Proud Parental Unit Crowing Thread

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Fri Oct 02, 2015 12:49 pm

Steve of phpBB wrote:
DaveInSeattle wrote:
Sabo wrote:
The Sybian wrote:Not for nuthin', but as a barista in Kona, she'll be working with a preeminent coffee beans at the source. It doesn't get much more prestigious than that in the coffee-making game.
Also, Kona (and the Big Island in general) is absolutely beautiful.
And seriously expensive to live there...
Can she support herself there as a barista?

Not a chance...

Post by **Sabo** » Fri Oct 02, 2015 2:50 pm

sancarlos wrote:
Sabo wrote:
The Sybian wrote:Not for nuthin', but as a barista in Kona, she'll be working with a preeminent coffee beans at the source. It doesn't get much more prestigious than that in the coffee-making game.
Also, Kona (and the Big Island in general) is absolutely beautiful.
Funny, when we got to Kona, I thought the plane made a wrong turn and sent us to Afghanistan. The hills where they grow coffee are great, and the beaches are awesome, but lots of dried lava makes it look otherworldly.

It's amazing how different is the landscape on the Hilo side of the island. Not sure if this is true, but somebody told there me that the Big Island has every temperature zone found on earth except the Saharan-type desert and the polar zones.

The bit about the climate zones is true. Mrs. Sabo and I were there in April, and we were stunned at how beautiful the big island is and how varied the climate. Hilo is in the SW part of the island and is in the middle of a rainforest. Kona-Kailua is more of a Mediterranean climate. But what's cool about the island is how parts of it look like other parts of the country. If you drive north of Hilo and go to the Laulahoehoe Point County Park, you'll be hard pressed to not think you're on the Maine coast. Drive inland along Saddle Road and at various points you'll think you're in Texas or New Mexico. Further north around Honokaa looks like the rolling hills of central Kentucky.

The lava fields in and around Hawaii Volcanoes National Park are awesome to see. There are some overlooks in the park where you can get sweeping view of the lava flows coming from the volcano to the ocean. It's pretty awesome to know you're in Hawaii and looking at about 20 miles of coastline that is completely uninterrupted with houses and resorts.

If Mrs. Sabo and I could afford to live there, I'd move to the big island in a heartbeat.

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Fri Oct 02, 2015 5:49 pm

Sabo wrote:If Mrs. Sabo and I could afford to live there, I'd move to the big island in a heartbeat.

My wife and I have also discussed maybe retiring there in about ten years, if our daughter's college education doesn't send us to the poor house.

Post by **Shirley** » Fri Oct 02, 2015 6:32 pm

Sabo wrote:Further north around Honokaa looks like the rolling hills of central Kentucky.

Really? You should have led with that!

Post by **Sabo** » Fri Oct 02, 2015 7:31 pm

sancarlos wrote:
Sabo wrote:If Mrs. Sabo and I could afford to live there, I'd move to the big island in a heartbeat.
My wife and I have also discussed maybe retiring there in about ten years, if our daughter's college education doesn't send us to the poor house.

Real estate on the big island isn't ridiculous like it is on Maui or Oahu, at least from what I can tell (assuming you're not interested in a shoreline property). Plus, the big island is large enough that you won't develop island fever as quickly as the other islands.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Sat Oct 03, 2015 12:03 am

Shirley wrote:
Sabo wrote:Further north around Honokaa looks like the rolling hills of central Kentucky.
Really? You should have led with that!

Suck it!

(Sorry to interrupt your John Hughes marathon or whatever)

Post by **Shirley** » Sat Oct 03, 2015 1:22 am

A_B wrote:(Sorry to interrupt your John Hughes marathon or whatever)

I wish. The pickins can be a little slim on Amazon Prime and I've been sticking with movies I haven't seen before. Mediocre one tonight. But don't worry, a new set of reviews is a comin'!

DC47 · Post by **DC47** » Sat Oct 03, 2015 2:21 am

The Sybian wrote:So what you guys are saying is I should drink more and take out my anger on my kids so they develop character. I'm on it.

Exactly. Also, after 60 years of angry conflict, you should have a change of heart, leading to at least 10 years of your kids talking with you every day and being your closest friends.

At least that combination worked for me.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Sun Oct 04, 2015 12:23 pm

Ok...the latest update on the GF's daughter: She spent the last week or so down in Bend, OR with The Guy, and they've had the big talk about their future, and their future plans together....So they've made a big decision...

He and his friend are going to move to Maui next week, buy a van for $2000, spend $700 to get it fixed up, and then the GF's daughter is going to join them, living in the Van (down by the river!). Then the 2 guys are going to get jobs with a company that does Mountain Bike Tours, and ask them if they can park the van in their parking lot while the 3 of them live there. And the Daughter is going to get a job teaching yoga, being a barista, and will buy a bike to get back and forth to work.

Sounds like a winner, right? What could possibly go wrong with that?

(and since I've heard about this, I've been walking around with the Chris Farley "LIVE IN A VAN, DOWN BY THE RIVER" going through me head)

howard · Post by **howard** » Sun Oct 04, 2015 2:14 pm

even the chris Farley character didn't share his van with two other people

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Sun Oct 04, 2015 2:28 pm

howard wrote:even the chris Farley character didn't share his van with two other people

A fair point....I'll have to bring that up (even though I'm trying to stay out of this)...

DC47 · Post by **DC47** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 1:45 am

Yeah, that's nuts. They should buy two vans, remove all but the front seats, and park them close together so that the side doors open to each other.

My girlfriend and I did this for a few months in the seventies. We typically parked without a permit in the parking lot of a 'hippie trailer park.' Two more old VW buses fit right in. We tried not to be there more than two nights in a row. It worked out great.

Making your crazy plans, living your dreams -- this is not the worst thing in the world to do in your early 20s. Who knows what will come out of it? Perhaps some good things. Lessons galore, unless the people involved are devoid of insight. And perhaps more. No one is likely to be permanently injured. It's not like she's going to law school.

I think there are a whole lot of people whose lives have been diminished in some way because they heeded the warning, sometimes internal, that "this will never work."

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 12:52 pm

sancarlos wrote:I shouldn't judge, but it seems many millennials have lived their whole life on scholarship from Mum and Dad and assume the gravy train will always be there for them. For some reason, this generation seems to have a sense of entitlement.

This behavior is learned. Our parents are baby boomers.

At least this millennial enlisted in the military 2 months after turning 17. And now I'm getting reprimanded because I didn't change the light bulbs for able bodied people in my squadron who aren't millennials. Talk about entitlement and "do as I say, not as I do" logic.

To echo Howard's perspective, this lifestyle offers me the ability to not live with my mom. She's still on section 8. She still hasn't held a steady job. She hides behind her ailments. And she's a baby boomer. So...It's all relative.

I don't know the situation with your GF's kid, Dave, but I need a lot more context. My gut tells me she's spoiled, but that would be short sighted. Regardless, personalities develop and somewhere some influences made her think that her ideals are achievable. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. I don't know.

But what I do know is that acting like one generation is more entitled than another is stupid.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 12:55 pm

Nah - we can all agree that Baby Boomers suck ass.

wlu_lax6 · Post by **wlu_lax6** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 1:29 pm

While this sounds crazy, this is a good times in her life to make mistakes and go for adventure. I know a bunch of folks who went for it with terrible plans right after school and have gone on to tremendous success. These folks tended to be entrepreneurs at heart and it exposed them to life, accept risks.

One of my friends was set for med school, decided to take a job at Anderson Consulting and make some money, he quit within a year to go to New Zealand to watch another buddy's brother compete in the America's cup (Sailed for America True) and did not come back. He then was a migrant apple picker and then crew on some rich guys yacht in the South Pacific. Came back to the states went to law school (JD and International Policy) and is with a big firm international firm living in Brazil.

I know a number of folks who graduated very good schools and did the ski bum thing for a while. They are all now well adjusted members of society (one owns a airplane maintenance company, another is a principal in a solar company).

Not sure if they are exceptions or the norm, but there are different paths to success and different definitions of success.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 1:45 pm

Johnnie wrote: I don't know the situation with your GF's kid, Dave, but I need a lot more context. My gut tells me she's spoiled, but that would be short sighted. Regardless, personalities develop and somewhere some influences made her think that her ideals are achievable. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. I don't know.

I'm not sure if I'd use the phrase "spoiled"...but her father certainly does enable her. My GF is almost always left having to be the "bad cop" in things.

I think part of her issue is that she's always been the hyper-driven/over-achiever type, and now that she doesn't have the structure of school and soccer, she's out at sea.

And is tough for me, because she's not my kid, but the whole situation is totally stressing out my GF, so I get to deal with the aftermath.

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 2:08 pm

I lean a little towards wlulax on this. What other time is she going to be able to do stuff like this? Does she have student loans or other debt that Mom or Dad have to cover in her absence? Boring jobs will always be there, stupid ass experiences like this won't. Plus, wasn't she a letterman on her soccer team? While I'm sure she had a great time, I doubt it offered her a ton of freedom.

Don't remind me of this post when all three of my kids refuse to leave the house before the age of 25.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 2:14 pm

govmentchedda wrote:I lean a little towards wlulax on this. What other time is she going to be able to do stuff like this? Does she have student loans or other debt that Mom or Dad have to cover in her absence? Boring jobs will always be there, stupid ass experiences like this won't. Plus, wasn't she a letterman on her soccer team? While I'm sure she had a great time, I doubt it offered her a ton of freedom.

Don't remind me of this post when all three of my kids refuse to leave the house before the age of 25.

Her student loans (of which she doesn't have a lot, but there is still some) have to start being paid off in November. So there is that. And she has had the summer to goof off and "have experiences" (going to Bali for 5 weeks of Yoga teacher training, and then 3 weeks in New Zealand, then 3 more weeks in Kona).

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 2:22 pm

Dave, fwiw, I agree with your girlfriend's approach. Have all the fun you want, discover yourself, etc. But, you have to support it financially, yourself.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 4:59 pm

sancarlos wrote:Dave, fwiw, I agree with your girlfriend's approach. Have all the fun you want, discover yourself, etc. But, you have to support it financially, yourself.

I think that's the only approach. She's pretty much set on doing this, and my GF has told her "Ok...you're on your own". The first step was telling her "You need to start paying $80 a month for your cell phone". And the GF has said told her she's not going to pay for a plane ticket so she can come home at Christmas time...its going to be Christmas in Maui in a van with 2 guys.

This is going to blow up in her face...the hard part will be avoiding the "told ya so" afterwards...

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Mon Oct 05, 2015 9:36 pm

DaveInSeattle wrote:
sancarlos wrote:Dave, fwiw, I agree with your girlfriend's approach. Have all the fun you want, discover yourself, etc. But, you have to support it financially, yourself.
I think that's the only approach. She's pretty much set on doing this, and my GF has told her "Ok...you're on your own". The first step was telling her "You need to start paying $80 a month for your cell phone". And the GF has said told her she's not going to pay for a plane ticket so she can come home at Christmas time...its going to be Christmas in Maui in a van with 2 guys.

This is going to blow up in her face...the hard part will be avoiding the "told ya so" afterwards...

I think this is the way to go. Let her sink or swim on her own. If she does this for a year or two then figures out a way to support herself in a better scenario than 2 Guys, a Girl in a Van. Worst sitcom ever. There is a good chance she realizes living 3 in a van isn't actually as cool as it sounds, and she decides to go a more traditional route. Maybe things actually work out, and she sets up a nice life for herself for a few years, or starts a sustainable yoga business eventually. If it was my daughter, I'd be seriously concerned, but as an outsider, I can see this being a formative experience, even if it is a disaster. The job situation for grads is fucking horrible, so why rush into a shitty job market? My biggest regret is going straight into law school after undergrad. I felt a gnawing feeling that i had to do something to move myself forward. I would have greatly benefited from taking a year off, either working in an office job, or as a cabana boy/ski lift operator or something.

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 8:12 am

The Sybian wrote:
DaveInSeattle wrote:
sancarlos wrote:Dave, fwiw, I agree with your girlfriend's approach. Have all the fun you want, discover yourself, etc. But, you have to support it financially, yourself.
I think that's the only approach. She's pretty much set on doing this, and my GF has told her "Ok...you're on your own". The first step was telling her "You need to start paying $80 a month for your cell phone". And the GF has said told her she's not going to pay for a plane ticket so she can come home at Christmas time...its going to be Christmas in Maui in a van with 2 guys.

This is going to blow up in her face...the hard part will be avoiding the "told ya so" afterwards...
I think this is the way to go. Let her sink or swim on her own. If she does this for a year or two then figures out a way to support herself in a better scenario than 2 Guys, a Girl in a Van. Worst sitcom ever. There is a good chance she realizes living 3 in a van isn't actually as cool as it sounds, and she decides to go a more traditional route. Maybe things actually work out, and she sets up a nice life for herself for a few years, or starts a sustainable yoga business eventually. If it was my daughter, I'd be seriously concerned, but as an outsider, I can see this being a formative experience, even if it is a disaster. The job situation for grads is fucking horrible, so why rush into a shitty job market? My biggest regret is going straight into law school after undergrad. I felt a gnawing feeling that i had to do something to move myself forward. I would have greatly benefited from taking a year off, either working in an office job, or as a cabana boy/ski lift operator or something.

Exactly my sentiment.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 8:14 am

Find something you love, do that for a living and you'll never work a day in your life.

Because no one is hiring in that field, you fucking dumbass.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 8:20 am

A_B wrote:Find something you love, do that for a living and you'll never work a day in your life.

Because no one is hiring in that field, you fucking dumbass.

Nice!

Wonder what the world's most overstocked professions are?

Actors

Yoga Instructors

Painters (not house painters)

Dog Walkers

Food bloggers

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 8:24 am

I can't take credit for that. I saw it on the internet in the past week or so.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 8:29 am

Pruitt wrote:
A_B wrote:Find something you love, do that for a living and you'll never work a day in your life.

Because no one is hiring in that field, you fucking dumbass.
Nice!

Wonder what the world's most overstocked professions are?

Actors

Yoga Instructors

Painters (not house painters)

Dog Walkers

Food bloggers

Stay at home moms ; )

howard · Post by **howard** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 9:52 am

I'm on board with the sentiments above that this is a fine thing for a young adult graduate to do. I would expect some degree of continued enabling by dad and even mom will be part of the picture, but that is fine too.

Except the three people in one van part. That is just plain stupid.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 9:55 am

Yeah. Maybe this will change as the kids age and get independent, but my biggest concern there is "6 hours and one ocean away with some dude she's known a month in a fucking van", not "she doesn't want a 9 to 5 yet".

sancarlos · Post by **sancarlos** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:05 am

Speaking of "a fucking van"... Given the hormones of young folks in the early throes of a romantic relationship, I suppose that third wheel guy is going to have plenty of evenings where he ought to roll over and try not to watch/hear the festivities right next to him.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:36 am

sancarlos wrote:Speaking of "a fucking van"... Given the hormones of young folks in the early throes of a romantic relationship, I suppose that third wheel guy is going to have plenty of evenings where he ought to roll over and try not to watch/hear the festivities right next to him.

I brought that up with the GF last night. Are they going to give Skippy (or whatever the 3rd wheel's name is) $10 and tell him to go to the movies?

And what about cooking? Showers? Keeping food cold?

And now...get this...the daughter has told my GF that she's "uncomfortable" with how much the GF and I drink. So a 23 year old slacker/hippie who's going to Maui to live in a van (down by the river!) has a problem with us having 2 glasses of wine with dinner in the evenings.

Grrrrr....

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:41 am

Given all that's going on, I'm uncomfortable with you drinking that much.

Should be much, much more.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:45 am

Your fucking avatar has been perfect atleast twice today.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:45 am

A_B wrote:Given all that's going on, I'm uncomfortable with you drinking that much.

Should be much, much more.

That's what I said..."Doesn't she know that she's the reason we drink?"

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Wed Oct 07, 2015 10:46 pm

Given the choice of the flu shot or the nasal spray, my 4 year old picked the shot and didn't cry.

rass · Post by **rass** » Thu Oct 08, 2015 5:47 am

mister d wrote:Given the choice of the flu shot or the nasal spray, my 4 year old picked the shot and didn't cry.

Nice. From my wife's description, it sounds like they needed half of the doctor's office to chase and then hold down my screaming 9 year old for her shot. This was after her younger sister went with little to no fuss. Same kid got her ears pierced this summer with just a tear or two, and throws her body around on the soccer field all of the time. I don't get kids. Just glad I didn't have to be there this year...

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Thu Oct 08, 2015 9:06 am

mister d wrote:Given the choice of the flu shot or the nasal spray, my 4 year old picked the shot and didn't cry.

My son is freaked out by the spray and always chooses the shot. I would choose the shot, too.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 1:03 pm

Surprise, Surprise...The GF's daughter and her "live the hippie life" in Maui hasn't worked out. Turns out the reality has come crashing all around their ears. First off, the car that the two guys bought to "carry our surfboards" only runs in 1st or 2nd gear, with no reverse. And now the mountain bike park, where the two guys have been working, and where the 3 of them were living in a shed (with no electricity), is being sold at the end of January. So there goes the job for the 2 guys, and the free place to live.

So the one guy has bailed, and is coming home, and now the GF's daughter and her BF are going to do the same. She'll come back to Seattle, and then they are going to Bend, OR (which is where the Boyfriend is from) to find jobs, and hopefully a rental house they can share with a couple of other people. And it sounds like the daughter is now more motivated about figuring out what she wants to do with her life. The Boyfriend? Well...his first idea was "lets go to New Zealand!" (with no thoughts about having no money, and no jobs or work visas when they get there). And then he said that he wants to get a job with Patagonia as a "Gear Tester". I was laughing about that one all night.

Its going to be tough to stifle the "Told Ya So" when she gets back, but I'll try to manage it.

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 1:08 pm

DaveInSeattle wrote:Surprise, Surprise...The GF's daughter and her "live the hippie life" in Maui hasn't worked out. Turns out the reality has come crashing all around their ears. First off, the car that the two guys bought to "carry our surfboards" only runs in 1st or 2nd gear, with no reverse. And now the mountain bike park, where the two guys have been working, and where the 3 of them were living in a shed (with no electricity), is being sold at the end of January. So there goes the job for the 2 guys, and the free place to live.

So the one guy has bailed, and is coming home, and now the GF's daughter and her BF are going to do the same. She'll come back to Seattle, and then they are going to Bend, OR (which is where the Boyfriend is from) to find jobs, and hopefully a rental house they can share with a couple of other people. And it sounds like the daughter is now more motivated about figuring out what she wants to do with her life. The Boyfriend? Well...his first idea was "lets go to New Zealand!" (with no thoughts about having no money, and no jobs or work visas when they get there). And then he said that he wants to get a job with Patagonia as a "Gear Tester". I was laughing about that one all night.

Its going to be tough to stifle the "Told Ya So" when she gets back, but I'll try to manage it.

Eh, she will be better for the experience. Hell, I wish I spent a couple months in Hawaii. Just be glad she figured this out before too long, and before something bad happened. Sounds like a shame she didn't breakup with the BF during the ordeal. Bend would be awesome for you. Set up a bunch of brewery tours!

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 3:20 pm

Glad that it seems to be on the verge of working itself out.

A few lost months and returning safely. Experience and no harm done.

DaveInSeattle · Post by **DaveInSeattle** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 3:30 pm

Pruitt wrote:Glad that it seems to be on the verge of working itself out.

A few lost months and returning safely. Experience and no harm done.

Yeah, and hopefully its the "kick in the pants" to get her motivated beyond being a barista and yoga instructor (not that there's anything wrong with either of those jobs...just not really a workable career path).

But of course she made this decision after my GF bought a plane ticket to go see her in March. D'oh!