The Swamp

So, I like know this guy who asked me to put together a tattoo for him based on an origami heart his girl friend made for him a long time ago. He and the other girl are each otherwise difficultly married. The folded-paper heart is finished (painted onto fabric actually) and looks really good. I thought it might need some profound text for the center of the heart. A short 3-5 word phrase to emphasize their secret relationship, the resiliency of this folded paper heart and their freakishly similar taste in music/art. It doesn't need to incorporate all of the former, just providing background.

Any suggestions are immensely appreciated.

Johnny Carwash wrote:Please shoot me down if this is as naive and horrible of an idea as I might suspect, but has anyone ever actually tried posting a missed connection on Craigslist or other similar site? Was in Boston last Friday and had a girl spontaneously strike up a conversation while walking beside me at the mall. Only lasted a minute and we went our separate ways, but she seemed to be sending signals of interest and of course I didn't pull the trigger.

I know the odds are miniscule at best, but would posting something be relatively risk-free, or am I just setting myself up for an avalanche of e-mails from trolls/con artists/psychos?

I tried that once. I was at a concert (a KEXP BBQ...saw the Saturday Knights, Helio Sequence, and the Dandy Warhols) and got talking with this gal. Well, more like babbling....we were both pretty ripping drunk. Anyways, we were standing there talking and dancing and whatnot, and I say "Hey....I'll go get us another round of beers"....but when I came back she was gone.

I figured "what the hell....I'll give it a try", and put something on the Missed Connections part of Craigslist. Got zero responses.

So sure...try it....but don't expect much....

AussieDave wrote:

Johnny Carwash wrote:Please shoot me down if this is as naive and horrible of an idea as I might suspect, but has anyone ever actually tried posting a missed connection on Craigslist or other similar site? Was in Boston last Friday and had a girl spontaneously strike up a conversation while walking beside me at the mall. Only lasted a minute and we went our separate ways, but she seemed to be sending signals of interest and of course I didn't pull the trigger.

I know the odds are miniscule at best, but would posting something be relatively risk-free, or am I just setting myself up for an avalanche of e-mails from trolls/con artists/psychos?

I tried that once. I was at a concert (a KEXP BBQ...saw the Saturday Knights, Helio Sequence, and the Dandy Warhols) and got talking with this gal. Well, more like babbling....we were both pretty ripping drunk. Anyways, we were standing there talking and dancing and whatnot, and I say "Hey....I'll go get us another round of beers"....but when I came back she was gone.

I figured "what the hell....I'll give it a try", and put something on the Missed Connections part of Craigslist. Got zero responses.

So sure...try it....but don't expect much....

Funny that this came up, as a very good friend got engaged just last week to somebody who she met via Missed Connections a few years ago. As the story goes, they met and chatted briefly in a city park. The next day she was posting some furniture for sale on Craigslist and decided to click on Missed Connections as a lark. Lo and behold, the fella had put something up regarding the encounter and she decided to go for it and contact him. Turns out that he wasn't a serial killer and the rest is history.

Johnny Hotcakes wrote:

AussieDave wrote:

Johnny Carwash wrote:Please shoot me down if this is as naive and horrible of an idea as I might suspect, but has anyone ever actually tried posting a missed connection on Craigslist or other similar site? Was in Boston last Friday and had a girl spontaneously strike up a conversation while walking beside me at the mall. Only lasted a minute and we went our separate ways, but she seemed to be sending signals of interest and of course I didn't pull the trigger.

I know the odds are miniscule at best, but would posting something be relatively risk-free, or am I just setting myself up for an avalanche of e-mails from trolls/con artists/psychos?

I tried that once. I was at a concert (a KEXP BBQ...saw the Saturday Knights, Helio Sequence, and the Dandy Warhols) and got talking with this gal. Well, more like babbling....we were both pretty ripping drunk. Anyways, we were standing there talking and dancing and whatnot, and I say "Hey....I'll go get us another round of beers"....but when I came back she was gone.

I figured "what the hell....I'll give it a try", and put something on the Missed Connections part of Craigslist. Got zero responses.

So sure...try it....but don't expect much....

Funny that this came up, as a very good friend got engaged just last week to somebody who she met via Missed Connections a few years ago. As the story goes, they met and chatted briefly in a city park. The next day she was posting some furniture for sale on Craigslist and decided to click on Missed Connections as a lark. Lo and behold, the fella had put something up regarding the encounter and she decided to go for it and contact him. Turns out that he wasn't a serial killer and the rest is history.

That has the making of a great rom-com where the catch is that it's the wrong person, but one or both don't realize it and it works out anyway.

Another way to make it even better is to go ahead and have the guy be a serial killer. Ha!

Broke up with the Hong Kong girl.

She's frustrated at work and can't get motivated at her job. Mad at her boss and co-workers etc... I was hoping to support her through this and be the person she could have fun with when she wanted to forget about work but she takes her frustrations out on me too.

So back to the drawing board....

You screwed up. What you should have done was chase her around the house saying "HOW ABOUT I COMFORT YOU WITH THIS DICK?". You'll learn.

ha!

couldn't even get to the house.. she shut everything out of her life.

Dated a hot girl for a couple of weeks, attempted a move last night, got rejected, got dumped today.

The usual :(

degenerasian wrote:Dated a hot girl for a couple of weeks, attempted a move last night, got rejected, got dumped today.

The usual :(

Eh, happens to the best of us. Hopefully you didn't quit cultivating leads during that couple of weeks and can hit up the bullpen.

P.D.X. wrote:

degenerasian wrote:Dated a hot girl for a couple of weeks, attempted a move last night, got rejected, got dumped today.

The usual :(

Eh, happens to the best of us. Hopefully you didn't quit cultivating leads during that couple of weeks and can hit up the bullpen.

Still have some leads.

But I really liked this one.

degenerasian wrote: But I really liked this one.

That's the big mistake right there...

(seriously...sorry to hear that...been there, ain't no fun).

AussieDave wrote:

degenerasian wrote: But I really liked this one.

That's the big mistake right there...

(seriously...sorry to hear that...been there, ain't no fun).

Yup.

It's so weird and frustrating at times. I know a lot of married girls around my age (37) and although they wouldn't be my type romantically they are really cool and we have a good relationship. They think I'm nice so they introduce their single friends to me (hey this guy is cool, you should meet him) and when the date is a disaster they don't get it so they introduce more! And after a few of these to be honest I end up doing my own self-evaluation. What's wrong with me that I can't keep any girl interested.

I get friendzoned so fast. Must have 100 of them. I even get the ugly unavailable girl to introduce her hot available friend. One date! Bang! friendzoned!

And I've changed it up, not all first dates are the standard drink, coffee or dinner. With this chick I took her to one of those Planatarium interactive nights which was a lot of fun. Second date I took her to a food festival. More talking and touching activities. This girl I was a bit more aggressive, made more moves quicker. Rejected!

At least I didn't get friendzoned. That's a start I guess.

degenerasian wrote:

AussieDave wrote:

degenerasian wrote: But I really liked this one.

That's the big mistake right there...

(seriously...sorry to hear that...been there, ain't no fun).

Yup.

It's so weird and frustrating at times. I know a lot of married girls around my age (37) and although they wouldn't be my type romantically they are really cool and we have a good relationship. They think I'm nice so they introduce their single friends to me (hey this guy is cool, you should meet him) and when the date is a disaster they don't get it so they introduce more! And after a few of these to be honest I end up doing my own self-evaluation. What's wrong with me that I can't keep any girl interested.

I get friendzoned so fast. Must have 100 of them. I even get the ugly unavailable girl to introduce her hot available friend. One date! Bang! friendzoned!

And I've changed it up, not all first dates are the standard drink, coffee or dinner. With this chick I took her to one of those Planatarium interactive nights which was a lot of fun. Second date I took her to a food festival. More talking and touching activities. This girl I was a bit more aggressive, made more moves quicker. Rejected!

At least I didn't get friendzoned. That's a start I guess.

Just hang in there and keep pitching. I one time tried to figure out how many first dates I went on post-divorce, and I figured it had to be close to 75 or so. And out of those, there were probably 5 or 6 that I was really interested in something beyond just having some fun and storming the castle. And of those, only 2 turned into anything. Its a total numbers game.

i have been on three first dates in my entire life. Dated one for a year, the next one for like three months, and then married the last one.

dating is weird!

testy boxcar wrote:i have been on three first dates in my entire life. Dated one for a year, the next one for like three months, and then married the last one.

dating is weird!

So lucky. That is one of my problems... I think my first date will be 'the one'.

At this rate I wish it was 1800 in China and I could just be arranged. Here! marry this girl, you'll meet her at the wedding ceremony, you'll both get drunk and you'll and fuck her that night.

AussieDave wrote:

degenerasian wrote: Yup.

It's so weird and frustrating at times. I know a lot of married girls around my age (37) and although they wouldn't be my type romantically they are really cool and we have a good relationship. They think I'm nice so they introduce their single friends to me (hey this guy is cool, you should meet him) and when the date is a disaster they don't get it so they introduce more! And after a few of these to be honest I end up doing my own self-evaluation. What's wrong with me that I can't keep any girl interested.

I get friendzoned so fast. Must have 100 of them. I even get the ugly unavailable girl to introduce her hot available friend. One date! Bang! friendzoned!

And I've changed it up, not all first dates are the standard drink, coffee or dinner. With this chick I took her to one of those Planatarium interactive nights which was a lot of fun. Second date I took her to a food festival. More talking and touching activities. This girl I was a bit more aggressive, made more moves quicker. Rejected!

At least I didn't get friendzoned. That's a start I guess.

Just hang in there and keep pitching. I one time tried to figure out how many first dates I went on post-divorce, and I figured it had to be close to 75 or so. And out of those, there were probably 5 or 6 that I was really interested in something beyond just having some fun and storming the castle. And of those, only 2 turned into anything. Its a total numbers game.

75? Holy shit.

degenerasian wrote:

testy boxcar wrote:i have been on three first dates in my entire life. Dated one for a year, the next one for like three months, and then married the last one.

dating is weird!

So lucky. That is one of my problems... I think my first date will be 'the one'.

I think this answers the question. If you go in with such high expectations, it probably comes off as desperation.

Brontoburglar wrote:

AussieDave wrote:

degenerasian wrote: Yup.

It's so weird and frustrating at times. I know a lot of married girls around my age (37) and although they wouldn't be my type romantically they are really cool and we have a good relationship. They think I'm nice so they introduce their single friends to me (hey this guy is cool, you should meet him) and when the date is a disaster they don't get it so they introduce more! And after a few of these to be honest I end up doing my own self-evaluation. What's wrong with me that I can't keep any girl interested.

I get friendzoned so fast. Must have 100 of them. I even get the ugly unavailable girl to introduce her hot available friend. One date! Bang! friendzoned!

And I've changed it up, not all first dates are the standard drink, coffee or dinner. With this chick I took her to one of those Planatarium interactive nights which was a lot of fun. Second date I took her to a food festival. More talking and touching activities. This girl I was a bit more aggressive, made more moves quicker. Rejected!

At least I didn't get friendzoned. That's a start I guess.

Just hang in there and keep pitching. I one time tried to figure out how many first dates I went on post-divorce, and I figured it had to be close to 75 or so. And out of those, there were probably 5 or 6 that I was really interested in something beyond just having some fun and storming the castle. And of those, only 2 turned into anything. Its a total numbers game.

75? Holy shit.

That's probably a low estimate. Its not that tough to run up that high a number, doing the online thing. I would generally be "working" 3 or 4 possibles at a time, and going on 1 or 2 first dates a week wasn't that much of a stretch. Most of them I never saw again.

God, I'm glad those days are over...

AussieDave wrote:
That's probably a low estimate. Its not that tough to run up that high a number, doing the online thing. I would generally be "working" 3 or 4 possibles at a time, and going on 1 or 2 first dates a week wasn't that much of a stretch. Most of them I never saw again.

God, I'm glad those days are over...

Once you change your username back can it just be DaveinPimplandia? The whole swamp lives vicariously though you.

The Sybian wrote:

degenerasian wrote:

testy boxcar wrote:i have been on three first dates in my entire life. Dated one for a year, the next one for like three months, and then married the last one.

dating is weird!

So lucky. That is one of my problems... I think my first date will be 'the one'.

I think this answers the question. If you go in with such high expectations, it probably comes off as desperation.

Yup definitely, I need to control this.

AussieDave wrote:

Brontoburglar wrote:

AussieDave wrote: Just hang in there and keep pitching. I one time tried to figure out how many first dates I went on post-divorce, and I figured it had to be close to 75 or so. And out of those, there were probably 5 or 6 that I was really interested in something beyond just having some fun and storming the castle. And of those, only 2 turned into anything. Its a total numbers game.

75? Holy shit.

That's probably a low estimate. Its not that tough to run up that high a number, doing the online thing. I would generally be "working" 3 or 4 possibles at a time, and going on 1 or 2 first dates a week wasn't that much of a stretch. Most of them I never saw again.

God, I'm glad those days are over...

Aussie Dave in Seattle. The Old Hoss Radbourne of "keep pitching".

Went out once (and once as not a date) with a girl last week who I'd become friends with over the last month or so. Super funny, extremely hot. Complete 90 yard punt.

It was the best first date I'd ever had, quite frankly, so I really liked my chances. Aaaaaand got the "I'm not looking for that right now" today. Sweet!

Just mindboggling isn't it.

Don't overanalyze, you did nothing wrong. This is what I tell myself.

Bro, does she even squat?

This past weekend I went to wine fest in Bad Durkheim. I proceeded to get shithammered drunk and seemingly teleported my way to the train station and then back an hour to my Jeep. I slept in my Jeep because driving would have been wrong. (But now that I think about it, just walking to my Jeep with the keys could have probably got me popped. Yikes.) Anyhoo, I met friends of friends and was invited to Thanksgiving at some random chick's house. Her and her husband are swingers and they are trying to put together one ginormous orgy. I'm guessing we'll be dressed like Pilgrims and Indians prior to. I'm not quite sure. Learning all of this in my inebriated state was odd. As was the Charlie Murphy-esque open hand smack I took from said female. I thought I did something wrong. Possibly too handsy? Well she like grabbing me. Did I insult her? Nope. Turns out she wants to be a dom when she grows up and whatever I said upon meeting her (no recollection save for learning about her swingerdom) apparently communicated that I was into getting hit. I think. My face still hurt on Sunday. Then the next day I woke up and I was 30.

I have Week 2 of my pool league with my newly found hot partner.

I have to learn to have no expectations. Just be myself, play well and meet other people.

Worst thing would be to freak her out in week 2! We still have 10 weeks to go!

Johnnie wrote:Bro, does she even squat?

yes!

degenerasian wrote:Just mindboggling isn't it.

Don't overanalyze, you did nothing wrong. This is what I tell myself.

I know I did nothing wrong... because, yeah, nothing.

Brontoburglar wrote:

degenerasian wrote:Just mindboggling isn't it.

Don't overanalyze, you did nothing wrong. This is what I tell myself.

I know I did nothing wrong... because, yeah, nothing.

But did you do anything right?

The Sybian wrote:

Brontoburglar wrote:

degenerasian wrote:Just mindboggling isn't it.

Don't overanalyze, you did nothing wrong. This is what I tell myself.

I know I did nothing wrong... because, yeah, nothing.

But did you do anything right?

of course, and it was a reason for optimism!

This thread makes me want to bang my head off of a knife.

Gunpowder: it really does.

Syb: We're always right!

First date: we look nice, we take the girl somewhere. We LISTEN to her. What girl doesn't want to be listened to? We show interest, we make her laugh and at the end we pay the bill.

What else could a girl look for on a first date? Every girl out there lists her top priorities of their ideal guy as someone who is confident, fun, and makes her laugh. We are doing this. Thus the reason for optimism.

Perhaps 2013 is now an entirely different world.

Johnnie wrote:Bro, does she even squat?

This past weekend I went to wine fest in Bad Durkheim. I proceeded to get shithammered drunk and seemingly teleported my way to the train station and then back an hour to my Jeep. I slept in my Jeep because driving would have been wrong. (But now that I think about it, just walking to my Jeep with the keys could have probably got me popped. Yikes.) Anyhoo, I met friends of friends and was invited to Thanksgiving at some random chick's house. Her and her husband are swingers and they are trying to put together one ginormous orgy. I'm guessing we'll be dressed like Pilgrims and Indians prior to. I'm not quite sure. Learning all of this in my inebriated state was odd. As was the Charlie Murphy-esque open hand smack I took from said female. I thought I did something wrong. Possibly too handsy? Well she like grabbing me. Did I insult her? Nope. Turns out she wants to be a dom when she grows up and whatever I said upon meeting her (no recollection save for learning about her swingerdom) apparently communicated that I was into getting hit. I think. My face still hurt on Sunday. Then the next day I woke up and I was 30.

Nice to see this thread getting interesting and positive, again! (I thought that now with DiS off the market, we weren't going see see any more of this sort of thing.)

degenerasian wrote:First date: we look nice, we take the girl somewhere. We LISTEN to her. What girl doesn't want to be listened to? We show interest, we make her laugh and at the end we pay the bill.

Where are you, the 1950's?

P.D.X. wrote:

degenerasian wrote:First date: we look nice, we take the girl somewhere. We LISTEN to her. What girl doesn't want to be listened to? We show interest, we make her laugh and at the end we pay the bill.

Where are you, the 1950's?

paying the bill? Girls still expect it and will mark you down if you don't.
Girls usually pay the 2nd date. But that could mean they like you or they just want to make it even since they don't plan to see you again.

degenerasian wrote:

P.D.X. wrote:

degenerasian wrote:First date: we look nice, we take the girl somewhere. We LISTEN to her. What girl doesn't want to be listened to? We show interest, we make her laugh and at the end we pay the bill.

Where are you, the 1950's?

paying the bill? Girls still expect it and will mark you down if you don't.
Girls usually pay the 2nd date. But that could mean they like you or they just want to make it even since they don't plan to see you again.

I think he meant showing respect to the girl.

ah. next first date I'm greeting her with a butt slap.

degenerasian wrote:ah. next first date I'm greeting her with a butt slap.

Too soon. End it with a butt slap.

The Sybian wrote:I think he meant showing respect to the girl.

P.D.X. wrote:

degenerasian wrote:ah. next first date I'm greeting her with a butt slap.

Too soon. End it with a butt slap.

She'll be disinterested by then.

degenerasian wrote:paying the bill? Girls still expect it and will mark you down if you don't.

Not sure about that. I had dinner once with 4 female friends when we were all single and started to talk about first dates, and 3 of them ripped me to shreds when I told them that stuff (and the last one is quite old school, so no surprises there).