Courtesy of the NY Post's weird but true section...
A homless woman defecated in a xxxxxxxxxx front yard and then broke into the home's backyard where she took a dip in the pool, police said.
Cheryl Beauchamp, 35, was booked on suspicion of burglary and criminal mischief. A xxxxxxxxxx police report said: "Cheryl advised me that she was passing through xxxxxxxxxx on her way to Washington DC, to yell at President Obama"
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 2:25 pm
by Gunpowder
I'd guess Florida, as it would be pretty cold in Ohio this time of year to be both homeless AND swimming.
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 4:25 pm
by Jerloma
Yeah but would you ever have to pass through Florida to get to DC? Was she coming from the Bahamas?
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 5:57 pm
by DSafetyGuy
Jerloma wrote:Yeah but would you ever have to pass through Florida to get to DC? Was she coming from the Bahamas?
There are places in northern Florida one might pass through if headed to Washington DC from someplace in southern Florida.
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 6:04 pm
by DC47
ZMan wrote:Courtesy of the NY Post's weird but true section...
A homless woman defecated in a xxxxxxxxxx front yard and then broke into the home's backyard where she took a dip in the pool, police said.
Cheryl Beauchamp, 35, was booked on suspicion of burglary and criminal mischief. A xxxxxxxxxx police report said: "Cheryl advised me that she was passing through xxxxxxxxxx on her way to Washington DC, to yell at President Obama"
One of the new Republican congresswomen then. And she's already a part of the leadership group.
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 1:52 pm
by Gunpowder
Jerloma wrote:Yeah but would you ever have to pass through Florida to get to DC? Was she coming from the Bahamas?
Maybe she was a crazy homeless lady shitting in yards who didn't really have her story or directions straight?
How the fuck does this shit happen? 10 years? Were they in a well in the basement? That's just some dedication to keep that shit under wraps in the goddamned burbs. Not exactly a remote location.
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Tue May 07, 2013 8:30 am
by rass
Not to make light of the situation, but this interview with the neighbor who helped rescue the women is fanfuckingtastic:
In what might be the most American way to accidentally shoot oneself, a [redacted] man shot himself while bowling last night, after his bowling ball came into contact with the loaded gun in his pocket.
"The guy just stepped up to bowl," fellow-bowler Jim Miller told [redacted]. "I think he hit his leg on his back swing."
The man shot himself around 7:30 last night while bowling at [redacted] Lanes. Another bowler reported that "The ball hit him in the leg, which triggered the revolver."
Witnesses originally thought the gunshot was a firecracker, but after watching the bowler limp back to his seat, holding his leg, they knew it was a gun.
He was taken to a hospital shortly after, but the man's injuries are not considered to be life-threatening.
Proud to see that my native state and current home state are in both the most courteous and most cursing rankings. Have a nice day, you cocksucking motherfuckers.
"There is no serious thinking, no serious planning, about any of this going on at the state level," says Chuck Watson, a disaster-impact analyst with longtime experience in Florida. "The view is, 'Well, if it gets real bad, the federal government will bail us out.' It is beyond denial; it is flat-out delusional."
Local governments, including Broward and Miami-Dade counties, have tried to compensate by forging regional agreements to cut carbon pollution and upgrade infrastructure to make their cities more resilient, but without help (and money) from the state and federal governments, it's pretty ineffective. Given how much Florida has to lose from climate change, the abdication of leadership by state and federal politicians is almost suicidal – when it isn't downright comical. Watson recalls attending a meeting on natural-hazard-response planning in South Florida, funded by the Federal Emergency Management Agency and the state: "I mentioned sea-level rise, and I was treated to a 15-minute lecture on Genesis by one of the commissioners. He said, 'God destroyed the Earth with water the first time, and he promised he wouldn't do it again. So all of you who are pushing fears about sea-level rise, go back and read the Bible.'"
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 2:29 pm
by DSafetyGuy
I read that article an smiled. Miami being eradicated is a huge plus.
A XXXX man was arrested for strangling his mother's puppy, cutting it up and then cooking it, police said Friday.
...
On Thursday morning, he strangled the 5 to 6-month-old puppy, killing him, police said. Huggins then cut up the dog into quarters and put it in the freezer for future meals, XXXX Police said.
Later that night, a family member called police, and when authorities arrived they found the dog's ribs being cooked on the stove, and its head in the garbage, police said.
Isn't Checkers drive-thru only? At least I think the one near us is (I've never eaten there, though).
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 8:14 am
by Gunpowder
Ours have outdoor tables, so I guess that's Florida.
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 8:16 am
by rass
Icepenis wrote:Ours have outdoor tables, so I guess that's Florida.
Fucking Sherlock Homes.
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 8:18 am
by Gunpowder
rass wrote:
Icepenis wrote:Ours have outdoor tables, so I guess that's Florida.
Fucking Sherlock Homes.
I get these correct at about a 90% clip.
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 8:19 am
by Sabo
rass wrote:
Icepenis wrote:Ours have outdoor tables, so I guess that's Florida.
Fucking Sherlock Homes.
Well, that and there aren't any Checkers restaurants in Ohio (at least I've never seen any).
Re: The OFFICIAL Florida -or- Ohio Thread
Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 11:25 am
by GoodKarma
Sabo wrote:
rass wrote:
Icepenis wrote:Ours have outdoor tables, so I guess that's Florida.
Fucking Sherlock Homes.
Well, that and there aren't any Checkers restaurants in Ohio (at least I've never seen any).
There used to be...been replaced by Rally's...I believe they are the same ownership. Like how we have Hardee's here in the East and Carl's Jr. in the west.