2013 NFL Preseason

[Scottie]

I just read Deadspin's "Why Your Team Sucks 2013: Oakland Raiders" to steel my nerves for the season. Hilarious, particularly the fan emails he featured.

Afghanistan can be rebuilt quicker than this flaming shitwreck.

Well struck, that.

[sancarlos]

I just read Deadspin's "Why Your Team Sucks 2013: Oakland Raiders" to steel my nerves for the season. Hilarious, particularly the fan emails he featured.

That was awesome. As howard noted - particularly the fan emails. As I am somebody who has said for 40+ years, "my two favorite teams are the Broncos and whoever is playing the Raiders", it was like sugar in a spoon to me.

[Shirley]

I was excited to read the Steelers one, but it was kind of disappointing. The emails were a little better than the actual article, but even they were repetitive.

http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks ... 1065343296" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Pruitt]

The Bills "Why Your Team Sucks" was sadly spot on.

Here's a quote from a fan:

Our kids have nothing to look forward to.

[Joe K]

Deadspin piles on Pete Prisco too for a really, really stupid concussion-related column

Jeez...

Keith Olbermann destroyed Prisco for that column on his show last night, too. I didn't like Olbermann at all when he was doing politics, but I've enjoyed what I've seen so far of his new show on ESPN2. I'd much rather watch that than Sportscenter.

[kranepool]

Tebow released by Pats. Is there any way he doesn't get picked up by the Bills? Even if only for the playbook?

[Joe K]

Wasn't there a report that part of the problem with Tebow is that he has a learning disability and couldn't learn NFL playbooks? Although I agree that as compared to Jeff Tuel, Tebow doesn't seem like that bad of an option.

[brian]

I suppose it's a fair point to say that Tebow gives you a better chance to win Week 1 than Tuel, but he has zero upside. You might as well see what Tuel can do and hope he can develop into a serviceable backup to Manuel going forward. Not like the Bills are going to make the playoffs this year anyway. They'd probably be well-served to go into full-on Clowney tank mode in fact.

[kranepool]

Follow-up question: when will Ralph Wilson die?

[Scottie]

I recall reading that Tebow is dyslexic. Or partially so, if that's possible. Bottom line is he was trying to get a job as quarterback on one of the NFL's best teams; a team that carries only two quarterbacks (Brady and Mallett). It is highly difficult, if not unlikely, to crack that lineup.

And those claims that he can go "play in Canada"? No way do I see that guy playing in Canada. Not the way the CFL is played. No way at all.

And, naturally, the hardcore Christian element is lighting up Twitter screeching that Timmay was cut for his beliefs. No, he was cut because he's not good enough to make that team. It happens. "Oh, yeah, I bet if he was a gay rights activist he'd still be on the team!" No, it's the NFL. If you're not good enough, you're baggage. It's not as if there are no Christians in the NFL; look at the huge prayer circles at midfield after each game. Or when a guy gets hit so hard or so awkwardly that they need a stretcher to cart him off. What do you see? Guys praying all over the place.

Tebow's bejeezezness has nothing to do with his current state of unemployment.

[howard]

Keith Olbermann destroyed Prisco for that column on his show last night, too. I didn't like Olbermann at all when he was doing politics, but I've enjoyed what I've seen so far of his new show on ESPN2. I'd much rather watch that than Sportscenter.

I'm digging Olbermann's new show too. But I was a fan of his political reporting (while not a fan of his politics--I find him entertaining). I stopped watching sportscenter years ago, and get my scores/highlights from the web, but Keith has been fun this week.

[sancarlos]

Green Bay's starting left tackle is rookie 4th round pick, David Bakhtiari from Colorado. Fun fact: he went to Serra high school in San Mateo, CA. Same school as Tom Brady, Barry Bonds, Lynn Swann and a bunch of other pros.

[Rush2112]

With the state of the Buffs recently it's amazing that they have any NFLers, but seem to churn out some good tackles.

Green Bay's starting left tackle is rookie 4th round pick, David Bakhtiari from Colorado.

[Johnnie]

I recall reading that Tebow is dyslexic. Or partially so, if that's possible. Bottom line is he was trying to get a job as quarterback on one of the NFL's best teams; a team that carries only two quarterbacks (Brady and Mallett). It is highly difficult, if not unlikely, to crack that lineup.

And those claims that he can go "play in Canada"? No way do I see that guy playing in Canada. Not the way the CFL is played. No way at all.

And, naturally, the hardcore Christian element is lighting up Twitter screeching that Timmay was cut for his beliefs. No, he was cut because he's not good enough to make that team. It happens. "Oh, yeah, I bet if he was a gay rights activist he'd still be on the team!" No, it's the NFL. If you're not good enough, you're baggage. It's not as if there are no Christians in the NFL; look at the huge prayer circles at midfield after each game. Or when a guy gets hit so hard or so awkwardly that they need a stretcher to cart him off. What do you see? Guys praying all over the place.

Tebow's bejeezezness has nothing to do with his current state of unemployment.

This, completely.

And what ESPN knows is that they have this faction of the NFL population watching. So whenever anything Tim Tebow related happens, no matter how mundane or routine, it's splashed on the front page.

Riley Cooper says the N word? Tim Tebow is praying for him. Front page. Bob Kraft is 'rooting' for him to succeed. Front page. He went to the same college as Aaron Hernandez and is 'shocked' by his involvement in a crime. Front page. They've been able to prey upon the stupidity, vapidity, and one-track mindlessness of the 'Hardcore Christian Element' since college. And Christians are far too stupid to realize they are being lead on. (This permeates everything and everywhere regarding them, mind you.) So, like you said, when someone has the gall to suggest -- A dios mio! -- that Tim Tebow isn't a good quarterback or even a serviceable one, it's, and are you sitting down for this, an attack on their religion.

I'm not saying these people suffer from anosognosia, but they are exhibiting some very obvious symptoms.

[Pruitt]

Follow-up question: when will Ralph Wilson die?

From the fan comment section of "Why Your Team Sucks" Bills edition:

Jim Kelly and Marv Levy have cancer. Ralph Wilson does not, per his antebellum-era deal with Satan.

The more charitable way to look at it is that Wilson is a cheap bastard who made his first fortune in insurance. As he can see no tangible financial benefit in dying, he simple will not do so.

[The Sybian]

I recall reading that Tebow is dyslexic. Or partially so, if that's possible. Bottom line is he was trying to get a job as quarterback on one of the NFL's best teams; a team that carries only two quarterbacks (Brady and Mallett). It is highly difficult, if not unlikely, to crack that lineup.

And those claims that he can go "play in Canada"? No way do I see that guy playing in Canada. Not the way the CFL is played. No way at all.

And, naturally, the hardcore Christian element is lighting up Twitter screeching that Timmay was cut for his beliefs. No, he was cut because he's not good enough to make that team. It happens. "Oh, yeah, I bet if he was a gay rights activist he'd still be on the team!" No, it's the NFL. If you're not good enough, you're baggage. It's not as if there are no Christians in the NFL; look at the huge prayer circles at midfield after each game. Or when a guy gets hit so hard or so awkwardly that they need a stretcher to cart him off. What do you see? Guys praying all over the place.

Tebow's bejeezezness has nothing to do with his current state of unemployment.

This, completely.

And what ESPN knows is that they have this faction of the NFL population watching. So whenever anything Tim Tebow related happens, no matter how mundane or routine, it's splashed on the front page.

Riley Cooper says the N word? Tim Tebow is praying for him. Front page. Bob Kraft is 'rooting' for him to succeed. Front page. He went to the same college as Aaron Hernandez and is 'shocked' by his involvement in a crime. Front page. They've been able to prey upon the stupidity, vapidity, and one-track mindlessness of the 'Hardcore Christian Element' since college. And Christians are far too stupid to realize they are being lead on. (This permeates everything and everywhere regarding them, mind you.) So, like you said, when someone has the gall to suggest -- A dios mio! -- that Tim Tebow isn't a good quarterback or even a serviceable one, it's, and are you sitting down for this, an attack on their religion.

I'm not saying these people suffer from anosognosia, but they are exhibiting some very obvious symptoms.

But he is so brave to come out and admit he is part of the 80% majority in this country! Because no other athlete has praised G-d or thanked Jesus in an interview or pointed to Sky Daddy after doing something good.

[Jerloma]

If he were a gay rights activist he would have made the team? We should be legally allowed to kill people that say things that stupid.

[Gunpowder]

I recall reading that Tebow is dyslexic. Or partially so, if that's possible. Bottom line is he was trying to get a job as quarterback on one of the NFL's best teams; a team that carries only two quarterbacks (Brady and Mallett). It is highly difficult, if not unlikely, to crack that lineup.

And those claims that he can go "play in Canada"? No way do I see that guy playing in Canada. Not the way the CFL is played. No way at all.

And, naturally, the hardcore Christian element is lighting up Twitter screeching that Timmay was cut for his beliefs. No, he was cut because he's not good enough to make that team. It happens. "Oh, yeah, I bet if he was a gay rights activist he'd still be on the team!" No, it's the NFL. If you're not good enough, you're baggage. It's not as if there are no Christians in the NFL; look at the huge prayer circles at midfield after each game. Or when a guy gets hit so hard or so awkwardly that they need a stretcher to cart him off. What do you see? Guys praying all over the place.

Tebow's bejeezezness has nothing to do with his current state of unemployment.

Which is odd because the Ravens cut the gay rights activist after last season.

[Gunpowder]

Kluwe got cut by two teams as well. So gay rights activists are struggling in the NFL these days.

[Jerloma]

Yeah, but that was for being an atheist.

Or a bad punter.

[Rush2112]

But he is so brave to come out and admit he is part of the 80% majority in this country! Because no other athlete has praised G-d or thanked Jesus in an interview or pointed to Sky Daddy after doing something good.

[DSafetyGuy]

I'm not going to debate the merits of Kluwe's punting ability other than to say that, as a Bears fan, it was a positive to see him ply his trade.

Of course, shortly after his release was announced, PFT listed the vague "murmurings" or the like about how NFL personnel think he is distracted by his off-field exploits. You know, because punting should be 24/7/365.

[The Sybian]

I'm not going to debate the merits of Kluwe's punting ability other than to say that, as a Bears fan, it was a positive to see him ply his trade.

Of course, shortly after his release was announced, PFT listed the vague "murmurings" or the like about how NFL personnel think he is distracted by his off-field exploits. You know, because punting should be 24/7/365.

Despite strongly agreeing with him, I found him to be a complete and utter douche when addressing the issue.

[sancarlos]

I was rooting for Kluwe and will continue to hope he gets another job, because I like anybody who breaks the narrow mold of what an NFL player should be.

[howard]

…I like anybody who breaks the narrow mold of what an NFL player should be.

So does my buddy Hannah Storm

[sancarlos]

…I like anybody who breaks the narrow mold of what an NFL player should be.

So does my buddy Hannah Storm