Fantastic Cover Letter

[govmentchedda]

A criminal defense attorney/friend of mine received this cover letter today.


Dear Mr. XXXXXX,
I try with all of my capacity to persistently put myself in a position for opportunity and seize it. As a first year law student at Stetson University of Law, I crave a challenge/the pressure. When the clock is ticking, I want the ball. I am not afraid of the failure that hold so many of us back. I do not allow people to outwork me in any power of my existence.

TaeKwonDo instilled discipline and a work ethic into my veins at a young age. It has translated to every sector of my existence. During my first four years of baseball try-outs, I failed to make the team. My Friday and Saturday nights consisted of pitching and a savage workout throughout these years. Junior year, I made the Varsity Baseball team for the number one ranked school on Long Island.

During college, my professors incessantly reminded me how difficult it was to get an internship in sports. My senior year I accepted a Full time job in the Tampa Bay Rays Front Office. I dominated my colleagues who were older and more experienced in the revenue department.

In order to be superior, I sincerely believe an athlete, student or professional must be different from the rest. One must endure sacrifices and visualize the immediate and distant future. I possess the vision, desire, and tenacity to succeed through all sectors of my life. These precise traits will enable me to excel as a law clerk.

I take pride in my work and see it as a personal responsibility to work when no one is looking. I believe that my knowledge, enthusiasm and vision would serve as an asset to the Law Offices of XXXXXXXX. Thank you in advance for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,
XXXXXXX

[A_B]

And now Bronto's cover(ha!) is blown.

[mister d]

You call that kid in just to see him in person, right?

[brian]

You'd like to see him take that letter to another level though.

"I got my college girlfriend pregnant just by giving her an intense stare."

[P.D.X.]

You call that kid in just to see him in person, right?

[The Sybian]

You call that kid in just to see him in person, right?

I was thinking internet meme sensation Alexander Vayner

[Rex]

Ha! Sounds more like this guy though.

http://gawker.com/309684/nightmare-onli ... -the-world" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[ZMan]

I call these guys "The bosses dilemma"

They probably bust their ass at work, and can make you a lot of money. but they're such fucking douche nozzles, you wonder if you can be in the same room with them for 10 minutes without strangling them.

Our top sales guy is a perfect example of this.

[rass]

but they're such fucking douche nozzles, you wonder if you can be in the same room with them for 10 minutes without strangling them.

Well, they are Long Islanders.

[cerrano]

but they're such fucking douche nozzles, you wonder if you can be in the same room with them for 10 minutes without strangling them.

Well, they are Long Islanders.

boo yah!!!

[Johnny Hotcakes]

Amazing! Reminds me of this beauty that made its way around North American accounting circles a few years ago. The partner first forwarded it on to others and it quickly took off. The chain of forwards attached to the copy that I was sent were just as good (not to mention the fact that the kid misspelled "Touche" in his signature).




From: XXXXXXXX (US - New York)
Sent: Wednesday, September 17, 2008 3:54 PM
To: XXXXXX (US - New York)
Subject: Draft to XXXXXX

Hi XXXXX,

I hope this finds you well. Having only started at Deloitte & Touche LLP this week, I wanted to reach out to you before I left for National Training this Sunday. Over past three days, waves of information have been surging out from projectors and screens, but your presentation this morning piqued my interests and has been akin to a surfboard. Instead of swimming through the information, I am riding on top it.

Your talk on the current credit crunch was reassuring and inspiring. That is why I asked that critical question – to learn from a partner. On the first day, XXXXXX commented on this starting class, saying "you are entering the profession during exciting times." While recent events are unfortunate, I am interested to the steps the profession, regulators, and industry will take over the past few months; and ultimately, I aim to better serve my clients and Deloitte, armed with that first-hand knowledge. To me this is "exciting."

When I first interviewed with Deloitte. One of my interviewers asked if I had some future goals in sight. My reply was simple and straightforward, and more than likely, it is a common desire. "I am here to become a partner. To spend the next 20 years of my life here." I am only 3 days into my career, but I hold true to that statement.

Your candor, honesty, and knowledge impressed me. If you ever have need of an enthusiastic Audit Assistant, I am more than willing to suit up, jump in, and catch a wave. And if you are interested to know, I actually do surf.

Thank you once again and I look forward to hearing from you in the future.


XXXXXXX
Audit Assistant
AERS/Financial Services Industry
Deloitte & Touch LLP

[testuser2]

Those are great. I was never a full supporter of the mantra "just try harder". It's roughing watching someone try to mash the square peg into the round hole. See http://leanin.org/ for an example of a whole movement based on the concept.