The Official Swamp Dating Thread

[Giff]

You gotta step up to the plate. It's a three true outcomes situation:

Yes (HR)/ no (K)/ things get "hand"led (BB).

Sometimes the situation calls for an IBB, but these days that's usually for road games or IR stints.

Outstanding.

Do NOT call to the bullpen, though.

I keep trying to add a free agent to bolster the pitching depth, but she's set on a one-man rotation.

[Nonlinear FC]

You gotta step up to the plate. It's a three true outcomes situation:

Yes (HR)/ no (K)/ things get "hand"led (BB).

Sometimes the situation calls for an IBB, but these days that's usually for road games or IR stints.

Outstanding.

Do NOT call to the bullpen, though.

Um. Some teams really like to use the bullpen.

ETA - Dammit. I was too slow... And not as clever.

[govmentchedda]

*calls back in*

Thanks, I'll try that when I get home and call back to report the results.

*click*

Dying over here.

[HaulCitgo]

Get the bullpen warm and you won't even have to worry about phrasing

[rass]

*calls back in*

Thanks, I'll try that when I get home and call back to report the results.

*click*

Need to “adapt” that if we ever do another sportsfrog/Swamp t-shirt…

[tennbengal]

Back in. (at some point)

Eventful year. Jen and I tried again starting back in May - had a really good year, lots of travel, but we've decided to go ahead and call it. We are at peace as we've really tried and did counseling all that. We are parting on excellent terms and the friendship remains intact. That remains absolutely crucially important to me.

This time we will make it official, seeing a divorce mediator in February but we've already agreed to everything major I think. I will move out this time so she can stay in the house. The biggest immediate blow is the pups are staying with her and the house but the apartment I've located is only 15 minutes away so I can get up to walk them and what not as often as work will allow. Plus the apartment is dog friendly so with a deposit I can open the door to them staying with me the occasional weekend. Lol, yes, not exactly dog custody but...not not that.

Don't regret trying one more time (32 years is/was a long time) except it did cost me a burgeoning relationship with someone I was starting to care very deeply about that I met earlier in 2024 during the initial separation. That path not taken haunts me and I do regret that loss very much. She's the one who sparked my discovering how much I loved live music on top of other things - she was great and I blew that. Too soon and I was not in the right place in several respects and that's on me, but it sucks.

In any event, moving out first week of March . Work is gonna be crazy busy for awhile anyway so that will take a lot of my time and keep me distracted. Also, my burgeoning love of live music (and especially billy strings) I am gonna feed, have tickets for small and large shows lined up in March (local), April (Savannah), May (local) and two in June - local and lexington which will hopefully involve me bothering AB for an hour or three. Guess I will underscore on the dating profile that it would be swell if the next women I date also love live music/concerts.

Not exactly gonna be a swell bachelor pad because my mom is having significant health and mental issues (long-standing in both instances and might be starting the slide into sundowning) and it will solve some problems to move her in with me as it is dangerous for her to be on her own at this point. For as long as I can stand, anyway. More work for my therapist, I guess. Good luck, therapist. I am hoping that anyone I might date in the age 45-55 cohort will understand about caring for an aging parent...

Maybe I will find time to see a few more of you IRL in 2025 when I wander the locally regional earth (dsafe and ShirleyDave shoutouts for 2024). Was glad to see ShirleyDave when he was in Baltimore last month for a convention - we figured out the last time we had met was about 17 years prior. He's barely avoiding me bothering him again since I can't make the upcoming Strings concert weekend in Cary work for me. 17 years between meets, this place has been around a minute...

So, maybe dating again this spring. Dunno. Will tee it up, I suppose, and see what remains out there for women in a 35-mile radius around Hunt Valley, MD between ages 45-55 who have progressive politics and are not remotely discomforted by my trans child and hopefully love live music and, maybe, sports and such. Lol. This thread probably won't get bumped a lot now that I look at that especially when you add in my living with an aged parent starting in March.

Some of my darkest bad place depression from the fall has lifted a little. Still unpacking and will for a long time a lot of things w/ my therapist but I think this is the right path, for better or worse (as it were).

Peace, friends.

Aaron (bengal version)

[Giff]

Good luck, Aaron. I did the something similar near the end of my first marriage. We had separated and I had nearly come to terms with it being over and met a really cool chick. But then my wife wanted to give it another shot and I felt like I owed it to the marriage to do that so I ended things with the girl I'd met. Luckily it all worked out and I know it will for you too!

[govmentchedda]

Good luck, bengal.


Live music side note - Wilco and Waxahatchee just announced a spring tour and I know I'm hitting up one of the dates (likely Atlanta because the St. Pete show is sans Waxahatchee). Presale code is HOTSUN, if you or anyone else on here is so inclined. Presale opens tomorrow at 10.

[Giff]

Good luck, bengal.


Live music side note - Wilco and Waxahatchee just announced a spring tour and I know I'm hitting up one of the dates (likely Atlanta because the St. Pete show is sans Waxahatchee). Presale code is HOTSUN, if you or anyone else on here is so inclined. Presale opens tomorrow at 10.

Yup, definitely hitting that up.

[mister d]

Good luck, TB. Breaking off that first relationship probably will haunt you, but I imagine sticking with it versus giving the marriage a final chance would have even more so maybe frame it that way to your brain. Aside from the whole living with your mom thing, having an apartment sounds fun. I very much don't want the kids out of the house, but the whole "no more house" piece is the silver lining.

[sancarlos]

Good luck TB! Sucks that she took the dogs, too!

[tennbengal]

It's fine! I am about to move into 12-14 hour days for awhile at work, and I can't have the pups in the same 1100 square feet as my mother given her balance issues etc. And locking them in my bedroom would suck for them, and getting someone to come walk them twice a day would be expensive. Like I said, I am close enough to the house that I can see them and walk them as I have time on the weekends and what not. We can revisit this again, too.

[HaulCitgo]

So when you get around to writing up your exploits... we want enough detail to know what it smells like.

[P.D.X.]

ew

[mister d]

Is it stinky?

[The Sybian]

Is it stinky?

If you have to ask... What a call back on that name, though.

Excited for you, TB. I hate to agree with MrD, but he summed up my take on the one that got away. If you gave it a go with her, whether it worked out or not, you'd always be wondering if you screwed up by not giving it another chance with Jen. It sounds like you got all the closure and answers you needed to be able to happily move on. IIRC, you've been with her since college, so I imagine there must be some excitement in being able to live your life for you and find yourself a bit. A bit of freedom, I guess.

[mister d]

If you have to ask... What a call back on that name, though.

Yes, I rarely post/talk publicly about the smell of other people's genitals.

[rass]

Good luck man.

[garyclark]

Big news. Sounds like you have a plan you're excited for and the right mindset. That's what's important.

[Shirley]

Man, that's another big shift, Bengal. But it sounds like you're both doing it now with full knowledge and open eyes. I'm sure it's the best plan. If you change your mind on Cary, let me know. That concert venue is super close to my house. I'll be able to hear him play from my yard unless I decide to talk my wife into going.

[tennbengal]

Man, that's another big shift, Bengal. But it sounds like you're both doing it now with full knowledge and open eyes. I'm sure it's the best plan. If you change your mind on Cary, let me know. That concert venue is super close to my house. I'll be able to hear him play from my yard unless I decide to talk my wife into going.

If I can make Cary work you will be the first to know. At the least, definitely plan on sitting outside and catching some of it second hand. So worth it.

[Giff]

Man, that's another big shift, Bengal. But it sounds like you're both doing it now with full knowledge and open eyes. I'm sure it's the best plan. If you change your mind on Cary, let me know. That concert venue is super close to my house. I'll be able to hear him play from my yard unless I decide to talk my wife into going.

If I can make Cary work you will be the first to know. At the least, definitely plan on sitting outside and catching some of it second hand. So worth it.

The music or the weed?

[tennbengal]

Man, that's another big shift, Bengal. But it sounds like you're both doing it now with full knowledge and open eyes. I'm sure it's the best plan. If you change your mind on Cary, let me know. That concert venue is super close to my house. I'll be able to hear him play from my yard unless I decide to talk my wife into going.

If I can make Cary work you will be the first to know. At the least, definitely plan on sitting outside and catching some of it second hand. So worth it.

The music or the weed?

Yes.

But also, in all seriousness, haven't needed the help to let my mind go (in a good way) at the other three concerts of his I have been to in the last few months.

[tennbengal]

Back on the dating horse, as it were, tonight. I am so far out of my league with this person I can't actually see the league she is in from where I am, but, hell, she was the one who suggested the date so I will take that as a win - my dating app game/chat skills remain decent anyway apparently.

Narrator voice -

Her - one of the world's foremost epidemiologists and cancer researchers - a real life Lara Croft type.

Him - pretty much Costanza.

Watch "When Sparks Don't Fly" , streaming now on Netflix.

---At the least, I am viewing this like playing with house money, just gonna enjoy the evening.

[rass]

Sounds more like a CBS sitcom. But good luck!

[tennbengal]

Sounds more like a CBS sitcom. But good luck!

Say! Those are long-running often!

[DSafetyGuy]

Her - one of the world's foremost epidemiologists and cancer researchers - a real life Lara Croft type.

---At the least, I am viewing this like playing with house money, just gonna enjoy the evening.

Tremendous opportunity to follow the oft-mentioned advice of getting someone to talk about their favorite subject: themself.

Man, that word looks weird.

[GoodKarma]

You'll be amazed how far "playing with house money" can get you. Back when I was dating it was amazing how much not caring or not putting pressure on myself or the situation improved my luck.

[HaulCitgo]

Last I checked you were some high-powered attorney so you get a spot start in that league. Bet it smells like antibacterial soap

[tennbengal]

Bet it smells like antibacterial soap

I laughed.

[Square Rob]

Godspeed Aaron

[sancarlos]

Good luck, bud. What woman wouldn't love you?

[tennbengal]

The one who is such an accomplished epidemiologist she has her own wikipedia page? Also, she reacted pretty negatively to the fact that I do plaintiffs med mal (altho she was the one who suggested the date anyway after learning that) so...not cooking with gas here. That said, genuinely looking forward to the evening, her research is unreal and given the upheaval in that world thanks to the cheeto and his cheeto-ettes, probably stuff on her mind (unless she doesn't want to talk about it, which...I would understand). I think from looking at her research she may have been part of the team that developed the HPV vax, and she's done work on Covid and HIV too.

Living in a city with the Johns Hopkins entities is wild...

I do have another first date lined up for next Saturday with another woman who I have been having really fun texts with - our initial bonding was over her love of bluegrass and concerts in general and we have a lot in common.

Also missed an initial chance to get drinks last night with a woman who reached out to me through a mutual.

So, I guess a decent start to re-starting the dating process (again).

[tennbengal]

Good luck, bud. What woman wouldn't love you?

Right? I'm delightful!

[A_B]

Bengal's dating Grant Wahl's widow.

[The Sybian]

Bengal's dating Grant Wahl's widow.

She’s got a thing for sports journalists… show her the old front page! Hopefully she hates scores.

[Shirley]

The one who is such an accomplished epidemiologist she has her own wikipedia page? Also, she reacted pretty negatively to the fact that I do plaintiffs med mal (altho she was the one who suggested the date anyway after learning that) so...not cooking with gas here. That said, genuinely looking forward to the evening, her research is unreal and given the upheaval in that world thanks to the cheeto and his cheeto-ettes, probably stuff on her mind (unless she doesn't want to talk about it, which...I would understand). I think from looking at her research she may have been part of the team that developed the HPV vax, and she's done work on Covid and HIV too.

Living in a city with the Johns Hopkins entities is wild...

I do have another first date lined up for next Saturday with another woman who I have been having really fun texts with - our initial bonding was over her love of bluegrass and concerts in general and we have a lot in common.

Also missed an initial chance to get drinks last night with a woman who reached out to me through a mutual.

So, I guess a decent start to re-starting the dating process (again).

Damn, you're on a heater!

[bfj]

Bengal's dating Grant Wahl's widow.

She’s got a thing for sports journalists… show her the old front page! Hopefully she hates scores.

Old school term for a dick pic.

[GoodKarma]

Good luck, bud. What woman wouldn't love you?

Right? I'm delightful!

You should show up wearing this...

[degenerasian]

don't sell yourself short, she's probably having the same coversation on her message board

Him - Funny, witty, socially engaged lawyer, so out of my league

Her - Totally awkward and looks at cells all day