Random Thoughts About Thoughts Random

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Tue May 26, 2015 5:17 pm

Whenever I see a dude in a salon I just assume he's there for the female attention.

Post by **brian** » Tue May 26, 2015 5:18 pm

travzilla wrote: The worst. Becauase I get a new person most of the time, I find my self lying profusely. Sometimes they make assumptions and I just go with it, sometimes I just completely pretend I have a different life.

Oh shit, I thought I was the only person who did this. I'd never do it with someone I went to regularly, but I just go to Great Clips and the turnover there is crazy so sometimes I'll just make up random stuff if they try to engage me in conversation (Like I'm getting a haircut before a trip to China or if they ask me what I do for a living I'll say I'm a plumber* or something unbelievably boring** and shit like that. Makes the 20 minutes go faster.)

* - One time I actually got a plumbing related question but I told the woman she wouldn't want to go through my company because we were insanely expensive so I referred her to a handyman I know who really does do that stuff. That was a win-win.

** - Ironically my actual job is probably more boring than just about anything I could possibly make up but I hate explaining it to people. Most everyone at least knows what a plumber does.

bfj · Post by **bfj** » Tue May 26, 2015 6:59 pm

Been going to the same salon for almost 20 years. Great people, family owned and operated. I had a haircut before a wedding I was in from a mall salon and they butchered my hair. I looked ridiculous in all of the pictures. My wife(then gf) took me to her place and I haven't gone anywhere else since.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Tue May 26, 2015 9:19 pm

I go to the woman my wife uses. She's pretty hilarious. And it's close to a good Mexican place. Win win.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Tue May 26, 2015 9:47 pm

I do salon over barber because my hair has some weird angles and stuff and barbers love razors. And I can walk to it in under 2 minutes. And they have a little water cooler with lemons in it.

Johnny Carwash · Post by **Johnny Carwash** » Tue May 26, 2015 10:17 pm

Glad to see that this has spun off a deep dive on whether its acceptable for a dude to go to a "salon." I've almost exclusively gone to a salon all my life, even though I just keep my hair short and simple. They do have a majority female clientele, but they certainly do serve a good number of guys (who aren't just creepers). My main complaint is that I usually end up waiting nearly as long as I'm in the chair, typically because some dumb housewife showed up 45 minutes late to an hour appointment ahead of me.

For those that think going to a salon is unbecoming of a proper man's man, what's your suggested alternative? A barber shop? In my limited experience with barber shops, you're made to feel intensely unwelcome if you're less than 70 years old and/or to the left of Rush Limbaugh. Plus, barber shops seem to only offer one style: buzzed on the sides, and longer, wetted, and parted on top (aka "the Hitler"). Barber shops can eat a red-and-white striped dick. I'm gradually thinning on top, but if I ever switch away from a salon it will likely be to just clipping it myself at home.

MaxWebster · Post by **MaxWebster** » Tue May 26, 2015 10:46 pm

killing me

Johnny Carwash wrote: Barber shops can eat a red-and-white striped dick.

Post by **brian** » Tue May 26, 2015 11:27 pm

I used to go to a salon here that catered solely to men. It was pretty cool actually. But $40 plus tip every five weeks was an expense I decided to cut.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Wed May 27, 2015 5:52 am

I am bald.

While I have been told by my wife that I am more handsome than Mel Cooley, if I let my hair grow in, int would look like this.

So every second or third day I shave my own head.

But I can still remember sitting in salons under a heat lamp to get my curls to curl

Even though it's been gone for a while, I miss my hair.

Giff · Post by **Giff** » Wed May 27, 2015 8:10 am

I shave my own head and the wife makes sure I get everything in the back. It's free and I'm typically naked when I do this, so win/win again!

elflaco · Post by **elflaco** » Wed May 27, 2015 8:16 am

salon? no a fucking chance.

barbershop all the way.

town i live in has four barbershops... tried them all, settled on one ...been going there 9yrs now.... go with the boy, every 9or so weeks.. walk in around 830,9am on a saturday, early enough that wait is very short if any. always coffee and donuts for all. a couple of old italian guys cutting hair, one who is a stand up comic plus a woman barber.
tried the hair-cuttery places when i was but a lad.. its been well over 25 yrs since i went to a salon for any other reason than to pick up my wife.

nothing like a barbershop shave either. straight razor.

BSF21 · Post by **BSF21** » Wed May 27, 2015 8:20 am

Giff wrote:I shave my own head and the wife makes sure I get everything in the back. It's free and I'm typically naked when I do this, so win/win again!

Multi-level nightmare for Mister D.

a) you're naked so now you're itchy everywhere instead of just on your face and neck.

b) you've got to be naked around a woman.

I can feel the shuddering from here.

Giff · Post by **Giff** » Wed May 27, 2015 8:23 am

a) It's so I can hop right in the shower once I'm done.
b) I make her get naked too! win/win/win!

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Wed May 27, 2015 8:40 am

BSF21 wrote:Multi-level nightmare for Mister D.

Oh shit, he's gonna get me good ...

BSF21 wrote:a) you're naked so now you're itchy everywhere instead of just on your face and neck.

Yup! So right. So itchy. But I got a feeling he's saving the good one. Think he'll go there???

BSF21 wrote:b) you've got to be naked around a woman.

Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!! Went there!!!

BSF21 wrote:I can feel the shuddering from here.

More like shaking with laughter. You got me good. Great work, made my morning!

BSF21 · Post by **BSF21** » Wed May 27, 2015 9:24 am

mister d wrote:
BSF21 wrote:Multi-level nightmare for Mister D.
Oh shit, he's gonna get me good ...

BSF21 wrote:a) you're naked so now you're itchy everywhere instead of just on your face and neck.
Yup! So right. So itchy. But I got a feeling he's saving the good one. Think he'll go there???

BSF21 wrote:b) you've got to be naked around a woman.
Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!! Went there!!!

BSF21 wrote:I can feel the shuddering from here.
More like shaking with laughter. You got me good. Great work, made my morning!

I knew I'd zing you good with those ones. Tremble with laughter! I'll make a fan out of you yet, you fearer of naked womens you.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Wed May 27, 2015 10:16 am

brian wrote:I used to go to a salon here that catered solely to men. It was pretty cool actually. But $40 plus tip every five weeks was an expense I decided to cut.

$40? 45 minutes? Seriously...what the fuck are you people having done to your hair?

Post by **brian** » Wed May 27, 2015 10:24 am

Jerloma wrote:
brian wrote:I used to go to a salon here that catered solely to men. It was pretty cool actually. But $40 plus tip every five weeks was an expense I decided to cut.
$40? 45 minutes? Seriously...what the fuck are you people having done to your hair?

Well, just a haircut is like $12-$15 most places around here. The $40 was a shampoo, scalp massage, haircut, they trimmed your neck hair with a straight razor, post-cut shampoo and styling and a paraffin dip for your hands.

ETA: Oh and all the stylists were smoking hot. I shouldn't leave that out.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Wed May 27, 2015 10:34 am

No happy ending?

Post by **Shirley** » Wed May 27, 2015 10:44 am

brian wrote:a paraffin dip for your hands.

I've never even heard of that. Is that like, wax for removing hair from your hands? Or is it some sort of manicure thing?

Post by **brian** » Wed May 27, 2015 10:55 am

Shirley wrote:
brian wrote:a paraffin dip for your hands.
I've never even heard of that. Is that like, wax for removing hair from your hands? Or is it some sort of manicure thing?

Nah, it doesn't remove hair (at least I don't think). I think it's just for softening them.

You just dip your hands into this wax (it's not thick, it's watery) and it coats your hands. The stylists puts some rubber gloves and oven mitts on your hands for a few minutes and then it just peels off.

rass · Post by **rass** » Wed May 27, 2015 10:56 am

Shirley wrote:
brian wrote:a paraffin dip for your hands.
I've never even heard of that. Is that like, wax for removing hair from your hands? Or is it some sort of manicure thing?

Vegas baby!

Post by **Shirley** » Wed May 27, 2015 11:57 am

Does it affect your pinkie ring?

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Wed May 27, 2015 12:22 pm

Just got a haircut. ITCHY.

L-Jam3 · Post by **L-Jam3** » Wed May 27, 2015 12:42 pm

When I was in L.S. in Newark, I would get my haircuts in the Ironbound, a Brazilian/Portuguese neighborhood. The barber there would not only use the straight razor for shaving, but also for cutting hair. I have a relatively easy cut that I've been wearing for about 15 years now (clipper sides, slightly longer on top with an inch in the front to play with), but that was definitely a new one.

Seriously though, I love going to the barber. I would take a good shave and a haircut over a mediocre blowjob any day of the week and twice on Saturdays.

The Sybian · Post by **The Sybian** » Wed May 27, 2015 1:18 pm

L-Jam3 wrote:When I was in L.S. in Newark, I would get my haircuts in the Ironbound, a Brazilian/Portuguese neighborhood. The barber there would not only use the straight razor for shaving, but also for cutting hair. I have a relatively easy cut that I've been wearing for about 15 years now (clipper sides, slightly longer on top with an inch in the front to play with), but that was definitely a new one.

Seriously though, I love going to the barber. I would take a good shave and a haircut over a mediocre blowjob any day of the week and twice on Saturdays.

My definition of a mediocre blowjob is a hell of a lot better than your definition. In college I went to a really old Italian barber. $5 haircut, and he would spend a ton of time on my hair, which usually requires 5 minutes to give me a decent cut. This guy would take a small straight edge and etch a perfect edge all around my hair.

govmentchedda · Post by **govmentchedda** » Wed May 27, 2015 1:25 pm

The Sybian wrote:
L-Jam3 wrote:When I was in L.S. in Newark, I would get my haircuts in the Ironbound, a Brazilian/Portuguese neighborhood. The barber there would not only use the straight razor for shaving, but also for cutting hair. I have a relatively easy cut that I've been wearing for about 15 years now (clipper sides, slightly longer on top with an inch in the front to play with), but that was definitely a new one.

Seriously though, I love going to the barber. I would take a good shave and a haircut over a mediocre blowjob any day of the week and twice on Saturdays.
My definition of a mediocre blowjob is a hell of a lot better than your definition. I...went to a really old Italian barber...$5, and he would spend a ton of time on...me...This guy would take a small... pe.e.n...

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Wed May 27, 2015 1:26 pm

The Sybian wrote:
L-Jam3 wrote:When I was in L.S. in Newark, I would get my haircuts in the Ironbound, a Brazilian/Portuguese neighborhood. The barber there would not only use the straight razor for shaving, but also for cutting hair. I have a relatively easy cut that I've been wearing for about 15 years now (clipper sides, slightly longer on top with an inch in the front to play with), but that was definitely a new one.

Seriously though, I love going to the barber. I would take a good shave and a haircut over a mediocre blowjob any day of the week and twice on Saturdays.
My definition of a mediocre blowjob is a hell of a lot better than your definition. In college I went to a really old Italian.... $5 ... and he would spend a ton of time ... usually ... 5 minutes ... This guy w... a s... straight.. and .. perfect ...

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Wed May 27, 2015 1:27 pm

Dangit!

rass · Post by **rass** » Wed May 27, 2015 1:33 pm

Hey. I'm here for the gang bang?

The Sybian wrote:
L-Jam3 wrote:When I was in L.S. in Newark, I would get my haircuts in the Ironbound, a Brazilian/Portuguese neighborhood. The barber there would not only use the straight razor for shaving, but also for cutting hair. I have a relatively easy cut that I've been wearing for about 15 years now (clipper sides, slightly longer on top with an inch in the front to play with), but that was definitely a new one.

Seriously though, I love going to the barber. I would take a good shave and a haircut over a mediocre blowjob any day of the week and twice on Saturdays.
I...blow...really old Italian...guy.s...all straight

P.D.X. · Post by **P.D.X.** » Wed May 27, 2015 1:34 pm

I've paid for exactly two haircuts in my entire life. First time I went to the hipster barbershop across the street from me in Portland because it was Halloween and I wanted to go as Mola Ram so needed my head shaved. They gave me a High Life which was awesome but really hard to drink while sitting still. Much to my dismay they wouldn't do a full service, so after they clipped me down I had to go home and finish the job with a Gillette.

Second time I was in a coastal city in north Colombia and was feeling a bit shaggy so found a jenky barbershop where a big black woman gave me the ol' number 1 and a rinse/massage for like $2.

howard · Post by **howard** » Wed May 27, 2015 4:21 pm

L-Jam3 wrote:I would take a good shave and a haircut over a mediocre blowjob any day of the week and twice on Saturdays.

Me too. I love my barber, but frankly he uses too much teeth.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Wed May 27, 2015 6:44 pm

L-Jam3 wrote:When I was in L.S. in Newark, I would get ... in ... a ... relatively easy ... 15 year...o...l...d... with an inch in the front to play with... that ... would take a good shave and a ... mediocre blowjob ... on Saturdays.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Thu May 28, 2015 10:07 am

This past Sunday, I was in my driveway washing the cars and parked across the street was my neighbor's boyfriend's car who I don't know. So as a joke I washed half of his car right down the middle. Made the driver's side immaculate and left the passenger side filthy.

That's funny, right?

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Thu May 28, 2015 10:15 am

John Spano Jr. was just convicted of a third forgery/con man/whatever thing and faces up to 16 years in prison. If he had stolen 3 candy bars he'd be facing a mandatory life sentence.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Thu May 28, 2015 10:16 am

Jerloma wrote:This past Sunday, I was in my driveway washing the cars and parked across the street was my neighbor's boyfriend's car who I don't know. So as a joke I washed half of his car right down the middle. Made the driver's side immaculate and left the passenger side filthy.

That's funny, right?

I think so but he was probably upset.

rass · Post by **rass** » Thu May 28, 2015 10:17 am

Jerloma wrote:This past Sunday, I was in my driveway washing the cars and parked across the street was my neighbor's boyfriend's car who I don't know. So as a joke I washed half of his car right down the middle. Made the driver's side immaculate and left the passenger side filthy.

That's funny, right?

I'm going with weird.

Bensell · Post by **Bensell** » Thu May 28, 2015 10:22 am

brian wrote:
travzilla wrote: The worst. Becauase I get a new person most of the time, I find my self lying profusely. Sometimes they make assumptions and I just go with it, sometimes I just completely pretend I have a different life.
Oh shit, I thought I was the only person who did this. I'd never do it with someone I went to regularly, but I just go to Great Clips and the turnover there is crazy so sometimes I'll just make up random stuff if they try to engage me in conversation (Like I'm getting a haircut before a trip to China or if they ask me what I do for a living I'll say I'm a plumber* or something unbelievably boring** and shit like that. Makes the 20 minutes go faster.)

* - One time I actually got a plumbing related question but I told the woman she wouldn't want to go through my company because we were insanely expensive so I referred her to a handyman I know who really does do that stuff. That was a win-win.

** - Ironically my actual job is probably more boring than just about anything I could possibly make up but I hate explaining it to people. Most everyone at least knows what a plumber does.

Same here. I go to Great Clips and almost never see the same people. I make up stories about random shit. Last time I got a cut I was talking about how I had to meet a deadline on an interview for a political magazine when the chick responded I thought you were a college professor - apparently she remembered my last bullshit story and I had no clue she'd cut my hair before. People with memories like that scare me.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Thu May 28, 2015 10:26 am

Gunpowder wrote:John Spano Jr. was just convicted of a third forgery/con man/whatever thing and faces up to 16 years in prison. If he had stolen 3 candy bars he'd be facing a mandatory life sentence.

I'm watching the 30 for 30 and also had no idea that the thug Bruins went into the stands once.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Thu May 28, 2015 2:03 pm

Just had lunch with an old co-worker/friend of mine.

May be the loudest person I have ever been with. And oblivious to the fact that everyone sitting near us was staring at him as he ranted.

mister d · Post by **mister d** » Thu May 28, 2015 2:41 pm

Took me a while to find the prank referenced elsewhere but that's absolutely funny.