Random Thoughts About Thoughts Random

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 3:02 pm

Jerloma wrote:We should really ask a mantis shrimp.

Ask and ye shall receive. From The Oatmeal's Facebook page:

(The posts in the thread are outstanding. Or the absolute opposite. Whichever your perception.)

howard · Post by **howard** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 3:04 pm

Ryan wrote: If responding to "it's blue and black" with "shut up cunt" is wrong then I'm done with this country!

Everyone has a different last straw.

tennbengal · Post by **tennbengal** » Fri Feb 27, 2015 3:06 pm

rass wrote:And literally everyone at work is talking about the GD dress right now.

It came up at the deposition I was defending today. Off the record, not on, at least.

Brontoburglar · Post by **Brontoburglar** » Sat Feb 28, 2015 6:00 pm

Johnnie wrote:The reality is the camera sucks and the lighting is horrible. Taking Ryan's pic:

You know what's black? The opaque bars on the top and bottom of the picture. Otherwise is a rusty bronze color from the filter.

And the blue is the hue you get from white. You know those "ultra white" headlights on some cars? They have a blue hue. By they are "ultra white."

That original pic is white and gold.

Because this is the side-by-side from the link I posted. If you see the same thing in both pics, then I don't know what to tell you.

Scrolled down and saw the big picture on the right as gold and white for the first time. And then scrolled up and it changed to black and blue.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Sun Mar 01, 2015 3:33 pm

Has anyone else noticed how often the music that plays when you're on hold sounds like it's coming from an ancient, water-damaged speaker? Is this a ploy to mind-trick people into preemptively hanging up?

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Sun Mar 01, 2015 8:15 pm

tennbengal wrote:
rass wrote:And literally everyone at work is talking about the GD dress right now.
It came up at the deposition I was defending today. Off the record, not on, at least.

Defending a deposition is so great. Lots of billable hours for so little work.

howard · Post by **howard** » Sun Mar 01, 2015 8:35 pm

Just say 'objection' and 'don't answer that' a lot, right?

tennbengal · Post by **tennbengal** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 10:30 am

govmentchedda wrote:
tennbengal wrote:
rass wrote:And literally everyone at work is talking about the GD dress right now.
It came up at the deposition I was defending today. Off the record, not on, at least.
Defending a deposition is so great. Lots of billable hours for so little work.

I am now on the Plaintiff's side, but, yes, that used to be awesome when I was billing hourly.

tennbengal · Post by **tennbengal** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 10:31 am

howard wrote:Just say 'objection' and 'don't answer that' a lot, right?

Not really and nope, hardly ever.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 4:10 pm

I've decided that instead of combing my hair straight forward, I'd comb it to the side. Dude haircuts in the military are limited, so everyone notices when you switch it up. (Everyone seemed to like the change too.)

Funny sidenote though. A couple of my German friends took notice and each said the same thing. "Ah, that's nice. You're combing your hair to the side. Hitler used to do that."

I laughed a lot. It's almost complimentary.

howard · Post by **howard** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 4:17 pm

He was quite popular. Something like 38% of the vote at his peak.

Rush2112 · Post by **Rush2112** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 4:31 pm

How's the 'stache coming in John?

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Mon Mar 02, 2015 5:48 pm

That doubles as a Moustache March question. You're slick.

I don't grow hair on my philtrum. Any moustache I attempt to grow will immediately have follow up questions like "Where's your van with 'Free Candy' written on the side?" and "Are you allowed within 1,000 feet of a school zone?"

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Wed Mar 04, 2015 4:59 pm

I have a client with the last name of Lockett. Everytime I work on this case, this song pops into my head.

DSafetyGuy · Post by **DSafetyGuy** » Thu Mar 05, 2015 3:41 pm

Can't find the fonts thread, so here you go.

Look out Denver, here comes Type Con 2015.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Mar 05, 2015 5:13 pm

Someone should set up a Comic Sans booth just for the reactions.

Ryan · Post by **Ryan** » Tue Mar 10, 2015 2:03 pm

If everyone lived as long as the oldest person in recorded history, the following people would still be around (but dead within the year):

Charles Atlas
Francisco Franco ("...is still alive")
Omar Bradley
Frances Ouimet
Mae West
Mao Zedong
Alfred Rosenberg and Hermann Goring (born on the same day)

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Tue Mar 10, 2015 2:15 pm

The Sybian wrote:
sancarlos wrote:We're not selling, but the market in our little burg, and really most all the Peninsula/San Francisco, remains white hot. Houses routinely take three short steps - a realtor open house, followed by a general open house, followed by bids being taken - all within a week. And usually there are multiple bids, all above asking price. At least once a month, I receive a cold call from a realtor who says they represent a buyer and wanted to see if they could talk us into selling our home.
And the houses in your area twice as much as they are in mine. Giff posted his house info on Facebook and I threw up in my mouth when i saw the price. Holy fuck. The sad thing is, or at least was, that federal government employees in Houston had a higher cost of living bump in their salaries than New York City. You couldn't buy a 200 sq. ft. studio for half of what Giff is listing his house at. I never understood their algorithm for determining salary adjustments, but Houstonians fucking won that game.

Further evidence from the Washington Post on how ridiculous is the cost of housing in the San Francisco Bay Area.
Link, with more detail

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Mar 10, 2015 3:52 pm

I live in a city where the average price of a detached home has just hit $1 million (average townhouse is $600,000). Which is great for us homeowners... if we have plans to sell and move to Northern Ontario or Ohio.

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Tue Mar 10, 2015 3:57 pm

I wouldn't have guessed Pittsburgh would be the least expensive city on the list.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Tue Mar 10, 2015 3:57 pm

The Sybian wrote:I wouldn't have guessed Pittsburgh would be the least expensive city on the list.

That's pretty much the number one selling point for the city.

howard · Post by **howard** » Tue Mar 10, 2015 4:37 pm

Ryan wrote:If everyone lived as long as the oldest person in recorded history, the following people would still be around (but dead within the year):

Charles Atlas
Francisco Franco ("...is still alive")
Omar Bradley
Frances Ouimet
Mae West
Mao Zedong
Alfred Rosenberg and Hermann Goring (born on the same day)

Alfred Rosenberg is the underappreciated Nazi. The leading "intellectual" of the movement, crucial to the formulation of the final solution to the Jewish question, convicted and hung at Nuremberg, yet he gets much less ink than the other top Nazis. His diary was discovered a couple of years back; I'm waiting for a historian to plow through it and tell us if there is anything shocking or that can resolve an issue (like Goebbel's diary was a big piece of answering the Reichstag Fire thing.)

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 6:21 am

Today I learned that there's an official unofficial haircut amongst white women that communicates "I fuck black guys." It looks just like the "Can I speak to a manager?" haircut. And if that haircut is worn with large hoop earrings, game over.

As a black guy myself, hearing this from a fellow black co-worker was a revelation. Why was I never told this before?

howard · Post by **howard** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 6:32 am

Well, duh.

(never heard of such nonsense.)

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 9:00 am

Not getting that toothpaste back into the tube.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:42 pm

Does anyone else wish Will Ferrell would just go away for a while?

howard · Post by **howard** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:46 pm

Um, yeah, go muck up the Dodgers' spring training, dude.

ETA: I guess he is doing this thing with ten different teams, and it's for charity, so OK.

http://m.giants.mlb.com/news/article/11 ... rity-drive" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

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Rush2112 · Post by **Rush2112** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:36 pm

howard wrote:
ETA: I guess he is doing this thing with ten different teams, and it's for charity, so OK.

Why the hell can't he just write a check? Another thing that bugs the fuck out of me are celebrities calling for me to donate to this or that.

I've got an idea, live on the salary of an average American for a year and donate the rest of the 20 million dollar movie pay-out to the cause.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:39 pm

Agreed. Rather than effectively draw attention by playing in meaningless spring training games, Stand Up For Cancer should issue a press release with a single tasteful joke and a note that some comedians have made a donation to cancer. Unless that's too flashy.

Rush2112 · Post by **Rush2112** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:40 pm

I don't know, everyone is still too busy talking about ALS to care about cancer.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:41 pm

Another failed campaign that raised neither money nor awareness. Don't forget to mention LeBron too while we're doing this.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:46 pm

Discussing with a real world friend: How huge of a story is it if his helicopter goes down while switching games?

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:55 pm

mister d wrote:Discussing with a real world friend: How huge of a story is it if his helicopter goes down while switching games?

Non-story. Happens to race car drivers all the time and he should have learned that while researching to be Ricky Bobby.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:33 pm

Johnny Carwash wrote:Does anyone else wish Will Ferrell would just go away for a while?

Me too please.

About twenty minutes into that ABA movie he did, I realized that I'd had more than enough of him.

DC47 · Post by **DC47** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:36 pm

mister d wrote:Discussing with a real world friend: How huge of a story is it if his helicopter goes down while switching games?

If fatal, then it's big enough to double donations. Is this the plan?

I laughed during Semi-Pro, the movie about an ABA team in Flint. But I love the ABA and Flint. I saw Anchorman and was dismayed, except for the jazz flute bit. But I love jazz flute. I don't plan to see anything else he's in.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:42 pm

DC47 wrote:
mister d wrote:Discussing with a real world friend: How huge of a story is it if his helicopter goes down while switching games?
If fatal, then it's big enough to double donations. Is this the plan?

I laughed during Semi-Pro, the movie about an ABA team in Flint. But I love the ABA and Flint. I saw Anchorman and was dismayed, except for the jazz flute bit. But I love jazz flute. I don't plan to see anything else he's in.

Loved Anchorman, loathed Anchorman 2.

Although his real life personality seems nice enough, on film, he is becoming more and more like Jerry Lewis inasmuch as every scene of every movie seems to cry out "aren't I the best? Don't you love me?!"

And pair him with Paul Rudd and you have a comedic shit sandwich of epic proportions.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:47 pm

Pruitt wrote:
DC47 wrote:
mister d wrote:Discussing with a real world friend: How huge of a story is it if his helicopter goes down while switching games?
If fatal, then it's big enough to double donations. Is this the plan?

I laughed during Semi-Pro, the movie about an ABA team in Flint. But I love the ABA and Flint. I saw Anchorman and was dismayed, except for the jazz flute bit. But I love jazz flute. I don't plan to see anything else he's in.
Loved Anchorman, loathed Anchorman 2.

Although his real life personality seems nice enough, on film, he is becoming more and more like Jerry Lewis inasmuch as every scene of every movie seems to cry out "aren't I the best? Don't you love me?!"

And pair him with Paul Rudd and you have a comedic shit sandwich of epic proportions.

You sir, are dead to me. Between this and Michael Keaton...I just don't know about you man.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:48 pm

Oh fuck you.

(That was for Pruitt the Idiot, as he shall now be known.)

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:48 pm

mister d wrote:Oh fuck you.

Me or Pruitt. I'm ok either way, just wanted clarification!

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:59 pm

Agreed, Paul Rudd and Michael Keaton are acting deities. Canadians don't know humour!