Man's Search For Meaning

[Shrew]

So as some of you know I've spent the last few years battling a nasty addiction to alcohol. In addition to 12 step programs I've also spent a fair amount of time on the psychiatrist's couch. One of the things we've touched upon lately is that I lack a sense of purpose or even passionate feelings about anything, Except maybe using cat anuses as video recorders,

I've read a bunch of shiat on the subject of purpose and meaning. The most influential of course being “Man's Search For Meaning”.

Right now I live in a sober house where people are content to sit on the porch and watch the world go by on the state's dime. I guess I'm old school because my identity is tied to what I do for a living. I feel like a leech. I think I'm ready to make a move to anywhere to support a worthy charity that would help give me a sense of purpose and would like some ideas from the swamp. Money is no object. Nor is location. Although I'd prefer not to end up a bit character in “Heart of Darkness Redux”.

BTW, what gives your life purpose and meaning? What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

[brian]

BTW, what gives your life purpose and meaning? What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

Drinking.

(Sorry, Swampers gonna Swamp. Good luck on your journey.)

[Shrew]

I would be very disappointed if I did not get at least one smart arse response. But I am also hoping for a couple serious ones. Please help me out here guys

[brian]

If I had an honest, real answer I would have given one. For what it's worth. My life definitely lacks meaning & purpose. Though sometimes I like it that way. Purpose often means responsibility.

[govmentchedda]

Maybe do charity work? Don't worry about which one, just go give freely of some of your time.

Set a goal to accomplish something that will make you feel better physically. Run a mile in less than 10 minutes, 9 minutes, etc. Do 20 pushups a day, 30, 40.

That's all the advice I've got.

[kranepool]

Yo, Viktor Frankl. I'd like to hear more about this.

Except maybe using cat anuses as video recorders

The first time I got sober, my sponsor would host a Friday night card game and not let me leave before 2:00am. I loved spending time with him, but when you get up at 4, going to bed at 2:30 is rough. Years later, I found out he was just waiting for the bars to close before releasing me. His thing is getting out of his head and reaching out to the new guy - to help, even if only on a micro level. I'll never forget that.

I don't pretend to know what the answer is, but start small, do it daily, and let it find you.

If that makes any sense.

[Jerloma]

I started typing and I realized I'm pretty much just saying what Minchin says in this commencement speech except not nearly as profoundly. Just watch this...trust me.





Bottom line is that in spite of your afflictions and negative experiences, you're still unthinkably lucky to be you.

[brian]

Yo Jerloma, Minchin is great and ima let you finish, but this is the best commencement speech in the history of all-time (and relevant to the thread and your question as well, Shrew)

[Scottie]

My two cents. Psychiatrists are psychobabble snake oil sellers; absolute frauds that are a complete waste of time and money. For someone that is an alcoholic, a psychiatrist is entirely useless. Only an alcoholic can explain life during and after alcoholism. You don't go to a butcher to learn how to bake; candlesticks are right out of the question.

The only way you will never find any meaning in life is to go out questing for meaning. There is no meaning. The universe is staggeringly vast. Dozens of millions of light years in diameter. Really big. And that's just the tiny part we know of. People? Any creature on this one planet out of an infinite number of planets? We are infinitesimally small. Futile to seek a "Eureka!" moment of sudden meaning if you are even remotely aware of your own fragile and minutely ephemeral tiny existence.

So why live, right? Many reasons. Even in pre-civilization times, certain standards have held true. Find someone you love and who loves you, be gainfully employed. Don't be an asshole. Don't fuck people over. Surprisingly, you'll have a very good shot at a decent life if you just go through it as a nice guy trying to make a living. Fancy possessions are for the insecure; you don't need a Ferrari. Booze answers nothing; it gives you a few hours of oblivion followed by far more hours of hellish misery. It destroys your stomach, your liver and your brain. Worse than that, it destroys your family and anyone who gives a damn about you. Denied reality is no way to embrace reality. Why live? Because billions of people before you have figured out that stability matters. And stability is simple. A roof over your head and family in some fashion.

Want to do something positive? Eliminate noise from your life. Silence is the most perfect of sound. A psychiatrist is the worst of noise; the cement-mixer of intellect. Eliminate noise; not just sound noise but stress noise, self-created noise, over-compensation noise, pressure noise, huckster noise. All of it.

So why live? What's the meaning? What is the whatness of all what? Billions before you have wondered. Billions before you have looked up at the stars, awestruck and pondering. None of it matters. You live an entire life in that cubic inch of real estate inside of your own brain which is stuck here on Earth. Even if later this afternoon someone impossibly provided the correct explanation for the entire universe's existence, so what? You'd still have to wake up in the morning and make coffee, head to work. Billions before you have had to do this. The upside is that billions before you have created some fascinating ways to endure life and make it rather interesting; you are welcome to create some yourself. You are not the only one out there that thought "well, I'm stuck here, what to do?" There's no shortage of outlets. Literature, music, arts, puppies, baseball, cooking, travel, film, whatever.

Coming to grips with the fact that there is no answer to life's meaning beyond its ultimate irrelevance is the best possible step you can take. The meaning of life is that there is no meaning to life. That's not devastating news; it's wonderful. It frees you up from all the bullshit obligations of religion, gimcrack engineering and tacky protocols.

Don't waste time looking for life's meaning, it's been right in front of you all the time.

[The Sybian]

My kids. That is about it.

[howard]

…Eliminate noise; not just sound noise but stress noise, self-created noise, over-compensation noise, pressure noise, huckster noise. All of it.

Oh, I like that. I like that a lot.

[Rush2112]

"Try and be nice to people, avoid eating fat, read a good book every now and then, get some walking in, and try and live together in peace and harmony with people of all creeds and nations."

[The Sybian]

Scottie, I love your post. I can't believe nobody answered 42, but the Swamp has been slipping. Anywho, one slight disagreement with Scottie. While I believe that psychoanalysis is just useless noise (YMMV), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy does exactly what you are advising. It teaches you to block out the self-inflicted noise and negativity and have more productive thoughts. It is also incredibly helpful for people with specific anxieties like fear of flying or claustrophobia.

[Pruitt]

My kids. That is about it.

Me too.

And a feeling that something good will happen tomorrow. And if not tomorrow, then maybe the next day.

[Jerloma]

Yo Jerloma, Minchin is great and ima let you finish, but this is the best commencement speech in the history of all-time (and relevant to the thread and your question as well, Shrew)

They're practically saying the same thing, too. Someone put that to a video. Not sure if you've ever seen it...

[testuser2]

Don't waste time looking for life's meaning, it's been right in front of you all the time.

Great post and topic. I've been questioning my own path recently. Maybe it's the approaching 40's.

I've become much more protective of my time. Spend it doing the things I want. Working extra hours may help me get ahead, but is that what I really want? Won't I just end up spending more time working? I like my job, but I'm kidding myself if I think I won't quit immediately if I won the lottery.

This is what I see as important. Family and friends. The more time I get to spend with those groups the better. For volunteering.... Coaching and Boy Scouts. I want to see my boys grow into men, but along the way I may be able to help out some others do the same. If I didn't have kids? I think Habitat for Humanity.

[P.D.X.]

Travel. Preferably somewhere warm and with few gringos.

[Steve of phpBB]

I guess I'm mostly with Scottie, though it won't be written nearly as well.

I don't know that you can actively look for purpose and meaning. I think you just have to do what you have to do, and try to enjoy the ride when and where you can. What gets me out of bed in the morning is the fact that I have to go to work because I have a job I have to do and usually enjoy and because I need an income stream to pay for the kids to go to college and to live on when I get old.

I would definitely be content to sit on a porch and watch the world go by. Or sitting on a dock, watching the tide roll away.

[sancarlos]

Lots of good stuff in this thread. The parts that particularly resonate with me are the parts about finding someone to love, who also loves you; and the part about kids - although that could be extrapolated to mean helping anyone you particularly care about.

[devilfluff]

Is it strange that I've never felt the need to look for a deeper meaning?

Life just is. Absorb it, accept it, roll with it, hump it into submission.

I've always been about keeping on, just keep moving forward... Sometimes it even works. I try to find things that make me happy, then latch on to them. People have no power over you that you didn't give them. That asshole trying to demean you is just distant barking if you don't care about their opinion.

Doesn't sound complicated, but doing it seems to be much more difficult.

Probably not much help there, sadly...

[The Sybian]

Is it strange that I've never felt the need to look for a deeper meaning?

Life just is. Absorb it, accept it, roll with it, hump it into submission.

I've always been about keeping on, just keep moving forward... Sometimes it even works. I try to find things that make me happy, then latch on to them. People have no power over you that you didn't give them. That asshole trying to demean you is just distant barking if you don't care about their opinion.

Doesn't sound complicated, but doing it seems to be much more difficult.

Probably not much help there, sadly...

Not weird at all, I have a very similar take. I just said kids because this thread made me think about it. Then again I have clinical depression, feeling like life is a pointless endeavor is part of the symptoms, so maybe I'm not a good judge of what is normal here. That said, I believed their was no grand meaning of life before I was depressed, just to try to enjoy the ride and make it better for others, or at least not worse.

[Brontoburglar]

Lots of good stuff in this thread. The parts that particularly resonate with me are the parts about finding someone to love, who also loves you; and the part about kids - although that could be extrapolated to mean helping anyone you particularly care about.

I guess this is kind of where I am right now with this too -- it's about finding people who I like to spend time with and who are genuine, etc and just enjoying each other's company.

Of course, that goes further with the significant other angle too. For a single guy who watches and writes about sports, it's a little hard to figure out what the fuck the greater good you're working towards is.

[GoodKarma]

Anybody seen this before? The Egg by Andy Weir

http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;