of thunk that Chris Rock is funnier on stage than Gronk? And Eddie Murphy...
“All I'm sayin' is, he comes near me, I'll put him in the wall.”
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
you mean like a Kevin Hart production company dealDSafetyGuy wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 9:05 amIt could very likely be budgetary issues.wlu_lax6 wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 8:28 amSure the Kennedy Center patrons and VIPs were excited about the profanity. Guess the reason it was on Netflix and not PBS like most of the Twain ceremonies past. Had some good moments.EdRomero wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 7:31 am Tom Brady now says he regrets roast because of his kids. Dolt.
If you want a nice recovery from the Brady comedy abortion, watch Kevin Hart's Twain award. Genuinely funny people with lots of feel good moments. Who would of thunk that Chris Rock is funnier on stage than Gronk? And Eddie Murphy...
- DSafetyGuy
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- Location: Behind the high school
Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Yes, but having the federally-funded Kennedy Center as the location is also part.wlu_lax6 wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 10:01 amyou mean like a Kevin Hart production company dealDSafetyGuy wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 9:05 amIt could very likely be budgetary issues.wlu_lax6 wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 8:28 amSure the Kennedy Center patrons and VIPs were excited about the profanity. Guess the reason it was on Netflix and not PBS like most of the Twain ceremonies past. Had some good moments.EdRomero wrote: ↑Thu May 16, 2024 7:31 am Tom Brady now says he regrets roast because of his kids. Dolt.
If you want a nice recovery from the Brady comedy abortion, watch Kevin Hart's Twain award. Genuinely funny people with lots of feel good moments. Who would of thunk that Chris Rock is funnier on stage than Gronk? And Eddie Murphy...
“All I'm sayin' is, he comes near me, I'll put him in the wall.”
- DaveInSeattle
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Re: Comedy...stand-up and otherwise...
Great story about stand-up Zak Toscani, who's been doing house shows...for $800-$1200 he'll come to your house and do stand-up for you and your friends.
The Concierge Comedian
The Concierge Comedian
A little taste of his comedy...In August 2022, Zak Toscani was in the middle of performing a stand-up show in a fan’s Boulder, Colorado, backyard when, suddenly, an audience member’s hyperactive dog began running laps around the house like it had been possessed. At first, it was just a minor distraction, but then Toscani and the audience of 30 to 40 people heard a squeak from the opposite side of the house. The next time the dog reappeared, it presented everyone with the graphic remains of the rabbit it had been chasing. Toscani learned a valuable lesson that day about these DIY shows: At any time, he might get upstaged by a rabbit carcass. Reflecting back on that show now, he remembers thinking, How do I follow death?