The Swamp

Here's a closer look. Our pet giant ground sloth has been auto-named Donner. Bengal will train him to assist with work tasks as well as turn into a ferocious killing machine when the need arises. We have a basic stock of supplies to get us started, along with a few weapons to assign—rifle (Nonlinear), pistol (chedda), and knife (bengal).



BFJ immediately vomits. Great, material to work with already!

One neat mod I found displays character interactions as bubbles onscreen. Should make for some interesting screen caps.

Collapsing like a bitch sounds like a solid survival strategy.

Am I just always about eating man-meat?

rass wrote: ↑Fri Nov 16, 2018 8:02 am Collapsing like a bitch sounds like a solid survival strategy.

I laughed out loud reading that.

He then became a mindless construction drone and was subjected to brutal social experiments, leaving him incapable of creative thought or leadership. His life revolves around food and he will often pig out even when not especially hungry.

This is hauntingly close.

I'm amazed at how similar the people in this group are to people in the real Swamp!

So after a few days we have a rudimentary base set up with barracks, a common area, storage space, and fields to grow essential crops. As we get the basic survival things under control we'll start branching out into more advanced crafting and making things more secure.



We get our first real threat as a local hare goes crazy and attacks rass. This should be no problem for rass, armed with a wooden club, right? Wrong. After a few minutes of fighting, rass collapses in shock, riddled with hare bites. Nonlinear rushes to the scene and attempts to shoot the hare, but is unable to score a hit and ends up just bashing it to death with his rifle butt. BFJ carries the unconscious rass to safety as Nonlinear doesn't appear to be especially concerned.

A group of pigs wanders into our territory and decides to join the colony. We can use them to breed and sell or serve as a source of meat/footballs in an emergency. Note: The floating hearts here represent the pigs having sex, while Nonlinear just "happened" to be skipping by and totally was not trying to watch.



Some interesting conversations continue to take place...

Johnny Carwash wrote: ↑Fri Nov 16, 2018 12:53 pm

Getting a Linus and Lucy (from the end of The Great Pumpkin) vibe from that one.

Or maybe Samwise and Frodo?

So I'm a pessimist who used to be a slave but is now (sort of) a doctor?

Talk about being a stereotype.

And I forgot how funny this game is...

With the basics in place, we expand the base to include a few workshops. BFJ gets set up with his sculptor table and goes to work:

- "Eloquence of Pruitt": Pruitt chatting with chedda at a party
- "Attempt of Devastation": an image of a triangle
- "Pruitt of Blue": Pruitt playing chess while yaks play nearby
- "Guts": an enormous purple fireball falling to the ground
- "River": rass welcoming BFJ while narwhals play nearby

We sell several of them to some passing traders for about $200. Here's what the in-game descriptions of the sculptures look like, by the way:



A hostile faction, The Black Elk Biko, gets wind of our modest prosperity and launches a "raid," but luckily for us it's comprised of just one guy. We move into attack positions as he advances: chedda and Nonlinear with the guns, bengal/rass/Pruitt with melee weapons if he somehow gets close enough. BFJ refuses to use weapons but tags along to watch for future sculpture ideas.



The raider is easily dropped by a hail of bullets. I decide to let Nonlinear indulge his taboo and turn the raider into a few meals, which he consumes over the next few days:



Look at that meal! Disgusting! I mean, really...two starches?! Nonlinear gets a significant mood boost but this...does not go over well with the others. I'll need to limit this to an occasional thing to keep the group's morale stable.

Unfortunately, I failed to adequately prioritize the hygiene of the cooking area, and the gradual accumulation of dirt, trash, and vomit led to an outbreak of food poisoning, with people vomiting in the vicinity and thus perpetuating the cycle.



I put a couple people on an emergency cleaning detail to sanitize the place and make some doormats around the main building to hopefully limit this in the future. Also the doormats are made from the skin of the guy Nonlinear ate earlier.

An alpaca wanders into the base and self-tames. A bear in the vicinity decides to hunt BFJ for food, but as everyone is indoors at the moment, heads to our livestock pin where it kills the alpaca and one of our pigs. Pruitt foolishly attempts to attack the bear close up with a wooden club. The bear bites Pruitt on the right arm and tears off the little toe of his left foot. Nonlinear rushes to the scene with his rifle, but has also gotten food poisoning and has to stop to vomit first. Finally he arrives and together with chedda shoots the bear dead.



Pruitt's arm wound develops an infection and he also gets food poisoning (of course), but he pulls through.

As we reach mid-summer, a heat wave sets in, which sends the temperatures rocketing over 110 despite the mild climate. I set up some simple cooling devices, but am working on a more extensive power grid so we can get some proper A/C going.

On the bright side, a huge meteorite made of solid gold ore impacted nearby. (Note: this is also the GOP's economic plan for 2019.)

By the way, we now have a couple of people whose plant growing skills have reached level 4, which will allow the colony to grow smokeleaf (space pot). That should help with the stress levels.

Can't I just eat my man-meat in peace? Why y'all gotta be so sensitive?

Is there a podiatrist in Rimworld?

Pruitt wrote: ↑Mon Nov 19, 2018 10:54 am Is there a podiatrist in Rimworld?

Yes, he's a goy though.

brian wrote: ↑Mon Nov 19, 2018 10:57 am

Pruitt wrote: ↑Mon Nov 19, 2018 10:54 am Is there a podiatrist in Rimworld?

Yes, he's a goy though.

Any port in a storm.

Some Debate As To Whether Human Meat Is Kosher

First off, something I messed up—I didn't realize that certain animals require a higher Handling skill to maintain, and so unfortunately our pet ground sloth Donner returned to the wild, but is still roaming around the vicinity. Bengal is our highest animal handler and is almost at the required level (requires 9; bengal is 8). I'm having bengal work with some other animals to build up his skill so that he'll hopefully be able to re-tame Donner soon.

Anyway, a few uneventful days pass and we use the down-time to expand our base some more, with everyone now getting private bedrooms:



Meanwhile, BFJ continues his output:
- "An Orange Expression": an okapi suspended in the air eating a turnip
- "A Titled": a silhouette of a boxer eating an onion
- "Despair by Chedda": rass handing chedda a drink while grinning broadly
- "Nearness with rass": rass talking to himself while grinning broadly
- "Strength of bengal": bengal playing horseshoes and massaging his wrists
- "BFJ by White": a sculpture of BFJ himself making a previous sculpture

We mine out that golden meteorite and sell the gold along with several sculptures for a healthy haul of supplies, including the essentials:



Our research progresses to the point where we can make our own firearms, and now all colonists are armed with some kind of gun except for Pruitt (who uses a knife) and BFJ (who refuses to fight).

Someone appears on the horizon, running from his life, seeking refuge from pursuing raiders. Look, it's EnochRoot!



EnochRoot spent his childhood as a cow farmer before stowing away on a trade ship. He somehow ended up as a master chef. He is very good at cooking and handling animals, and may be able to get Donner back for us. He has an unusually strong immune system and is "trigger-happy."

Note: I don't know what EnochRoot looks like in real life, so I made him look like Space Zorro here.

And here come three raiders on our tail, from the Armadillos of Torment. Interestingly, they are all female--what is Enoch not telling us? We move into defensive positions but the raiders split up, complicating things. Nonlinear drops the first raider from a safe distance with a couple of rifle shots.



The other two, apparently uninterested in fighting our colonists, wheel around and head to our livestock pen, where they savagely attack our pigs. They kill one pig and badly wound two others before bengal and chedda rush over and open fire.



Their shots miss and the raiders turn and charge. chedda is stabbed repeatedly in the chest. Finally the others converge on the scene and we surround the two raiders in a fierce melee. Pruitt suffers a cracked sternum. rass pushes his way to into the fray and pistol-whips one raider to death, then shoots the other through the torso. Damn, rass, really looking to redeem your reputation after getting your ass kicked by a rabbit earlier.



Looks like Pruitt is pissed about getting his kills stolen there. Anyway, welcome EnochRoot!

Oh shit! EnochRoot approaches Donner and attempts to re-tame him, but something goes horribly wrong and Donner attacks!



Enoch tries to run away but Donner viciously tears him to death. RIP Space Zorro, hope you enjoyed the few minutes you spent as one of our colony.

I should have added "some other poor asshole who shows up later" as an option for the "Who dies first?" poll, but anyway, that ended up being the correct answer. Sorry, no winners this time.



The others rush out to stop their rampaging former pet. We manage to shoot Donner a few times, but the giant sloth can absorb a huge amount of damage and things devolve into a desperate whirlwind of claws, teeth, and weapons. rass characteristically drops early in the fight despite not being badly injured and is again carried to safety by BFJ (who happened to be stoned at the time). Finally we get Donner to collapse, wounded but still breathing.



Along with rass, bengal is heavily bleeding from several serious wounds. The medical crew will have their work cut out. The good news is that Donner, in his subdued state, has ceased being hostile and still has a chance to be re-tamed if he survives.

Stay tuned...

Death by sloth.

Too bad this is Swampville VI and not Swampville Se7en. You could have some fun engineering appropriate deaths for everyone.

I didn't vote for the sloth. You all suck.

Best. Pet. Ever.

Finally. Vengeance has come to the man who stole my rightful starting CF position 2 years ago.

That was indeed revenge served ice cold with a side of sloth.

Nonlinear FC wrote: ↑Wed Nov 21, 2018 9:24 am Best. Pet. Ever.

Poor Donner was just protecting us from that masked weirdo.

I’m pretty sure ZorroRoot was only trying to feed Donner a laxative (sloths poop once a week).

Strange. ZorroRoot’s fate bears some similarity to the American killed by a bow and arrow on the remote Andaman Island.

EnochRoot wrote: ↑Wed Nov 21, 2018 1:54 pm Strange. ZorroRoot’s fate bears some similarity to the American killed by a bow and arrow on the remote Andaman Island.

Always try to avoid experiencing a "misplaced adventure."

Pruitt wrote: ↑Wed Nov 21, 2018 2:00 pm

EnochRoot wrote: ↑Wed Nov 21, 2018 1:54 pm Strange. ZorroRoot’s fate bears some similarity to the American killed by a bow and arrow on the remote Andaman Island.

Always try to avoid experiencing a "misplaced adventure."

Dude was likely proselytizing. Something Root aint got no time for.

RIP, you glorious (& slow) bastard.

The combat logs that are automatically generated are something. Here's how the sloth fight played out (shown in reverse chronological order):

[+] spoiler

Bruise in the body caused Donner to drop feebly.
Bengal hit Donner with a slam from his revolver's barrel, smashing his body and spine.
Nonlinear struck Donner, wounding his front left leg.
Pruitt missed Donner with a pierce from his knife.
Donner scratched Pruitt in the torso viciously.
Chedda clobbered Donner in the body.
Bengal shoved Donner, jabbing his rear left leg agonizingly.
Pruitt jabbed Donner in the tail.
Donner avoided Nonlinear's bolt-action rifle clobber.
Donner missed Pruitt with a tear from his left claw.
Chedda slammed Donner in the rear left leg.
Pruitt used his knife to hack Donner, slashing his front right leg.
Bengal used his revolver's barrel to poke Donner, poking his rear right leg.
Nonlinear slammed Donner, smashing his body and spine.
Pruitt stabbed Donner in the stomach, making him scream from the agony.
Chedda smashed Donner with his revolver's grip, smashing his front right leg.
Bengal flailed.
Nonlinear struck Donner in the body, leaving the area visibly deformed.
Pruitt struck Donner in the body, leaving an enormous bruise.
Donner wobbled from chedda's attack.
Chedda struck Donner in the nose.
Donner avoided bengal's revolver smash.
Nonlinear smashed Donner, bruising his front left leg.
Pruitt smashed Donner, injuring his body.
Donner scratched bengal in the torso.
Bengal flailed while trying to poke Donner.
Pruitt stabbed Donner with a knife, injuring his rear right leg.
Bengal used his revolver's barrel to smash Donner, injuring his body.
Donner avoided Pruitt's knife pierce.
Donner floundered.
Pruitt missed Donner with a slash from a knife's blade.
Bengal slammed Donner with his revolver's grip, clobbering his jaw.
Pruitt struck Donner in the body.
Rass crumpled.
Donner used his firm right claw to cut rass, wounding his left leg and torso.
Rass, wielding his revolver skillfully, smashed Donner in the body.
Bengal smashed Donner, smashing his body.
Donner's rear left leg was damaged by Nonlinear's apt bolt-action rifle bullet.
Donner's front right leg was pierced by Nonlinear's bolt-action rifle bullet.
Bite in the torso caused EnochRoot to die.
Donner tore EnochRoot in the torso while wearing a blank look.
Donner scratched EnochRoot in the left arm ruthlessly.
Donner flailed while trying to tear EnochRoot with his left claw.
Donner floundered.
Donner tore EnochRoot, cutting his torso and left leg.

EnochRoot seized Donner sharply and barked a command.
EnochRoot slowly approached Donner.
EnochRoot showed a relaxed attitude towards Donner.
EnochRoot came near Donner while talking to himself about justice.

Bite in the torso caused EnochRoot to die.
Donner tore EnochRoot in the torso while wearing a blank look.
Donner scratched EnochRoot in the left arm ruthlessly.
Donner flailed while trying to tear EnochRoot with his left claw.
Donner floundered.
Donner tore EnochRoot, cutting his torso and left leg.

Man, way to put up a fight there Enoch

Sloths are hard, man.

EnochRoot came near Donner while talking to himself about justice.

Sloth justice!

Following the battle with our former pet sloth Donner, our brief acquaintance EnochRoot gets a proper burial (sorry Nonlinear, not this time). The others who were wounded recover safely. We show mercy and nurse Donner back to health. He returns to the wild, no longer hostile but still not re-tamed.

So this was a thing I didn't expect: Pruitt and Nonlinear spontaneously feed the corpses of the raiders from the last attack to the recovering pigs who had been injured. Payback! Meanwhile, Pruitt has bonded with one of the pigs and named it Tom-Tom. Its status is elevated to a pet and will follow Pruitt around, and can even be released to attack.



Training up his animal handling skills in the hope of eventually re-taming Donner, bengal tames a couple of alpacas, who proceed to have sex in the room where we store our food.



BFJ smokes too much pot and passes out on the dining room floor in front of some visiting guests. Pruitt hauls him to bed and he is OK for now.

Another refugee appears on the horizon, chased by tribespeople. Hey, it's duff!



duff grew up in a cave complex deep beneath the surface of an inhospitable world, taming fungus crops. He then went on to become a space pirate. He has a couple of common traits with other colonists that should help him feel at home: like chedda, he is a night owl, and like Nonlinear, he is a cannibal.



We dispatch duff's pursuers with relative ease. Welcome duff, hopefully you'll last longer than the previous new joiner.

A woman named Ololnosa from another faction stops by for a visit. She has a conversation with rass, during which she "openly insults his value as a human" and they fight! Ololnosa bites rass on the foot, headbutts him, and punches in the torso. rass collapses. Ololnosa remains in our dining room, apparently convinced she is still welcome.

Another raid: this time by the South Evebium Libertarian Unification. And one of the attackers is duff's mother! Unfortunately, Bengal happens to be far from the base collecting resources and is directly in the path of the arriving raiders. Without warning he is shot 8 times, including by duff's mom, "Skye," and falls to the ground, still alive but heavily wounded.

The good news is that the raiders are not here to try to take over our base. The bad news is that they are here to kidnap who they can and then leave. Bengal is hauled off by a raider named "Dweeb" (who is female, by the way). Our other colonists take up arms and head out to the fight but they're too far away--Bengal disappears off the horizon, over the shoulder of his captor.



Meanwhile, duff is chased by a 72-year woman named "Sage" with a knife. Backup arrives and Sage is shot dead, while rass and Nonlinear work in casual conversation about vacations. The other raiders flee, but Bengal is already lost...at least for now.



Winter was already setting in, and now we've been hit with an unusual cold snap that will send temperatures plunging toward the single digits. We were already short on food, and our crops are rapidly dying from the freeze. We'll need to rely on hunting the local wildlife to survive for the near future...though Nonlinear and duff have "other" options.

Stay tuned...

This has taken a devastating turn.

All they wanted was scores on the front page. Blame yourself.

High five duff!

Welcome to the newly formed Man Meat Club (Sandwich) Club.

To be fair, whom among us hasn't...

BFJ smokes too much pot and passes out on the dining room floor in front of some visiting guests. Pruitt hauls him to bed and he is OK for now.

Dibs on Ololnosa!