The Swamp

Third time around...



Last year's thread

2018 Season Recap
The Burlington Sports Frogs fell short in the defense of their 2017 title, slipping to a wild-card berth before losing to the division rival Middlesex Offenders in the conference championship series. They remain in a strong position to contend after keeping their core of star players intact.

The Holland Oats, newly formed from various Burlington rejects and cast-offs, had an impressive debut season, riding a strong second half to a division title and all the way to the conference championship, where they fell to the juggernaut eventual champion Corpus Christi Brinkleys. This year they'll have to prove whether that success was a fluke, as they face strong competition within the division.

Season Honors and Awards:
- All Stars: wlu_lax, Pruitt, A_B, Gunpowder, govmentchedda (BUR), rass, Rams Fanny (HOL)
- Gunpowder won the Unknown Award as the team MVP for Burlington as voted by his peers.
- Rams Fanny won the Unknown Award as the team MVP for Holland as voted by his peers.
- Gunpowder finished third in the Bensell Conference MVP voting.
- Rams Fanny won the Shrew Conference Rookie of the Year Award.
- Gunpowder and Sabo captured the Bensell Conference Silver Slugger Awards at their respective positions.


Offseason
After last year's big shakeup where we spun off a new team and moved over a bunch of guys, I kept it simple this year and just re-signed all free agents with their same teams. So, everyone will remain a Frog or an Oat as they were last year, unless you really don't want to for some reason, in which case let me know and I'll see what we can work out.

Salary arbitration hearings held over the winter saw a number of players get various degrees of raises as shown in the below chart, which BSF will definitely not taunt EnochRoot over:




I probably won't be putting quite as much content in the regular update posts this season, but will still be updating the league stats site for those who want to explore the full details.

Updated player cards should be up in the next few days, followed by the start of the season to coincide with the MLB opening day next week.

cha-ching

Glad you are back and doing productive things in your life. Keep up the good work.

You might want to just hand Gunpowder $430 mil and get it over with.

Off to the gym to work out the kinks...

I showed up to camp in the most average shape of my life.

Can I get one of those really big checks to go with my big raise?

For what it's worth, here's what the in-game "experts" are predicting for the upcoming season:

Was there a typo, or did I switch positions and somehow still score a huge raise via arbitration?

Carwash...how did you technically do against the goals that ownership setup for you for both teams? I could not find that in the website.

What are this years?

rass wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 11:21 am Was there a typo, or did I switch positions and somehow still score a huge raise via arbitration?

Or maybe that's how you scored it ; P

Johnny Carwash wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 11:19 am For what it's worth, here's what the in-game "experts" are predicting for the upcoming season:

Just take a moment to enjoy the absolute brilliance of those team names!

rass wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 11:21 am Was there a typo, or did I switch positions and somehow still score a huge raise via arbitration?

Typo, you're still a catcher.

wlu_lax6 wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 11:41 am Carwash...how did you technically do against the goals that ownership setup for you for both teams? I could not find that in the website.

What are this years?

I believe you don't get the owner's message on season expectations until the very start of the regular season. I can't remember how we did last year, but I'm guessing both owners were happy at least getting to the semifinal round. It's in an in-game screen that doesn't export to the site.

Pruitt wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 1:53 pm Just take a moment to enjoy the absolute brilliance of those team names!

Speaking of which...I was thinking of replacing "Nassau Tourists" with something else. No offense to that one, but it's a little too "cool" of a place for the character of the league. Any suggestions for something in the South that's not too close to one of the others in that division?

Tupelo Honeys
Biloxi Blues

(is Natchez, MS too close to Shreveport, because if not...)

Florida Mans.

Bristol (TN/VA) Meyers or Bristol Squibs
Great Falls (MT) Down (like the fabric)
Panama (FL) Jaxs
Hot Springs Leeks

Macon Whoopees

or, Macon Bacon

rass wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 11:21 am Was there a typo, or did I switch positions and somehow still score a huge raise via arbitration?

Savannah Whites
Charleston Chews
Jackson Nine
Milledgeville Unwilling Participants

Do I have a bionic elbow?

Last year I had Tommy John surgery and missed no time.

06/29/2018 Injured on 06/27/2018, diagnosed with a torn flexor tendon in his elbow, will miss 13 months.

Rocket City (Huntsville) Trash Pandas

degenerasian wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 3:22 pm Do I have a bionic elbow?

Last year I had Tommy John surgery and missed no time.

06/29/2018 Injured on 06/27/2018, diagnosed with a torn flexor tendon in his elbow, will miss 13 months.

Canadian health care!

brian wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 3:26 pm Rocket City (Huntsville) Trash Pandas

I remember when they had that poll, and if this hadn't won, I was going to use it here.

Baton Rouge Red Batons of New Orleans
Mobile Homes
Oxford (MS) Commas
Leroy (LA) Jenkins
Two Egg (FL) Omelets

sancarlos wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 2:56 pm Macon Whoopees

or, Macon Bacon

Greenville (SC) Reds
Perry (SC) Masons
Athens (Ga) Spartans
Murfreesboro (Tenn) Swinging Belgians
Bentonville (Ark) Discounters

Shelbyville (KY) Shelbyvillians

A_B wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 3:45 pm Baton Rouge Red Batons of New Orleans
Mobile Homes
Oxford (MS) Commas
Leroy (LA) Jenkins
Two Egg (FL) Omelets

Mobile Homes is a good one.

A_B wrote: ↑Mon Mar 25, 2019 3:45 pm Baton Rouge Red Batons of New Orleans
Mobile Homes
Oxford (MS) Commas
Leroy (LA) Jenkins
Two Egg (FL) Omelets

Those are flawless.

STARTING LINEUP



2019 Salary: $14.9M (Contract Year)

A_B secured a second straight All-Star berth with another fine season at the plate. Following another significant salary bump via arbitration, he's now coming into his contract year and looking to maximize his market value. One of the league's better-hitting catchers, A_B has a nice, even stroke and good power to the gaps. He is a dependable defensive catcher who can also play first in a pinch. He continues to be slow as shit on the basepaths.

Head Scout says: "A_B is a Steady Eddie. Shows up, does the job."




2019 Salary: $11.5M

Brontoburglar followed his stellar but injury-riddled 2017 campaign with a mostly-healthy but curiously underwhelming season last year, seeing significant drop-offs in nearly every major offensive category. Whether he can reclaim his earlier form is one of the team's biggest question marks going into the new season. Bronto may not have the big-time power of some first basemen, but brings a smooth stroke and good batting eye to the plate. He is a slick fielder who can also play the outfield when needed.

Head Scout says: "Brontoburglar has a good head on his shoulders."




2019 Salary: $30.0M

Surly superstar wlu_lax registered another season at the plate and cashed in with a monster contract in the offseason, perhaps to the quiet chagrin of the clubhouse. He remains one of the league's best players, with outstanding all-around batting talents that regularly put him near the top of the leaderboards in multiple categories. In the field, he is sure-handed with good range, and skilled at turning the double play. The big caveat remains his personality, described previously as "greedy, lazy, disloyal, and devoid of leadership skills...basically a cornucopia of every bad personality trait." Welcome back, wlu_lax!

Head Scout says: "wlu_lax has very little loyalty and often shows a lack of effort."




2019 Salary: $765k

Ryan's first season as the regular starting shortstop was met with mixed results, as he needed a relatively strong second half to inch his WAR into positive territory. He won't wow anyone at the plate, but is a fair contact hitter who managed to improve his power from "nonexistent" to "eat shit, Rafael Belliard" last year. He can also use his above-average speed to leg out a decent number of triples. In the field, he has good range, though his relatively weak arm hampers him somewhat at short.

Head Scout says: "Ryan is comfortable in front of a camera."




2019 Salary: $16.0M

Local favorite Pruitt saw a drop-off in his numbers following a big extension last year, but still remains one of the league's better first basemen. Despite a steep decline in his eye-popping HR total from two years ago, Pruitt's quick wrists and good judgment keep him a persistent threat to go deep, and he won't strike out as much as some other power hitters. In the field he is adequate if unspectacular, with a solid arm, and cut down his errors from 26 to 12 last year.

Head Scout says: "Pruitt is an outstanding representative of the team. The fans love him."




2019 Salary: $6.0M

Wacky clubhouse clown bapo! rebounded from a mediocre 2017 campaign to improve his stats across the board and prove a versatile if unspectacular player. At the plate, bapo! is a decent singles-and-doubles hitter, but not too much of a power threat. His speed is just above average, but he is a savvy runner who who swiped a surprising 24 bases last year. He is an adequate outfielder.

Head Scout says: "bapo! lacks drive and has trouble keeping up."




2019 Salary: $1.8M

EnochRoot, who had a surprisingly fine 2017 season taking over the center field spot from BSF21, saw his production take a hit after securing the full-time job last year. As a hitter, Enoch is capable of posting a decent average and fair power, though he struggled again versus lefties (.218 BA) and may end up platooned at least some of the time. He led the team with 39 steals, though his 20 time caught suggest his judgment could improve. He can fill all three outfield positions with good range.

Head Scout says: "EnochRoot is mild mannered."




2019 Salary: $8.7M

Gunpowder took over the regular RF spot following duff's departure and built off his 2017 debut to emerge as one of the league's top power hitters, finishing second overall with 51 homers and being voted the team's MVP. He also significantly cut-down his strikeout rate, proving an excellent well-rounded hitter who can also draw a good share of walks. Gunpowder has fair speed and is a heads-up runner and sure-handed fielder.

Head Scout says: "Gunpowder is a likeable teammate."

BENCH / PART-TIME STARTERS



2019 Salary: $510K

No stranger to splitting duties with another man, Giff took over the righty platoon spot with A_B at the catcher spot. Though his performance at the plate didn't impress too many, Giff is widely admired in the clubhouse for his steadying presence. He has surprisingly above-average speed for a catcher and can also play second base adequately.

Head Scout says: "Giff is born to be a captain of men."




2019 Salary: $1.1M

The "Jewish Olmedo Saenz" put in another year of serviceable work as a backup first baseman and pinch hitter, though his power numbers were slightly down. BFJ offers some pop off the bench from both sides of the plate, and shockingly stole a base last year. He can also catch in emergency situations.

Head Scout says: "BigFatJew is even tempered," unless of course he finds a cinnamon raisin bagel in the clubhouse.




2019 Salary: $850K

Versatile glove man GoodKarma took advantage of the offseason shakeup to secure a regular roster spot, and filled in capably at 3B for a number of games while Pruitt was injured. GoodKarma's great range and fundamentals allow him to fill in at any infield position, and is a fair hitter who'll occasionally knock an extra-base hit.

Note: The in-game manager advisor AI keeps telling me to start GoodKarma at SS over Ryan, which could be a subplot to follow this year.

Head Scout says: "GoodKarma never shows any lack of effort."




2019 Salary: $1.3M

Baloney, whose teammates inexplicably voted to re-sign him over some other vets after the 2017 season, had trouble finding playing time last year but remains floating around the lower levels of the depth chart. Baloney can fill in adequately at all infield positions. He has a little pop in his bat and OK plate discipline, but probably won't be able to make consistent contact at the major league level.

Head Scout says: "Baloney is intelligent on and off the field."




2019 Salary: $510k

That French Guy saw minor action mostly as a late-inning defensive sub or pinch runner, not really showing enough to make a clear judgment. TFG's utility is built around his impressive speed, making him an ideal pinch runner and rangy defensive sub in the outfield. At the plate, he struggles to lay off bad pitches, but can surprise by poking a double or triple here and there.

Head Scout says: "That French Guy is a simple man who enjoys simple pleasures."




2019 Salary: $1.5M

Former minor league stud Rex finally got his shot at the bigs last year, but didn't show too much as an occasional starter or pinch hitter. Rex's quick bat gives him some decent pop, but he's yet to show he can make consistent contact in the majors. He is a fair corner outfielder and a cautious runner.

Head Scout says: "Rex has a questionable work ethic and is thick-headed."




2019 Salary: $650K

kranepool again failed to crack the Sports Frogs' depth chart, spending most of the year in AAA before getting a handful of trips to the plate in September. His natural position is first base, but he can also hold down a corner outfield spot. kranepool's most unique skill is his uncanny ability to swipe an occasional base despite mediocre speed.

Head Scout says: "Fuck kranepool."

STARTING ROTATION



2019 Salary: $13.5M

Sabo entered 2018 as the team ace in his contract year, but put up a surprisingly subpar showing. Nevertheless, he was signed to a seven-year extension with the hope he can bounce back to his earlier form. An aggressive righty, Sabo mixes up a formidable arsenal topped by a quality curveball and slider. His one downside is his control, which though not terrible, occasionally gets away from him. His high stamina means we'll likely see another 200+ innings from him barring injury.

Head Scout says: "Sabo is exceptionally unexceptional."




2019 Salary: $16.0M

In contrast to Sabo, angry Charlie Sheen impersonator brian followed up his excellent 2017 with another fine season of his own. brian's best pitches are his slider and fastball, but he can also mix in a changeup and forkball, throwing all consistently for strikes. He has solid control and is usually good at keeping the ball in the park.

Head Scout says: "brian has great knowledge of the game, but he has very little loyalty."




2019 Salary: $790k

govmentchedda made the jump into the starting rotation following degenerasian's departure and immediately emerged as a burgeoning star, being the only Burlington pitcher to earn an All-Star berth. chedda relies on his sinker and splitfinger to induce a high ratio of ground balls, and gave up only 5 homers in 32 starts, which he might not be quite lucky enough to duplicate this year.

Head Scout says: "govmentchedda is slow to catch on."




2019 Salary: $1.6M

Junkballer DSafetyGuy followed up a tough-luck 2017 with an 11-3 start to 2018 before regression to the mean and a brief, ill-advised tribute to Jack Morris saw him come crashing back to earth in the second half. Nonetheless, he again proved himself durable enough to eat up innings at the back end of the rotation. DSafe's velocity barely scratches 90 MPH, but he has good movement on his sinker and changeup, as well as a decent curveball.

Head Scout says: "DSafetyGuy knows how to fit in."




2019 Salary: $1.7M (Contract Year)

TT2.0 gave the Sports Frogs another solid if unspectacular year as a back-rotation starter. A lanky, intimidating left-hander, TT mixes his upper-90's fastball with a good slider and recently developed a respectable changeup. His control is so-so and he sometimes loses movement, making him susceptible to gopher balls. He is an adept fielder and is good at holding runners.

Head Scout says: "TT2.0 is mild-mannered on and off the field. Also, fuck Chad Burns!"


BULLPEN



2018 Salary: $2.0M

Cheese-cutting closer Shirley improved his ERA and save total after a frustrating 2017, but a penchant for giving up dinky hits put the team through a few more tense moments than they would have liked. Shirley's arsenal is limited to two pitches, but those two—a superb slider and a fastball in the mid-90s—are enough for him to close out the majority of his save opportunities while racking up plenty of K's. He is occasionally haunted by his rather mediocre control.

Head Scout says: "Shirley has a knack for doing impersonations."




2019 Salary: $7.0M

L-Jam, whose ugly 2017 ERA was skewed by a few disastrous outings early on, put up much more characteristic numbers in 2018 befitting his standing as a solid setup man. L-Jam has good velocity and and movement on his fastball, slider, and change. He is an iron man who almost never encounters injury problems.

Note: The AI pitching coach is advising me to make L-Jam the regular closer over Shirley, which might be another subplot to watch.

Head Scout says: "L-Jam puts in long hours."




2019 Salary: $510k

tennbengal graduated to the primary left-handed setup role following Johnnie's departure and put in an impressive performance, striking out 50 in just over 38 innings. bengal's game is built around his blistering cut fastball which brushes against 100 MPH, along with a good slider. He is dogged, though, by occasional control problems.

Head Scout says, "tennbengal has been called humdrum."




2019 Salary: $765k

HaulCitgo put in another year of capable service as a long reliever and spot starter. Working with just borderline stuff, HaulCitgo knows his limitations and won't try to do more than he can. Occasionally he'll sneak in an above-average curveball. On the flip side, he doesn't get too many strikeouts and relies a little more on his teammates' fielding than the manager would like.

Head Scout says: "HaulCitgo is an extremely hard worker and is popular in the clubhouse."




2019 Salary: $1.1M (Contract Year)

Canadian import travzilla arrived in Burlington to fill the LOOGY role and filled the job adequately. Among travzilla's pitches, only his slider is above-average, but he sometimes surprises hitters by challenging them when they least expect it.

Head Scout says: "travzilla is quiet and doesn't stand out in a crowd."




2019 Salary: $510k

vandwagon was brought up from AAA early in the year to fill out a short-armed bullpen and settled comfortably in a middle relief role. His out pitch is a cut fastball that approaches 100 MPH, but the rest of his arsenal is limited and he'll need to improve his control if he wants to hold down a more substantial role.

Head Scout says: "vandwagon never shows any lack of effort."

This is all so amazing!

1987 Topps design too...NICE

great shit carwash

I had no idea Rex is Arn Anderson.

Forget about those scrubs. We want the Oats!!!

Except Rex, his Arn impression is top notch. Do we have anyone that looks like Sid? That would be a great reenactment.

Unanimous choice for best line, I assume?

Sabo wrote: ↑Wed Mar 27, 2019 7:47 am I had no idea Rex is Arn Anderson.

I was thinking Walter Sobchak

You literally got a spit take out of me with that Fuck Chad Burns. Well played.