"I Did It"

howard · Post by **howard** » Mon Jul 22, 2013 4:59 pm

Ryan Braun admits PED use, suspended for rest of 2013

cerrano · Post by **cerrano** » Mon Jul 22, 2013 5:08 pm

are suspensions usually without pay? i would imagine so, but every outlet is almost putting that fact in their lede.

Post by **brian** » Mon Jul 22, 2013 5:38 pm

What are the chances this suspension happens if the Brewers are 58-41 instead of 41-58? 0.01 percent? 0.0001 percent? I'm going to scream at the first dipshit talking head who praises Braun for "taking his punishment like a man". It's not so bad to get a two-month unpaid vacation when you have zero chance at the playoffs and still have $100M of salary guaranteed for the rest of your contract.

Post by **Sabo** » Mon Jul 22, 2013 8:51 pm

cerrano wrote:are suspensions usually without pay? i would imagine so, but every outlet is almost putting that fact in their lede.

Someone mentioned on Twitter that his lost pay would equate to 560,000 bacon grilled cheese sandwiches served at Miller Park. That's a lot of bacon.

Jerloma · Post by **Jerloma** » Mon Jul 22, 2013 11:43 pm

If this means the Yankees get to lose A-Rod's contract, I'm all for it.

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 1:19 am

I love when your righteous indignation comes back to slap you in the face. Last year this is what he said after successfully beating the 50 game suspension on a technicality:

I truly believe in my heart and I would bet my life that this substance never entered my body at any point.

But he's still going to get paid a ridiculous amount of money until 2020.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 5:23 am

Does one commend a person who tells the truth in a difficult situation? Or does one think about how many lies that person told previously?

Johnnie · Post by **Johnnie** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 6:01 am

Pruitt wrote:Does one commend a person who tells the truth in a difficult situation? Or does one think about how many lies that person told previously?

In this guy's case? Fuck and no. He should have come clean when his piss was pinged the first time. Instead, he hid behind the technicality that his urine wasn't sent out immediately (it was sent out after the weekend) and thus could have been tampered with. Then he plays victim like someone set him up and spouts that bullshit I quoted. If the dude had one ounce of integrity he would have manned up immediately and said something to the tune of "Despite the fact that my urine could have been tampered with, it probably wasn't. I did use an illegal substance for [X reason]. It was stupid of me and I will accept whatever punishment is necessary." Now he's spun up in this Biogenesis nonsense? The dude deserved more than the rest of the season.

howard · Post by **howard** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 6:41 am

Pruitt wrote:Does one commend a person who tells the truth in a difficult situation? Or does one think about how many lies that person told previously?

The latter.

I hate this dynamic so fucking much. I think it is much more pervasive, and much more acceptable in recent decades than previously. Not just in sports, or in the public view, but throughout society. Yet another bad sign.

As boxing promoter Bob Arum once protested, defending his credibility and explaining why a reporter should believe what he was saying; "yesterday I was lying; today I'm telling you the truth".

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 7:55 am

Yeah, that's my feeling as well.

His previous denials (like so many) were reminiscent of Groucho Mark: "Who are you going to believe, me or your own lying eyes?"

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 9:53 am

brian wrote:What are the chances this suspension happens if the Brewers are 58-41 instead of 41-58? 0.01 percent? 0.0001 percent? I'm going to scream at the first dipshit talking head who praises Braun for "taking his punishment like a man". It's not so bad to get a two-month unpaid vacation when you have zero chance at the playoffs and still have $100M of salary guaranteed for the rest of your contract.

I'd say 100%. MLB absolutely HATES Braun at this point.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 9:54 am

Pruitt wrote:Does one commend a person who tells the truth in a difficult situation? Or does one think about how many lies that person told previously?

I would use the same PEDs, but I wouldn't have douched it up as much as he did last year. At least I don't think I would have.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 9:56 am

Icepenis wrote:
Pruitt wrote:Does one commend a person who tells the truth in a difficult situation? Or does one think about how many lies that person told previously?
I would use the same PEDs, but I wouldn't have douched it up as much as he did last year. At least I don't think I would have.

You would have released a youtube video called "PED Safety Tips"

Post by **brian** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:02 am

Icepenis wrote:
brian wrote:What are the chances this suspension happens if the Brewers are 58-41 instead of 41-58? 0.01 percent? 0.0001 percent? I'm going to scream at the first dipshit talking head who praises Braun for "taking his punishment like a man". It's not so bad to get a two-month unpaid vacation when you have zero chance at the playoffs and still have $100M of salary guaranteed for the rest of your contract.

I'd say 100%. MLB absolutely HATES Braun at this point.

I get that, but I'm saying Braun would have fought it like all of the other Biogenesis patients and he probably would have been able to be suspended at the beginning of 2014 (if at all) like the rest of them. There's nothing noble about him taking his punishment now when the season is already lost.

rass · Post by **rass** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:04 am

brian wrote:
Icepenis wrote:
brian wrote:What are the chances this suspension happens if the Brewers are 58-41 instead of 41-58? 0.01 percent? 0.0001 percent? I'm going to scream at the first dipshit talking head who praises Braun for "taking his punishment like a man". It's not so bad to get a two-month unpaid vacation when you have zero chance at the playoffs and still have $100M of salary guaranteed for the rest of your contract.

I'd say 100%. MLB absolutely HATES Braun at this point.
I get that, but I'm saying Braun would have fought it like all of the other Biogenesis patients and he probably would have been able to be suspended at the beginning of 2014 (if at all) like the rest of them. There's nothing noble about him taking his punishment now when the season is already lost.

Also, Braun will be making significantly more money per season when his extension kicks in next year, so he stands to lose less if suspended this season.

ZMan · Post by **ZMan** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:09 am

brian wrote:It's not so bad to get a two-month unpaid vacation when you have zero chance at the playoffs and still have $100M of salary guaranteed for the rest of your contract.

rass wrote:Also, Braun will be making significantly more money per season when his extension kicks in next year, so he stands to lose less if suspended this season.

Don't forget, he's also due $4.5 mil from Aaron Rodgers

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:09 am

brian wrote:
Icepenis wrote:
brian wrote:What are the chances this suspension happens if the Brewers are 58-41 instead of 41-58? 0.01 percent? 0.0001 percent? I'm going to scream at the first dipshit talking head who praises Braun for "taking his punishment like a man". It's not so bad to get a two-month unpaid vacation when you have zero chance at the playoffs and still have $100M of salary guaranteed for the rest of your contract.

I'd say 100%. MLB absolutely HATES Braun at this point.
I get that, but I'm saying Braun would have fought it like all of the other Biogenesis patients and he probably would have been able to be suspended at the beginning of 2014 (if at all) like the rest of them. There's nothing noble about him taking his punishment now when the season is already lost.

Ahhhh. Got it. I misunderstood you.

Yeah, he may have fought it in that case.

A_B · Post by **A_B** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:12 am

It definitely reeks of a settlement. " I'll take the rest of the year off if you agree that this is my only suspension related to this."

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:12 am

AB_skin_test wrote:It definitely reeks of a settlement. " I'll take the rest of the year off if you agree that this is my only suspension related to this."

That's because it was a settlement.

Gunpowder · Post by **Gunpowder** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:14 am

ZMan wrote:
brian wrote:It's not so bad to get a two-month unpaid vacation when you have zero chance at the playoffs and still have $100M of salary guaranteed for the rest of your contract.

rass wrote:Also, Braun will be making significantly more money per season when his extension kicks in next year, so he stands to lose less if suspended this season.
Don't forget, he's also due $4.5 mil from Aaron Rodgers

Maybe Aaron Rodgers and Braun made a "loser sucks the winner's dick" bet on the steroid thing and now Braun has to suck Aaron Rodgers's dick, although Braun claims that he doesn't have to since he didn't get suspended last year and they have to, like, take it to an arbitrator.

If I were God and I could make things happen, I would totally do stuff like that.

Pruitt · Post by **Pruitt** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 11:16 am

Apparently Ryan Braun is about to die. After all, he "bet his life" that "this substance" never entered his body. (0:49)

Scottie · Post by **Scottie** » Tue Jul 23, 2013 6:31 pm

Ryan Braun wrote:This situation has taken a toll on me and my entire family, and it is has been a distraction to my teammates and the Brewers organization.

That was the "I call shenanigans" moment for me. It's taken a toll on you? Damn, you caused all of this. Typically, I'd be willing to give him the benefit of the doubt since athletes tend to be limited in eloquence or even simple articulation and Braun may have simply chosen words poorly. But in this case? Nah. That reeks of audacity and self-sentimentality. This is a guy who got lucky last year when a 50-game suspension was effectively thrown out on a technicality yet he forged ahead anyway.

Why take the full suspension this season? For starters, his salary goes up to $10 million next year and serving time in 2014 would cost him about half a million dollars more. All depends on the meaning of "toll", I suppose.

The Swamp

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